Chapter 5

I was not sure how Chu Shian returned to communicate his parents, but Mrs Chu hasn't come to see me since then. When we met downstairs, she remained immobile, her stare complex, and I almost ran for my life.

Chu Shian and I elected to stay at the school after starting university; he made his own decision, but I was simply because I was in the mood for be with him.

We didn't have the same major, but our dorms were adjacent, and when there was no class, we were all together.

This pleasant existence made me believe that the nightmare of the past had never occurred. I were willing to trust Chu Shian totally; he needed me to be bold, therefore I would always be brave.

Chu Shian had an experimental report due that Saturday, and I considered coming home to pick up some clothing.

Still not at home, I heard cursing, sobbing, and yelling mingled together downstairs, causing the listeners to worry understandably. It appeared to be sent from the third floor, as everyone on the floors above and below craned their necks listening with a gaping mouth. I didn't pay much attention and just went home.

I haven't been home in two weeks, and my mother has been whining to me about it.

however set great food waiting for me. Even my father switched off his beloved television, showing his unnaturally worry for me.

"Have you seen Mrs Chu lately, son?" My mother gave me food and asked me a question at the dinner table.

My eating stopped, and I grabbed a piece of rib for her, adding, "I don't see her, I don't go out at school all the time."

"I don't know what to do these days, your Mrs Chu also doesn't come to my house, I phone her to go out, but she is always busy, is there something wrong in the house?" my mother groaned.

"What may be the problem? Simply speculating, so people don't have their own things to do, do they just come, talk with buddies all day?" said my father, raising an eyebrow. "Do you believe that dancing in discos is more casual? You're too neurotic"

"This old man just knows how to oppose me all day long, she hasn't arrived in a long time, this is uncommon," my mother sneered at my father.

I became uneasy when I overheard them discussing Mrs. Lu, and knowing that the two of them were going to argue, I immediately changed the subject to interrupt them: "By the time I came back,I heard the third floor was quite noisy; what's the dilemma?"

Hearing my statements, the two of them exchanged glances, but neither spoke, and the room fell silent.

I stared at the two of them suspiciously, only to hear my father sigh and say, "Instigator."

"Do you remember Mrs. Lu?" my mother asked, shaking her head. " It was the auntie who used to give you candy back you were in kindergarten ."

In my vision, a cautiously speaking face appeared. She used to be my father's coworker; they were both high school teachers who subsequently retired. When I was younger, she treated me very nice, routinely giving me sweets, and sometimes Su Zhian had a part, a stern but honest lady.

"Got it,so the sound coming from Mrs. Lu's house?"

My mother nodded, she opened her lips as if it were difficult to open, and after a while she murmured, "She has a son, you've met him a few times when you

you have also met several times, called him Xiao Fei Gege. I'm not sure what happened, but he's dating men,Haizz... That person's family was aware, strongly disapproved,after locking that guy inside, they brought Lu Fei back home, telling Mrs. Lu that her son had seduced their son and made him indecent. Mrs. Lu had been driven to the nuts, she seized a broom and began thrashing Lu Fei,done hitting him, she commanded him to kneel in the room... The commotion was deafening, the neighbors all went up, I'm not sure how many people went up to see the fun..."

A hand suddenly waved in front of me, "An An? What's wrong ?"

I raised my head and looked at my mother in the eyes, only to see that

I had no idea that when I went into a trance, chopsticks also droped on the table.

I pulled the corner of my lips to say same old, then took up my chopsticks, but my hands were trembling excessively. I attempted to make my voice more regular, trying to be calm as if there was nothing to say: "How do mother and father feel about this?"

"How are we feeling? Does this still need to be remarked on?" my mother questioned, raising her voice. " This is not typical! How are two lads together?"

"This is a problem of another family, don't talk much about it, but your mother is correct, aren't two boys indiscriminate?" said my father." What a travesty of tradition."

Unusual, indiscriminate, travesty... When these remarks stated from my dearest, it's like being hit by a meat grinder; the anguish was so intense that my internal guts constricted into a lump.

My mother continued slowly, perhaps because she thought her words were a bit rambunctious: "No one expects their children to make mistakes and hopes they grow up, form a family, get a good career, and enjoy a tranquil lifetime. Mrs. Lu is always alone, struggling to raise her boy, perhaps allowing him to fall in love with a man? This isn't only about Mrs. Lu; your mother and father are also unable to accept it."

I opened my mouth, unsure how to respond. I lifted down my head after a time and

"Now, a great deal of nations allow same-sex marriage, and our country's law ..."

My mother bluntly interrupted me: "Don't say such things to me, I know young people are open-minded, but being more open doesn't mean you can mess up."

"What's amiss with you today, and why are you battling with your parents over this?" My father lowered his chopsticks and spoke solemnly.

I looked up to see my father staring at me. I'm not sure how long he stared at me, but his eyes were piercing and penetrating, like if he was looking for something.

"I just..." My heart shook, and I licked my lips reflexively, attempting to seem nonchalant. "I was just startled at the appropriate time when I read the news related to this aspect, so to me,i should say a few more words."

"I don't care what adolescents think," he said, slightly relaxing his brows and picking up his chopsticks again, "we are always waiting for you to swiftly find a girlfriend to marry so that we can enjoy our happiness, generally don't watch garbage stuff."

I nodded, letting out a small sigh of relief that was barely audible, I couldn't settle my emotions, bent my head and ate a few pieces of rice,but quickly put down, "I'm full, I still have some work to complete at school. I'll return when I have time."

"What's the rush, you haven't dined enough yet." I hurredly changed my shoes and jogged outside.

I walked away from my mother's rambling noises.

It wasn't until I got out that I realized the earlier sensation of suffocation was better.

I remember Lu Fei, he studied very well,perceptive and was also handsome, he was seven years older than me, I only saw him a few times, he in my recollection is clean and affable, later he came to another area for studying and working, consequently we didn't see one other again.

The noise level on the third floor was substantially lower, and everyone upstairs and downstairs was conversing.

"Unexpected,Is it an illness or a perverse that the boy of the Lu family likes men?"

"Let's see whether Wang Lan can be arrogant again, husband died early, child is homosexual , eh..."

"Lu Fei is often lauded by his mother, and now look, that guy's parents have arrived to Lu's house, so embarrassing."

"I also said that her son is attractive and has a respectable career; why hasn't he been married until now; turns out he likes males; this is a pervert..."

"I'm not sure how adult men can be together; just contemplating it gives me shivers; disgusting."

...

I hurried out like I was being hunted, every syllable of those remarks stabbing my heart like a dagger. I had no idea words could be so cruel; if individuals chose to, they could murder people entirely on the basis of hearsay.

"Let's see whether Wang Lan can be arrogant again, husband died young, child is homosexual again, eh..."

I've never yearned to see Chu Shian so badly as I did now, grabbing a cab and sprinting to school. My heart felt empty, and the wind numbed my entire body.

I pushed through the door to find him asleep, the curtains in the dormitory drawn back, and the lights turned out. I recollected him telling his roommate back home that he was alone in the dorm.

My sight pierced the darkness to the front of his bed, where I carefully removed shoes, lifted his duvet, and leaned in to cuddle beside him. I had a sense of reality when I tightly gripped Chu Shian's sleeve.

The heart momentarily returned to its original location.

Perhaps my movement was too loud and disturbed him; I had just laid down and heard his voice, still a little hoarse when awoke: "An An?"

I said nothing and slowly crept into his chest, clutching him securely.

"It hasn't been long, but you missed me that much, huh?" Chu Shian said gleefully, touching my head.

I didn't deny it, only hummed gently, "Yep, missing you every second, every minute."

"When you return home at midday, what did Mrs. Su make for you, your mouth is so sweet," Chu Shian said, lowering his head and lifting my face with both hands.

I stared at him in ecstasy, suddenly recalling Xiao Fei Gege.

Remembering those people's vibrant talk, unstable emotions continued to rise, and every tiny dread began to arise from deep inside.

Chu Shian frowned, worry welled up in the bottom of his eyes, his finger lifted my face, softly brushed the corner of my eye: "What happened?"

I shook my head, evading his touch and burying the face in his collarbone. Chu Shian didn't ask me any more questions and instead massaged my back one by one.

His shallow breaths poured over the top of my head as he held me silently. It should have been a relaxing moment, but those thoughts and concerns were still boiling in the chest, unable to find a way out. To be able to soothe, something must be done immediately.

For a long time ,i drew his knuckles to my lips and kissed them: "Gege, let's make love."

"Do you know what you're saying?" Chu Shian stiffened, bowed his head, his eyes dark and constrained.

"Gege, let's make love," I repeated as I met his aggressive gaze, moved my head up, and kissed his Adam's apple with no texture.

His respiration came to a halt, his fauces glided up and down, his hands wrapped around my waist, and he turned to kiss me.

Chapter end