Chapter 11-Extra Story (1)

Su An's life came to an end at the age of eighteen when he saw no glimmer of optimism.

Chu Shian screamed madly forward, ready to jump, but was apprehended by the police in time, not permitting him even a corner of his shirt to be touched.

He gazed blankly at Su An, who was falling away from him. In a blurry vision, he blindly stretched his hand, and the corner of To An's lips gently curled up, then changed into a lovely brilliant crimson patch.

"I'm sorry, Chu Shian; I love you, and you must live."

This was Su An's final sentence to him.

From kind to brutal.

Chu Shian thought about it for a long time after that,Chu Shian thought over and over again, in fact there was a long period of time when Su An was not normal, always relying on him too much, why, after all, why didn't he ask.

He was cut off from his financial resources at the time, concealed Su An, worked every day on the program to gain additional money, and was so busy that he understood very little about his unusualness and didn't think much of it.

Chu Shian was tortured with regret and suffering.

Regret, unfortunately, had no remedy in this world.

Mrs. Su fainted on the spot and was transported to the hospital. Chu Shian sat on a chair outside the hospital room, his face pallid, remembering the final scene on the rooftop. Strong emotions slammed his brain like a mountain, his limbs lost sensation, and his heart appeared to suffocate, as if a sharp knife were stabbing him in the heart, his internal organs were all broken.

Mrs. Su calmed down in the hospital room and covered her eyes with her quivering hands. She slowly let go after a long time, a second as if it had passed through the four seasons of spring, summer, autumn, and winter.

"Our An An..." she said, her voice husky. A line of tears flooded her eyes and continued to pour before she could complete her sentence.

Mr. Su sat by the bed, attempting to straighten his back, but he quickly bowed down, his eyes red, his hands clinched into fists at his side, but he couldn't let go.

"I am his mother, but I had no idea his position was so terrible; when he banged his head on the ground , we should discover that he is not normal... ,Always skipping meals, what he said, but it doesn't feel good, it's summer in the room with the air conditioner on, wearing a long-sleeved shirt, because to cover the knife mark on the arm..."

But at the moment, all we could do was blame him, scold him, think he wants to die for a guy, say he has no dignity... I even threatened to kill myself..." Mrs. Su sobbed uncontrollably. , "He had been frightened of pain since boyhood, and whenever he bled, he requested his mother to blow... So many stab wounds... How could he have gotten down on his hand... When he fell... It must have hurt..."

Mr. Su's tears spilled on the blanket in front of him, and this stern parent of more than half his life now bent profoundly and silently.

"..." Chu Shian's hand, which clutched the hospital room door handle, drooped, he bowed his head, and there was no red color on his face.

When he turned back, he found his parents standing behind him; Mr. Chu's eye sockets were red, and Mrs. Chu was still crying; she must have heard the exchange in the hospital room.

Chu Shian passed them quietly, but his mother abruptly seized his elbow, her fingers trembling, her eyes wide with fear: "Where do you want to go?!"

"Let's go out for a while," He understood what his mother was scared of, and he smirked cruelly. "I swear to him, I have to live."

His mother looked surprised at him and slowly let go of his hand.

Chu Shian's heart was filled with an unreal sensation of loneliness till he stood on the main road. He usually reached his palm out automatically, grasping a fistful of air, he always thought that there must be someone beside him, intimately holding his hand, crossing the street with him.

"Beep, beep, beep!" While he was dazed,t he sound of the horn was followed by the hard sound of the automobile brakes. Chu Shian saw the car speed over there in the dazzling light, but he didn't want to back down. He stood there, thinking nothing of his mind, waiting for the automobile to hit.

"Careful!" It was the policeman on the rooftop who suddenly grabbed his arm and hauled him to the side of the road, dangerously grazing the automobile.

"Do you not wish to live any longer?Think of the consequences before you do anything!" said the cop, his eyes bloodshot and roared," Traffic accidents occurred annually because of the people's contempt ..."

Suddenly, his voice stopped mute, and the teenager in front of him seemed to have no idea when tears coated his cheeks, he silently wept tears, no moans, not even a lot of sad expressions, and felt the pain crushing the heart once again.

"Gege, remember to watch at the red lights before crossing the street." Su An's voice burst out in his ear.

Chu Shian agreed with a nod: "OK."

The policeman looked at him who was mumbling something, couldn't help but let out a deep sigh: "Just now, your parents are worried about you, coincidentally I am still at the hospital handling the incident, so they asked me to come over and take after you... Anyway, you have to think about your parents, as well as his parents..."

"My name is Chen Yang, the way I see things, I have saved your life twice, come find me in the future," the policeman continued, seeing Chu Shian didn't say anything. Chen Yang removed a piece of paper bearing a number and placed it into Chu Shian's pocket.

Chu Shian remained motionless, unsure if he could hear it or not, and turned to walk to the hospital, dumbfounded like a corpse without a soul.

Su An's body was burned because no one wanted him to be buried with his awful appearance.

Chu Shian went to the Su family's residence on the day of the cremation and knelt down in front of the Su couple, hitting his head three times,begging them to hand over Su An's ashes to him.

Mr.Su didn't say anything, Mrs.Su hugged the urn and silently cried. Feeling sorry for their son, didn't mean that they accept this, accept the feelings of the two of them.

"Why? Because of your selfishness, you did not let my son to die peacefully?" Mr. Su spoke up, his eyes keen and his tone firm.

"An An enjoys a bright environment, he doesn't like the dark, bury him in the ground, he won't be happy," Chu Shian said, looking at the urn.

Mrs. Su burst out crying at hearing this sentence, but Mr. Su remained mute. He was about to ask, Gave to you, would An An be happy? Again, He had no idea what he was thinking and decided not to respond.

Chu Shian got his dream that day, taking his darling little lover back home.

Chu Shian didn't cry a single tear on the day of Su An's funeral, and his parents were worried about him the entire time since he was so calm,nothing out of the ordinary, so quiet that it made people panic.

Like a refurbished throwaway machine, the outer shell was complete, but the inside had long since cracked.

Only Su An's clothing were buried in the grave, and after the loud wailing, only Chu Shian remained at this area.

He sat with his back to the gravestone, bent one knee up, and stared up at the sky, saying, "You prefer the clear sky the most, beautiful weather out today..."

"In the past, I always heard people claim that when people suffer to the point of no return, there would be no tears, which made me feel irrational, but today I finally realize... Obviously, the pain is excruciating, yet my eyes are dry and I am unable to cry."

He contrasted: "It's worse than being beat with a stick... An An, do you blame me for not finding you sooner, or do you blame me for responding to your other message..." Chu Shian explained: "It wasn't me, I'm sure you can guess, I said, I won't give in to this... I was sleeping at the time, my mom took my phone and sent it..."

Chu Shian was flung by Mr.Chu's glass without even avoiding it at the time, his brow was bleeding, and each wound on his back throbbing, disoriented for a second, fainted. He awoke at home,his parents announced that they were lanning to settle overseas.

"... Then blame me for being late; if you wait half a day, no, an hour, I'll come and pick you up...No, blame me, shouldn't chose to jump out the window at the airport restroom, even if I leap off the bus midway, I can catch up before you get off..." Chu Shian shook his head.

"Isn't it painful?" Chu Shian examined his arm, noticing a knife mark beneath the sleeve that surprised him, "I tried it the other day...

How could you cut it when you were so afraid of pain... You must have been terrified at the moment. I'm not at your side, and when you're terrified, do you ever wonder why this awful Chu Shian isn't here..."

"... When you asked me what I loved about you before, I didn't respond because I didn't know... It appears like I was born to meet and love you. Before loving you, I never had anything significant to accomplish in my life; after loving you, I couldn't think of anything more important than loving you..."

"When I was a child, I played with you not because we had nice family ties, but because I thought your look on the outside greeted me, but then you expressed an ugly face to me behind my back,which made me think you was so cute ...Idiot, you certainly don't know me saw it all...

I was terrified when I discovered I liked you in ninth grade. From infancy through maturity, I had never been afraid, but that time I was so terrified that I couldn't sleep for a few days... I was frightened you'd be repulsed, afraid I couldn't help but tease you, afraid you'd find out later and abandon me..."

Besides, your acting abilities are so awful that you wrote everything on your face... So I took the initiative to act, and because we care about each other, I don't consider as bullying you..."

He recalled the kiss he discreetly imprinted on Su An's face while he was sleeping during class in ninth school, very lightly, almost without feeling.

But, in that instant, his heart pounded as he realized what suffering was.

He once wondered why he should confess, why they should be together. All of this would not have happened if he hadn't forcefully dragged Su An down. But he understood that if he went back, he would still do it since he didn't want to miss out on any chance to be with Su An.

He was always overly cocky, believing that he could manage anything as long as Su An was around, no matter how many sufferings and challenges he faced.

But, in that instant, his heart pounded as he realized what suffering was.

He once wondered why he should confess, why they should be together. All of this would not have happened if he hadn't forcefully dragged Su An down. But he understood that if he went back, he would still do it since he didn't want to miss out on any chance to be with Su An.

He was always overly cocky, believing that he could manage anything as long as Su An was around, no matter how many sufferings and challenges he faced.

He was always overly cocky, believing that he could manage anything as long as Su An was around, no matter how many sufferings and challenges he faced.

He was silent for a moment, his voice hoarse, like crying but also laughing: "You said You need me to live, but when I think of many decades and long years later without you by my side..."

"It's only my first year now, I'm almost out of control..."

Chapter end