Chapter 36 - Psyche

The gentle light of the lantern cast its warm glow over Aris. As I blinked through the sudden brightness, I saw the light slowly piercing through his shroud. I braced myself for the most horrid form I could imagine. Flaky green scales, black oily wings, or razor-sharp claws. I figured that if he could create the palace and all that was in it, he could easily make me feel delicate skin and curly, boyish hair.

So when the shroud began to fall away, revealing flesh rather than scales, sucked in a surprised gasp. The light pierced his shroud more and more, vealing all the features I'd felt under my fingertips as we'd flown together, ten together... kissed together.

His soft, delicate fingers rested easily across the chiseled muscles of his nest. Tucked behind his back were wings so white they seemed to glimmer. Before I could stop myself, I reached out and touched the tip of a satiny, white feather.

And suddenly, I knew.

Blood surged up my neck, pulsing and throbbing, threatening to pop a bessel if I couldn't get my temper under control. How dare he be the one!

I followed the light up his body as it cut through the darkness and evealed his face. Sure enough, it was the face I had no business not remembering, even if I couldn't see it with my eyes.

With his head turned to the side in sleep, I could see his perfectly- defined jaw line, his soft bow-shaped lips, his classically straight nose, and his long, dark eyelashes. Thick curls the color of dark amber fell carelessly around his smooth face.

My mind spun. How had this happened? Eros had hated me. I'd hated him.

Had he tricked me into these feelings, only to leave me a crumpled mess later? That had to be the plan. Aphrodite's. His. I didn't care. Attacking my heart felt like a worse betrayal than when I'd thought he was going to kill me soon.

And then an even more mind-boggling thought slipped into place. I almost killed Eros. Correction -- tried to kill Eros. You don't kill gods. But still.

When I realized what I'd almost done, I instinctively jerked back and the knife slipped from my grasp. It fell to the marble floor with a piercing series of clangs as it bounced several times before finally stopping. I stooped too quickly to pick up the knife -- as if picking it up could somehow take back the sound -- not bothering to think about the lantern I held in my other trembling hand.

As I leaned down, the light went out and blistering oil from the lantern sloshed over the sides. Our screams rang out through the night at the same time. I dropped the lantern and knife and howled from the painful burns on my fingers. Aris -- no, Eros, wailed too with the unmistakable sounds of pain.

I'd burned him.

In a flash of brilliant light, Eros illuminated himself. He hovered, wings lapping furiously, just over the bed.

"Is this what you wanted to see?" His voice thundered down at me.

"Actually, no," I snapped. "I can't believe you did this to me."

"Did this to you?" he yelled. His inner light surged brighter. "What exactly did I do except fall asleep?"
I folded my arms defensively across my chest. "You lied to me. You've been lying to me. Making me like you. Tricking me into kissing you." My stomach clenched at the thought. "I actually thought you… never mind."

"I can't believe you're so blind," he growled. "The only thing I lied to you about was my name."

I reached up to touch his arm, to pull him down to me so we could talk his through on equal footing, but he hovered just out of reach.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled. "I thought you were going to kill me. I didn't know.”

"Of course you didn't know,” he boomed, suddenly seeming angrier than ever. "That's been our deal from the start."

"Not our deal. Your deal," I shot back and climbed up onto the bed. If he wouldn't come down, I was going up. "All I've wanted since I got here was to see you. We wouldn't be having this problem right now if you hadn't been hiding."

"No, that's right," he said, trimming in his wings and dropping down to hook me right in the eyes, "we wouldn't, because we'd be dead. My mother would've taken us both out by now for defying her."

Covering my eyes with my hand, I sighed. "So what do we do now?"

"We? There is no we. I've got to get out of here before --"

When I uncovered my face to see what'd made him stop mid-sentence, I realized his eyes were locked on something on the floor.

The knife.

His eyes were wide and round. In them I read horror. Fury. Grief.

His nostrils flared as he cut his penetrating glare back to me. He clenched his teeth so hard that I could see the veins stand out on his jaw. "What. Were. You. Doing?" He punctuated each word with anger.

I couldn't answer him. I didn't even want to admit to myself what I'd planned, how could I tell him?

Eros grabbed my face with both his hands, forcing my eyes to meet his. "Tell me what you were doing," he hissed. "All of our secrets are out now, right?"

I shuddered under his cold stare, but tried to explain as best I could. "I was falling for you, just like the prophecy said, and it felt so right," I started.

"Save it for a night when I haven't caught you slinking around with a knife."

Jerking my head out of his grasp, I hissed, "Do you want my answer or not?"

He was silent.

"Okay, just hear me out. I didn't believe my sister at first. She said you were going to fatten me up to eat or something." I snorted. Of all the ridiculous ideas. How had I even thought that?

He was looking away now, and I needed him to believe I was being sincere. Although it was Eros and not Aris, if he'd been telling me the truth about everything else, he deserved to know what was going on. I slipped my hands into his. His touch still sent blissful shivers rippling over my skin even though we were fighting.

"I knew you'd never hurt me. I felt that." I squeezed harder. "But after everything that happened with Al--"

He cut me off, dropping my hands and stepping away as he did. "How many times was I supposed to say I loved you before you believed it?" I looked down guiltily. "Before you'd stop planning my murder?"

"You're making this way worse than it needs to me." I blinked and a wave of tears spilled down my face. "Can we talk about this please? I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry." Swallowing back the lump rising in my throat, I breathed, "I think I could've loved you."

Eros looked down into my eyes. Studying me, reading me. "I think you could've too."

His eyes moistened.
"You'll never know how much this pains me," he said. "Goodbye, Psyche."

His words were worse than having a spear run through my chest. That was it? After all the promises he made to love me forever and now he was telling me goodbye? The agony in my heart told me right then that what we'd had was more than a chance at love -- we'd actually had it.

And I'd literally been too blind to see anything but my own fear.

I opened my eyes to the sounds of his wings carrying him toward the window. I couldn't let him leave like this. This was not how things were supposed to end between us.

With a swiftness I never knew I had, I lunged from the bed and grabbed hold of his ankle. "You're not leaving," I told him. "Not like this."

Reaching down, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me up until I was crushed against his chest. His eyes were hard as we crossed the window threshold and floated into the garden.

“You're right. I can't leave you like this, can I?"

A tiny wave of hope swelled in me. Until he continued.

"Too much evidence." He dropped me into the dew-soaked grass and quickly soared out of reach.

"What?" I stammered.

"I'm sorry, Psyche, but you need to get away from the palace. Now."

And then the earth began to shake. The foundation to the palace buckled and gave way; the roof collapsed. A choking dust rose around me as I watched everything I'd come to know, to think of as my life in these past few days, reduced to rubble.

The sound of his heavy wing beats faded into the distance.

Chapter end