He only married me to show her that he already moved on Chapter 61 - sixty-one: The claws of the truth

I came home that night carrying the whole world on my shoulders. I've never felt so numb in my whole life.. not even when I found out that my father has his first family and that we're just his second, or when I learned that we don't have the same mother with my siblings, or not even when I realized that I can't have a whole family that I dreamt of like every other child wants to have.

The hurt and pain I felt when he threw the bomb in front of me, was incomparable to those I felt when I was still young.. when I was bullied and everyone treated me like some trash. Because with this one, it feels like a poison to my blood.. it kills me slowly but surely. It made me think of my worth, that no matter what I'll try to do... I can never be enough. I can't have him and I can never call him mine. He will never be mine.

My mind is screaming and my heart is wailing inside of my rib cage. And I hate it when my mind is telling me to stop loving him, but my stubborn and stupid heart can't let go of what she feels. I couldn't breathe and couldn't think straight with those past few days. 

I've been like a girl whom I was just watching in some drama series.. who looks happy on the outside, telling jokes, smiling, having a great time but they don't know.. I am dying inside. They don't realize that I'm hurt and tired, tired of not being good enough and tired to be just the second choice. 

But honestly, I don't want them to know my pain, I don't want them to think that I'm weak, and attention-seeking, so I'm keeping it all inside. Playing the role of being the best actress and acts like everything's okay and perfect.. especially in front of him, but cries every night while asking the stars and the whole universe how to stop and kill the pain.

It's been a week since he told me the shocking news and since then, I tried to distance myself from him just to think of what I really feel. If I am going to stay with him and help him with his plan or stay away like my friends always telling me?

There were lots of happenings with these past seven days. One of that happenings.. was when Noelle and Sandy tried to cheer me up, so they asked me to go to the mall and have some girly moments. But to my one of a shity day, I encountered the queen bitch inside of one of the boutique.

Flashback...

"Ohh.. hi, Madi."

I turned around to know who greeted me and my eyebrow automatically knows her way up.

"Are you shopping?" she asked me smirking.

I smiled and sneered. "No, I'm honestly trying to find some cure and ailments to someone's itchiness.. which I heard needs now to be scratch."

"Oh, Madi.. Madi.. Madi.. tsk.tsk.tsk." she said shaking her head. "Don't you think I don't know the truth?"

I crunched my eyebrows.. what truth is she talking about?

"That Gabriel only married you to make me jealous and get me back."

I laughed at her, although deep inside.. she pressed my already injured heart.

"And who told you that bullshit idea?" 

"It's not really important. What important is, I already know the truth.. so you can stay away now with my Gabi."

I can feel my temper slowly rising up to my head.

"And who are you to tell me that bullshit idea of yours? I am the wife! I am the legal wife here... so just keep your nonsense thoughts inside your shity mouth! And whoever told you that lies, for sure he or she has a huge envy with us to make such kind of thing!"

"Lies? Are you sure that's just lies? Because if it's true, why did Gabriel always following me where ever I go? He keeps on calling me and asking me if I'm okay.. like our old days? And why did he choose to stay with me than staying with you almost every night?"

I gulped and formed my two fists. I wanted to punch her shity face.. if she's not just pregnant,

"And may I add.. why aren't you got pregnant, if you're saying you're the real wife?"

I gasped with her last question.

"Why did Gabriel choose to give me his time.. and look at me... yeah, I'm not the wife.. but I'm the one who's pregnant." she proudly stated before she gave me her demonic laugh.

"Oh.. really, you're pregnant? Who can say if that's Gabriel's child or not?"

"What are you talking about?" her laugh died and started to glare at me. 

-'Now it's my turn to laugh at you.. bitch!'-

"Like I said.. who knows if that's Gabriel's baby? Knowing you.. the shity-itchy-bitch who opened your legs to everyone. What are you a canteen or a restaurant.. which is opened to those who wants to eat.. eat something fishy between your legs?"

"How dare you------" she tried to slap me like our first encounter in the restroom of their friends' event, but I caught her hand before it landed on my face.

"I told you, don't you ever put your filthy hand on my face. It's eww, and I don't have an alcohol here to wipe and kill your bacteria!"

She takes her hand away from my hold.

"And don't you ever give me an excuse, that you're pregnant.. for me not to slap your face and push you hard on the floor! Because I don't 'f.u.c.k.i.n.g care! Stay away from my husband!"

And then I walked towards the entrance of the boutique... but I remember one thing. I turned around and walked back to where she's standing.

"I'm just gonna say this once... Stay away from my husband! Back off unless you want your next period to come out from your nose! Oh your pregnant.. I forgot! Let's rephrase my sentence.. 'Back off unless you want your baby come out from your nose and not from your itchy p.u.s.s.y!"

She gasped with my last words, but I left her with that state and walked out of the boutique.

End of flashback...

And earlier, I received a call from Greg. At first, I was hesitant to answer it.. because knowing Greg.. he would just like Sandy and Noelle when he knows about what happened. But I decided to answer it in the end. He said he wants us to meet, some casual talk... eat somewhere and then go home, and I agreed.

I am now driving to the coffee shop that he said. And since Gabriel is nowhere to be found inside the house... I decided to leave a message outside of my bedroom door. I didn't bother to call or text him, 'cause I don't want him to know where I am going, I don't want him to reply and ask me who's I'm going to meet and what time I'm gonna go home.

I saw Greg sitting at the side of the coffee shop beside the glass panel. I smiled and walked towards him.

"Greg." 

He immediately stand when he noticed me in front of him.

"Madi." he smiled and pulled me into a tight hug. He also kissed my forehead which he always do since in college.

"Sit down." he said pulling the chair for me.

"Thank you."

"What do you want to eat?" he asked once he's already seated.

"No, I'm still full."

"Nope! You're going to eat or unless, I'm gonna order all the cakes that they sell and I'm gonna make you pay for all of it, including this one." 

I gasped with what he said and he even pointed the piece of cake in front of him.

"I hate you, Greg Anderson!" I said while chuckling.

"So, you better pick a good choice.. you're going to eat or you're going to pay for all of their cakes?" he raised his eyebrow.

"Why don't you just let me buy the whole store?"

"Oh.. that's a good idea! Wait, I'm gonna talk to the owner." he said standing up and I glared at him.

"Greg!"

"Why? I know you really can buy the whole store!" he sit back and laughed at me 

"Fine! I'm going to order now! Happy?" I playfully narrowed my eyes on him.

"Very happy! That's my girl!" 

I rolled my eyes when he winked at me.

When the waiter put my orders in front of me, I almost drool with the smell of chocolate oreo cake.

"Hmm.." I closed my eyes when my nose hit the smell of the delicious aroma of my chocolate latte and the cake in front of me.

I heard him chuckled at the other side of the table. "No.. I'm still full." I glared at him when he mimicked my words earlier.

But I just huffed and ignored him. I am in the middle of eating my oreo cake when he opened his mouth again.

"How are you, Madi?"

My mouth stopped munching the cake as I looked at him.

"I'm okay." I simply answered and take a sip of my latte.

"I can see that. I can clearly see that." he said seriously while leaning on his seat.

"Greg..."

"Don't you think I don't know the truth, Madi?"

"Greg.. I - I ------"

"Did he tell you the truth about Stacey?"

I sighed. I knew this would happen once I agree to meet him. And I don't have to ask him where did he get the news.

"Yes." 

I looked down and continued to eat. This is my favorite flavor so I'm not going to stop eating just because I'm upset about hearing the bitch's name.

"Then how did you accept the truth? Just like that?"

"Can I eat this first? Or you want to pay for all the cakes that they sell here? It's not a problem with me going home with a lot of cakes in my car."

And that worked. He stopped talking but started to laugh.

"Then go and eat that faster." he said shaking his head. I smiled but it doesn't reach my ears.

When I finished, he repeats his question while looking directly in my eyes.

"How did you accept the truth when he told you about Stacey's condition?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "The way you think I supposed to accept it. Be cool and relax."

"Madi?"

"Greg, I'm not in a position to question him about his plan. I'm just helping him. And I don't have the rights to ask him, because I'm just his fake wife." I take the glass of latte and tried to gulp the lump inside my throat. 

"Madi, has anyone told you that you're the most terrible actress of the century?"

"Ouch!" I faked my hurt outside... but I am now melting inside.

"You can lie to them, but not to me. Your eyes tell the exact pain you're going through."

I bite my lips and avoided his gaze.

"Madi, why don't you let go?"

I looked at him with tears forming around my eyes. I hate this topic and the question as well. 'why don't you let go?' 'why don't you leave him?'

"It's not easy, Greg."

"Even when you're hurting? Even he's now being unfair and causing you so much pain? Why don't you get out of your marriage, Madi? Think about yourself first."

"I - I don't know how, Greg."

He takes my hand on top of the table and put a white handkerchief on it. I smiled bitterly.

"You know what, it hurts to see the one you really love, loves someone else. I experienced that eight years ago.. until now."

"Greg...." I hold his hand as tears blurring my vision. I know what he's talking about. 

"But you know what it hurts more? When you found out that you were just their bridge to cross over to their loved ones."

A loud sob escaped from my throat. The pain of the truth is unbearable. The claws of it were digging inside my heart... ripping and tearing it apart. I wish I could turn the table and turn back the time. I wish I could teach my heart to love this man in front of me who always there for me, even he knows I am crying for another man and not for him.

Chapter end