Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi C448 The Solitary Chef

“Oh my~~ how delicious~ this is the Karaage thing? My, my, now I understand why everyone keeps talking about it.”

In front of Grandpa Gon was a pile of freshly fried Karaage mountain. This was the second Karaage mountain by the way. The first one, soy sauce-based, had already been crunched down at record speed.

“Fufu, isn't that right?”

I'm not sure why Fer was being so smug, since he did nothing to contribute…

““Aruji's Karaage is really yummy~~””

“”Yes, yes, it's delicious as always. Hm, but I think there's something different with today's Salt-based Karaage?””

“Oh, so you notice? As expected of Dorchan. In place of regular salt, I used lemon salt [9]. It's salt mixed with grated lemon peels. I thought I'd try something different.”

Lemon salt was something that I got hooked on for a little while. I even tried making it. It wasn't too difficult to make but, it did take up a lot of time. For today's recipe, I used store-bought lemon salt. It made a nice change to the standard Salt-Based Karaage.

“Some people like to squeeze a bit of lemon over their Karaage, but with the lemon flavour already in the salt, the crunchiness of the Karaage remains.”

I bit into one and hummed happily at the aroma of lemon and the juiciness of the chicken. Umm, yes, this is pretty good~~

“Is that so? Umu, very well, I shall taste it more carefully this time. Seconds, I want the lemon salt-based kind.”

“Seconds for me as well, Master,” said Grandpa Gon politely.

“”Sui too~~””

“Yes, yes,” I smiled bitterly to myself as I brought out large plates of Karaage from my [Item Box]. Fer, Grandpa Gon, and Sui dove into the huge piles of food immediately.

“”Goodness me, these people would eat anything. Looks like only I know how to recognise the subtle flavours,”” Dorchan sniffed.

Personally, I think Sui has a better palate, but she can't eat spicy food. As for the rest, so long as it's decent, they would eat them. [5a] 

[5b] “”Seconds, please!!””

And, that's my cue.

After everyone was fully stuffed with Karaage, we all settled down with our beverage of choice. Fer, Grandpa Gon, Dorchan and Sui enjoyed fizzy cola while I had some tea.

“Right,” I said, once the after-dinner drinks session was over, “I'm going for a bath. Dorchan, did you stop the hot water?”

I had tasked Dorchan to turn off the hot water after the tub was full. I also gave him some bath salts.

““Yup! It's all full. I've also put in the bath salts.””

[8]

“Nice, shall we go?” As I spoke, I casually made my way to stand in front of Fer. “Hold it right there.”

“Umu, w-what is it?”

“Don't you umu at me. Do you think I'm going to let you get away just like that?”

Fer scowled.

“We just came back from the dungeon. A very dirty, dusty and nasty dungeon full of dirt, bugs and things. The last time we came out, you refused to bathe because 'we had to go back anyway'. Well, that excuse doesn't fly now. We've already cleared the dungeon. As for you…”

I went over to Grandpa Gon's side and run a finger across the scales. Then I glared at my finger.

“As expected, Grandpa Gon needs a bath too.”

“A bath? What's that?”

“Why don't you come and find out? And Fer, don't you dare run away!

“Woah, I mean, I was just here earlier, but… this place is really, really wide~~”

I was now standing inside the super luxurious bathroom of this super luxurious mansion that might as well be a palace. [8a] The ginormous bath was the main reason why I got this ridiculous place. The person in charge told me that the nobleman who commissioned this place loved baths and I rented this place with great expectations.

All of which was surpassed!

“So, what's this bath thing? Are we going to wash?”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, there's a great difference between washing and a proper soak, you know? See that pool over there? It's all hot water. We're going to soak ourselves there, but only after we're clean.”

“”Hot bath~~!””

““Hyaho, it's been such a long time since our last bath!””

“Stop! What did I say about cleaning ourselves earlier?”

““Ye~es~””

“Tch, whatever. Fine.””

“Hmm, since you've already bathed last time we're out of the dungeon… Sui's self-cleaning and Dorchan's been… less active, I think this much is fine.” I scooped some hot water out of the pool with a bucket and pour it over Dorchan and Sui.

“Right, off you go.”

“”Yay~~””

“”Hyahoo!!””

Splish splash

[5c] 

“Ah, Sui, could you help me with Fer?”

“”Yes, Aruji~~””

Sui extended a tentacle and hot water showered over Fer.

“I'll get to you next, Grandpa Gon,” I said as I thoroughly wet Fer, preparing to scrub him up with a new dog shampoo I had gotten from the drugstore. “I'm going to rub the shampoo in now.”

“Whatever, do it quickly.”

[5c] “Wait, don't tell me the Great Fenrir is afraid of a little water?” Grandpa Gon began to laugh.

“Who's afraid of anything? I just don't like it,” Fer grumbled.

“Yes, yes, I get it, I'm going to scrub harder now.”

“Hmm, be sure to get my neck and chest well.”

“Yeah, yeah,” for someone who hates being washed, he sure has lots of opinions about it.

[5c] Finally, “Sui, more water, please. Wash the bubbles off Fer.”

“”Okay~””

Once the bubbles were gone, Fer started to shiver. I belatedly caught on and cried, “Wait, stop, Fer!!”

[5c] It was too late, he had already started shaking water and loose fur all over the place. The blasted Fenrir even shook all four feet before stepping out of the bathroom.

“Damn that legendary thing…”

“Fuhahahaha, what a bringer of chaos, eh? Master?”

“Grandpa Gon, why are you still so clean?”

“Naturally, I blocked his petty little attack with magic.”

“Magic? Like a barrier magic?”

“That's right,”

“Couldn't you have protected me too?”

“Eh, you didn't ask me to.”

This old geezer…

Deciding not to pursue that argument, I pour some hot water over my head to get rid of the loose fur and tackled my next project.

“Sui, shower Grandpa Gon, will you? And Dorchan, prepare more hot water, I think we're going to need it.”

“”Okay~””

“”Ou!!””

Sui was a veteran at controlling the shower now, so I don't have to direct her. As Grandpa Gon was being wetted through, I perused my collection of body soaps.

“I guess, we could go with some standard body soap first and see how it goes, but more than that, this will be my secret weapon of the day!”

This being a deck brush. 

“Hm? What's that thing?” asked Grandpa Gon.

There was no way I'm going to tell him that I'm going to wash him using a floor scrubber. Instead, I said, “It's for this!” and proceeded to scrub his back with it.

I had already poured the soap into a bucket half filled with warm water and dipped the brush into it from time to time and scrubbing Grandpa Gon's scales.

“Oohh~ This feels really good~”

“Ugh, the foam is turning black, when was the last time you wash?”

“Hmm, can't remember. Oh, apply a little more force, please.”

“Got it,” Well, considering the size of his arms and the way he was built, even if he did take regular showers, there are certain bits that are difficult to clean…

Scrub, scrub, scrub…

The back, the creases and the tail were all scrubbed.

I was exerting so much force that my towel fell off. However, I was so into the job that I just ignored it.

Scrub, scrub, scrub…

Finally, I asked Sui to rinse him off.

I glanced at the grey bubbles and the bucket of black water. In the end, I tipped out the bucket of black soapy water and held up my brush again. “Sui, keep spraying the water. Grandpa Gon, I'm going to brush you one last time.”

Scrub, scrub, scrub…

Finally, no more bubbles came off the dragon and I sighed.

“So, can I get into the water now?” Grandpa Gon was staring longingly at the steamy water where Sui and Dorchan were splashing about.

“Sure, but do it slowly or- hey! I said slowly!”

To be fair, he did step into the large tub slowly, but he was so enormous that water just flowed out in all directions. Luckily, we had already used nearly a quarter of it to rinse off Grandpa Gon or I would have been swept off my feet.

“Uuu~~~ so this is a bath, how lovely~~”

I was clutching Sui and Dorchan in my arms, they have both been swept out by the overflow. Luckily, both found it more exciting than worrying.

Ah, that reminds me, I would have to get a bigger tub for the Carelina house, or get someone to expand it somehow…

Various discrete thoughts floated through my mind as I soaked in the tub with three out of four familiars. Maybe it's a good thing that Fer didn't like soaking in a tub…

“”Hey, Master's Karaage is especially delicious today. Did you do something different?””

“”Aruji's food is always delicious~~””

““Right, right, if I have to choose, I'd say getting to eat delicious food in the morning is one of the great pleasures of travelling with Master~””

“Ho~~ delicious morning meals? Well, well, looks like my decision to become one of Master's familiars proves to have more and more benefits.”

“By delicious, you mean meat, don't you?” I said dryly. “Personally, I think it's ridiculous to have meat three times a day, but that's up to you.”

For mornings, I prefer to have something plain with pickles and maybe a simple soup. Speaking of which, “You say that the Karaage tasted better today? Hmm, actually, I did feel that I was able to cook more food in a shorter time than usual. I wonder, is that an actual thing or just my imagination…?”

“Did you raise your level?” asked Grandpa Gon.

“”No way,“” Dorchan sniggered. “”The only work Master did this time was picking up Drop items.””

“Well, Dorchan's right. I haven't killed anything indirectly either…”

“Hmm, in that case, perhaps you've earned a new title? Those could greatly boost one's ability too,” said Grandpa Gon.

“What's a title?”

“Hmm, hmm, I'm not too sure. I've only seen it once. [10] Most Adventurers who saw me would just run away. But there's this one fellow. He was just as tiny and annoying as the rest, but he has guts. The little bean called me an 'Evil Dragon' or something and declared that it was 'His Destiny' to kill me.

[10] It was a little amusing, so I waited to see what would happen. Well, the attack power stung a little, which was pretty impressive. So I said to him, 'You are puny and I praise you for daring to face this Ancient Dragon. Such guts is rare, so I shall only flick you away and not crush you to smush.' So, I flicked the puny fellow. He was not at all happy about it and started shouting things like: I'm a hero! I'm the strongest! Why won't my title work against you! It was getting really annoying so I just flew away from that little bug.”

“… …” I have no idea whether to laugh at this absurd story or not. [11] I mean, I arrived here as an outlier along with three teenage high schooler heroes. Even so, I vaguely remember that 'Hero' was their occupation?

How is a title different from an occupation?

[5d]

“I guess, I should try checking my Status.

[Name] Mukoda (Tsuyoshi Mukoda) 

[Age] 27 

[Race] Mostly Human 

[Title] Solitary Chef 

[Occupation] Cook Adventurer? Guy Caught up in the Summoning Spell

[Level] 90

[Physical Strength] 508

[Magic Power] 499

[Attack Power] 495

[Defence Power] 480

[Agility] 394

[Skills] Appraisal, Item Box, Fire, Magic, Earth

[Skill] Appraisal Item Box Fire Magic Earth Magic Absolute Defence Double Experience Points Earned

<> Fenrir Huge Slime Pixie Dragon Ancient Dragon (300 years only)

[Unique Skill] Net Super 

<< Tenant >> Fujiya Liquor Shop Tanaka Matsumura Kiyomi

[Blessing]

Blessing of the Wind Goddess Ninril (small)

Blessing of the Fire Goddess Agni (small) 

Blessing of the Earth Goddess Kishar (small) 

Blessing of the God of Creation Demiurge (small)

“Solitary… Chef?”

What? What's this about being a Solitary Chef? Why is it a title?

I hesitantly poked the tab for 'Solitary Chef' and a description popped up.

[Solitary Chef – This title is granted only to those who have continuously cook large amounts of delicious food on their own. A cook's efficiency is raised to chef level and the one who bears this title would be faster and better at cooking.]

Wow! Faster cooking? Sign me up! Especially now that I have to cook for four gluttons. 

… do you really believe I'm going to say all that cheerfully?!

Solitary? Why solitary?!

Also, why did Cook come before Adventurer? Huh? Also, what's with the '?' that comes after Adventurer? Are you calling my identity as an Adventurer into question?!

I have the Adventurers Guild Card to prove my identity, you know?!

“Nooo!!! What's with this title… I don't want it at all!!!”

My wail of despair echoed throughout the bathroom.

[Gumihou: Well, I won't mind having that title…]

[1] Structural Change: Combine 2 paragraphs

[2] Structural Change: Combine 3 paragraphs

[3] Structural Change: Combine paragraph & dialogue

[4] Structural Change: Change passive sentence to dialogue

[5] Delete Repetitive or Pointless Information… starting to delete pointless scenes now

[a] Delete meandering thoughts about the familiars' non-existing 'gourmet palate'

[b] Delete repetitive 'delicious, yum, seconds!!'

[c] Delete repetitive 'bath is nice' and 'bath is awful'

[d] Deleted aimless rumination that went nowhere re 'title'

[6] Additional Information for Aesthetic Purpose

[7] Add Dialogue Tag

[8] Creative License – Adjust confrontation with Fer over bath time

[a] Adjust why they got this mansion with the 'the nobleman likes bath' information

[9] Lemon Salt – Steps to make it, lol. This one is a little complicated, but you can make some immediately with lemon zest and a little salt.

www.wikihow.com/Make-Lemon-Salt

[10] Properly present Grandpa Gon's explanation about 'Title'

[11] Add detail re Mukouda's past encounter with 'Heroes', you know, the ones he arrived with way back when?

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Chapter end