Kyou kara Ma no Tsuku Jiyuugyou! Vol 7 Chapter 5

KKM Novel 7, Chapter 5

Can Greta be any more adorable?  Seriously.

So anyway, I decided to just keep Shinzoku as Shinzoku and define the term in the text because any name I came up with sounded weird ^-^;;

There was another name in this chapter different from the Chinese > English version:

Donierson > East Nilzon

Oh, and once again I got the picture for this chapter from Portrait of a Demon King.

      Poison Lady Anissina and the ‘Corsit’ of Instinct (1)

      Watch out!  The greasy fingers of her male boss are on Poison Lady Anissina’s back!  This is ‘sekshual harasmint’!

      “Hey Anissina, what’s a ‘corsit’?”

      “Hm, then what’s ‘sekshual harasmint’?”

      “Who’s that!?  A guy!?” Finding an opportunity to use the comeback she had learned, the child swung her feet delightedly.

      “I know.”

      “But what sort of thing is ‘sekshual harasmint’?”

      The first lesson in sex education.

      However, with the aforementioned parents (the unique couple of His Majesty and the Spoiled Prince) and the educator (who is most likely Real Günter while she is in this kingdom) in the situations they were now in, it is likely impossible for a proper sex education to be coordinated.  On the contrary, it was not unthinkable that that lot would try and tell a happy fairytale about babies being carried by flying skeletons and being thrown into cabbage patches.  It is impossible to grow once you have false knowledge.

      “To start off, I will explain about the stamens and pistils of rafflesia.”

      “I know about that already.  Mr. Shiny and his wife already told me how children are born.”

      “That’s not what I meant.  I wanted to know what kind of things become that.  Is it ‘harasmint’ when Yuuri gives me a biiiiig hug?  It makes me happy, though.”

      “Then what about when Wolf gives Yuuri a biiiig hug?”

      “Then what about when Wolf teases Yuuri and calls him a wimp?”

      ‘L’ is a no-no. (5)

      “That is a capture.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.”

      “Ahhhhhhhhh!”

      “His Highness!  His Highness is-----!”

      “I’M TELLING YOU NOT TO SCREAM ABOUT IT!”

      “Spring has come.”

------

(2)    Instinct is ‘Honnou’ and Desires is ‘Bonnou.’

(4)    More puns.  In Japanese conversation, it’s not uncommon to say someone’s name instead of ‘you.’  Anissina actually says ‘When our beloved Majesty returns, he will certainly be disappointed if Greta were completely off track.’  Greta in Japanese phonology becomes ‘Gureta.’ The word (+ conjugation) for ‘to go off track’ Anissina uses here is ‘gureteitara’ so it’s a small joke.  Extra info: ‘Gureta’ by itself is the past form of the verb.

*.*.*.*.*

      Most of the people’s hair was light brown with the occasional golden brown and chestnut mixed in.  Just like the emissaries sent to Caloria, the soldiers all had long hair flowing in the wind.

      Ever since Flynn had suffered the sexist attitudes of the Shimaron coast guards who told her that they would not allow her to travel the seas without a man to claim responsibility for her, she had secluded herself in her room.  However, what shocked her even more was that I resolved the troublesome situation by appearing in disguise with Norman Gilbit’s mask.

      Simply because the one earnestly thinking about her country is a woman, she’s laughed at and rejected, but with just one idiotic phrase like that from a man we get let right through.

      “Flynn, don’t pay any attention to that ridiculous law.  It’s time to-”

      “… Did you just hide something?”

      Despite what she just said, she already has her jacket on.  None of her luggage is open either.  She’s pushing the door closed with all her strength, but over her shoulder I see a bulge under the bed sheet she threw.

      “I’m not hiding anyone.  There’s no one here!”

      “KYA!  No!  It’s not my boyfriend!”

      “Who’s a monkey!?”

      Thinned by over-washing, the sheets rose up in a showy fashion with a narration by Sadatomo Matsudaira. (2)

      “Huh?”

      Why a sheep!?  Why T-Zou!?

      Giving up on trying to push me out, Flynn reluctantly let go of the doorknob.  As if staying still was pushing her to the limit, the ball of 100% Wool jumped up and down on the bed.  Easily finding me, she rushed at me from a dangerous angle.

      “If I left her in Caloria, what would we do if she was mistaken for food…”

      This sheep who was brown only on the T-Zone of her face was rubbing her face and horns on my stomach.  She’s very excited.

      “Nmonmonmonmonmoshkashteeeeee!”

      “That’s ridiculous.  This is ‘Use your knowledge, speed and skill to win!  The World’s Best Fighter Tournament’ isn’t it?  Where is there any place to squeeze in a sheep?  Now-”

      “-were to be of use… let’s see, ah, it would only be her being warm if we slept outside?”

      “But wha-”

      “-the final match is a sheep show?  What will you do then?  You won’t find a valiant and fluffy girl like this just anywhere.”

      Thrusting my fingers into the high-class furball, I scratch behind her ears.  There’s no way that the last event in an international tournament that occurs once every four years is going to be a livestock show.  What’s strange is that Flynn, a human from Caloria, did not know the details of the tournament.  Even though Caloria is a territory of Small Shimaron it has the qualifications to enter so it wouldn’t be strange if she knew what sorts of contests are involved.

      “Of course not!  Women and children are not allowed in the arena.  If they are found there they are put to death.  If you’re not a… natural-born Shimaron citizen you can’t watch the finals.”

      I suddenly had a mental image.  A stadium filled to capacity and overflowing with spectators, all of which are handsome adult men.  Resounding and bold cheers with indecent jeers and jokes mixed in.  The winner is embraced by an older man and receives his blessings, the loser is dragged from the stadium by another older man.  There are angry roars following him out and rotten eggs are thrown at him.

      “According to rumor, those who make it to the finals fight naked with only their bodies as weapons, their tempered bodies clash together, the glistening sweat and all sorts of bodily fluids fly through the air all the way to the spectator seats-”

      This is bad.  Really bad.

      In the first place, the bodies of baseball players are fundamentally different compared to other sports, especially martial arts.  Muscles like Kiyohara has are the exception and there are a surprising amount of players with soft body types.  Wait a minute, if we’re talking about a face like Matsui’s then he might win.  But hold up, it’ll probably take at least five more years for me to get a body like Kazuo. (3)

      “Are you okay?  Are you going to start doing sit-ups?”

      “What are the two of you doing alone tog-… What’s wrong Yuuri?  Your eyebrows are all wimpy,” Wolfram says as he rushes in.  For a moment he forgets his anger.

      As he watched me mutter dazedly, the pretty boy boasted proudly – even though he was supposed to be all spoiled and high-strung.

      Everyone at the arena will… bleagh!

      “Um, I’m sure this isn’t the case, but do you really intend to go all the way to the finals..?” Flynn nervously interjects as she pets T-Zou.

      It means something to participate in the Olympics, but there is a greater meaning in victory in The World’s Strongest.

(2)    This is a joke involving the previous sentence.  Sadatomo Matsudaira is an announcer for the public broadcasting network, NHK.  He was the host for a show that ran from 2000-2007 called ‘Sono Toki Rekishi ga Ugoita’ which means ‘Then, history moved.’

[Spoiler to pics]
 

*.*.*.*.*

      We found an adequate spot in the middle of the crowded harbor and just barely managed to dock The Red Starfish.  According to the rules of the sea, we flew this country’s flag in a conspicuous location.  Nevertheless, bright red ships seem to be rare so we were immediately identified as foreigners.

      "Your Majesty, His Excellency Gwendal instructed me to give this to you…”

      I untie the ribbon with a little mascot figure attached and open the ridiculously meticulous wrapping.  Inside was a pair of winter sports goggles and a cap that Lord von Voltaire had hand-made.  This was definitely knitted by hand.  Definitely.The tag just says ‘Made’.

      “If I may be so bold, Your Majesty’s hair is of an exceedingly noble color so…”

      No wonder I thought it looked familiar.  On both sides of the reddish brown knit, adorable bear ears were sticking out.  It’s an indispensible item for hatching bearbees, the number one rare animal that you want to hug and snuggle in bed with.

      It’d be better to just stay as the masked man.

      “You’re right!  You’re a genius, Muraken!  That’s The Great Sage for you.”

      I pull the cap with the ears on the inside down to my eyebrows and hide my eyes with the winter goggles.  Now if I just had a mask that covered my mouth I’d totally feel pumped up to take part in the Winter Olympics.

      And it’s all for nothing.

      “You’d think that foreigners wouldn’t be so unusual for an international port like this.”

      Flynn took in the sight of the crazily yelling people and narrowed her eyes.

      There is hatred and ridicule in the crowd.  At the same time, the contempt they have for their vassal nations is rearing its head.

      “Seriously.  If only every international tournament was cheerful.  Okay, we should probably take care of our entries as soon as possible.  It’d be suspicious moving around with a bunch of people so just Gurrier and Captain Sizemore should be fine for bodyguards,” said Murata.

      In spite of the guards holding the crowd back, the angry voices from the people do not stop.  Maybe they’re insults specific to this place because I absolutely do not understand any of it.  Or rather, when I try to consciously focus on the words to understand them, it all sounds like a buzzing in my ears.  Kind of like when I ruptured my eardrum.  They are definitely human voices, but they sound like tens of thousands of bees swarming in my brain.

      Swallowing an unnatural amount of saliva, I try to fool myself out of my discomfort for a moment.

      “This is cool.  It’s totally like we’re the visiting team.  Where are the elementary school kids to cheer on Caloria?”

      Now that he mentions it, their pinkies are sticking straight up on the fists they’re waving in the air.

      “In a way they’re challenging us to a fight.”

      There was a small shriek behind us.  Someone had grabbed Flynn’s blonde hair.

      “I’m fine, I’m fine.  He stopped them.”

      It seems that not even the Big Shimaron citizens would think to lay their hands on Josak or Sizemore.  Strangely enough, even T-Zou was successfully keeping the hands away by wildly snorting and growling threateningly.  When I tried growling as well… I got depressed because I looked like a weirdo.

      “We only have the afternoon left so we should go register first.  Hey,” the stout-hearted Calorian woman says as she lowers her voice and grabs my sleeve.  “… We may need Norman Gilbit again.  If so-”

      “Thank you.”

      There’s a group of housewives chatting on a street corner, squealing children running around, old men reading newspapers at a café-like shop, groups of men laughing at bars.  At first glance, the men were mostly soldiers and the women were mostly workers.  The people carrying the food they just bought are women and the sellers are also women.  Everyone has soft, brown hair and their eyes, although the darkness varied, are all brown as well.

      “Happy birth...”

      “For the honor of the great kingdom of Shimaron, We will provide.  The King for the citizens.  God for the King.”

      While Flynn and Sizemore were submitting the registration papers, we went near the spraying water to get some fresh air.  It would be nice if the buzzing in my ears and the light nausea I’ve felt since disembarking would ease up a bit.  Then, I saw two children sitting in a gazebo on the other side of the square.

      “…. Got a chill.”

      However, I can’t tear my gaze away from the gazebo without windows or walls.  There is a pure-white and very pale curtain of light spreading around the two children.  Or else the boys – or girls – are emitting something like phosphorescence from their bodies and hair.  I can’t tell from this distance.

      The two of them raised their right wrists at the same time and beckoned me over.  The part of my brain that makes me suspicious won’t work correctly.  I can’t even wonder why they’re calling me or if the pain in my chest is love.

      At that moment, a shrill electronic noise sounds and my feet stop as I come back to myself.

      It wasn’t the ringtone on my cell phone, but my brave travelling companion the digital-analog G-shock.  It hasn’t been that long since I started using it, but this is the first time it malfunctioned and the alarm when off at this time of day.

      “… Hm… huh!?  Eh, um, what!?”

      “Where?  To those twins over there…”

      “… It would be best not to get involved with them,” Wolfram said as he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand.  He’s sweating in this cold weather.  Now that I think about it, there’s a cold sweat running down my own back.  When I automatically glance at Murata’s face, he once again has a serious expression.

      “Wh-why?  They’re just completely normal girls a little older than Greta… or maybe not…”

      Like Mr. Spock, their bangs are longest in the middle of their forehead instead of on the sides and their large, wide-set eyes are emphasizing their childish charm. When I look closely, their irises are a deep gold with flecks of green.  That’s far more unusual than black.

      They’re inhuman in every way.

      Their limbs are thin and flexible and they have on large, unbecoming shoes.

      But even so, it’s a different type of beautiful compared to the demons with Lady Cecilie, The Pheromone Beauty, as representative.  Even when faced with the super beauty Günter, I had never broken out into a cold sweat as someone with an average face and figure.  However, just by looking at these girls, my throat is closing up.

      “This is the first time I’ve seen one, but are they by chance elves?”

      “Shibuya, you play too many video games.  Elves are imaginary creatures.”

      Even though this is a world with kappa and fish people, elves are imaginary creatures!?

      “If you look closely, their ears aren’t pointed.  If you think for a moment it’s obvious.  Elves in RPGs or fantasy stories are better than humans in every way.  If that sort of species existed, the world would be controlled by them.”

      It seems the former super-elite from The Great Demon Kingdom could not simply let that comment pass.

      “Yeah, those girls are definitely not human.  If I had to guess, I’d say they’re Shin-”

      “Big brother!”

      After staring them in the eyes for three seconds, I hurriedly turn back into the discussion huddle.

      And in a cutesy way you could tack a heart on the end of.  Who!?  Who is the big brother!?  The eldest son of the Murata family speaks first.

      “I only have one older brother.”

      “Don’t say something scary like that!  First of all, I’m cosplaying as a convenience store robber with goggles on.  Like a sibling separated at birth would recognize me?  And what about you?  Maybe Lady Celi got a new lover and… hey, you know she said that she wanted a daughter.”

      The youngest son was at a loss for words.

      “Big brothers!”

      “Th-they just said ‘big brothers’!”

      “Being suddenly called ‘big brother’ by a beautiful young girl in a foreign land…”  I’ve heard of situations like this before. “I got it!  They’re little sister characters!  But that set up is for getting a bunch of little sisters, not for suddenly getting three big brothers… ah.”

      “Don’t say such infuriating things.  There’s no way that something unrealistic like that would happen,” says Wolfram.

      “… Well excuse me…”

      The calmest one was Josak who apparently has no interest in the little sister type.  They probably have patient personalities because the two girls are still waving at us.

      Their voices and timing are identical and it’s like only one person is talking.

      Wolfram whispers ‘They’re Shinzoku, the people of heaven.  You had better not get involved with them’ in my ear.  By ‘people of heaven’ does he mean gods?  Then… those girls are gods?  It seems that two female-shaped gods are taking a rest in a public square in this land of Big Shimaron.  If we went to a sushi place nearby, the shopboy’s god will definitely be there.  Even though I’m a baseball brat without the slightest shred of religious piety, my speech turns formal when standing before a god. (3)

      The twin gods giggled.  And then, they spoke in a peculiar way.

      “Hm?  As in, do I believe in it?”

      “Ow-”

      “The World’s Strongest?”

      After that, the two of them continue in concert.  Victory?  Possible?  Hope?

      “Too bad.”

      “Big brothers, will get injured.”

      The twins quite cheerfully turn to look at each other and keep laughing.  They’re definitely divine and beautiful, but… I can’t think of a word to describe it.  Even if I furrow my brows and think really hard, I can’t make up for my limited vocabulary.  It’s like they’re finding the misfortune of others amusing or like they don’t think of people as people or something along those lines.

      ‘I’m found out,’ I thought.

      “K-k-king!?  I’m definitely not a home-run batter!  Although if you can tell someone’s batting statistics just by looking at their face and thumb I absolutely want you to become my team’s batting coach!”

      I panic and try to pull back my thumb, but I’m being held with unexpectedly powerful strength.  I can’t pull free.

      “You.”

      The former Crown Prince falters for a moment after being gazed at by the other god.  In order to say that he isn’t someone who would obey someone else, I open my mouth but the twins beat me to it.

      “Even though your soul was exceedingly noble before this life and before the last.”

      I notice his bloodless face.  The pure-blooded demon from a famous noble family, the son of the previous king, is glaring murderously at the twins.  But in his profile, I see an emotion different than anger.  He probably remembered the horrible way he met me.

      The sweat I’ve been building up flows down my back in a single line.  It seems these twins who are so beautiful they give me the chills aren’t actually gods.

      “Right.  Your past lives, we can see them.”

      I’m basically just a muscle head so I don’t have the slightest bit of persuasive power.  It’s times like these that the Twin Black Great Sage comes in handy.  Please resolve this issue.

      After humming a verse of El Bimbo, Murata takes 2, 3 steps forward.  Damn it, he’s in Tokyo Magic Robinson Mode.

      Wondering why the BGM didn’t stop, I notice that Josak has continued whistling it.  It was out of tune due to him not being overly familiar with the song and it had thus become strangely upbeat.

      “… You.”

      “Scholar?

      “… Scribe?”

      The girls’ transparent white skin flushes red like paint was spilled on them.  The hand grasping mine was trembling.  Facing their first defeat must be quite mortifying.

      It happened when the beautiful twins clenched their fists and looked like they were about to let loose a string of unseemly insults.  From the other side of the spray of the water fountain, a man in a foreign country’s military outfit appeared.

      It was a harsh voice more mature than his age that I would never be able to forget even if I tried.

      “Maxine!”

      The worst man in Small Shimaron.

      Once again, what Murata chooses to comment on is slightly off the mark.

(2)    Lifting your pinky is a hand signal that means girlfriend.  Extra info: The thumb means boyfriend.

(4)    Osugi and Piiko are actors who are twin brothers.   As for Freddy and Jason… I’m pretty sure that Freddy vs. Jason and their respective franchises were released worldwide, but just in case, Freddy and Jason are horror movie villains who ended up mortal enemies XD

Chapter end