Chapter 1

"Tina is going to sing this song for you, my beloved big brother, so I want you to listen to it!"

On the TV display, a 2D Bishoujo[1] was saying cute lines with a blushing face. Immediately after that line, a light melody started playing.

"Hey, when will this get interesting?"

The Bishoujo beside me twirled her hair around her finger in boredom as she watched the moving pictures from the corner of her eye.

"You were the one who said you wanted to watch it, so stop playing with your hair and pay attention to it! If you don't pay attention, you're going to miss an important scene!"

The anime had been running on the TV display for merely fifteen minutes.

"How can such an anime, with just children singing and dancing, have any important scenes?"

Said the Bishoujo beside me as she languidly played with her hair...... though it's just a nice-sounding term if I call her one. With her overly-luxurious fake eyelashes, thick makeup, brightly permed hair and flashy nails ---

the female of the human species, known as Gyaru[2], stood there. Her appearance was a complete mismatch with the transformation idol anime aimed at little girls, "Lovely Idol Tinker ☆ Tina", that was currently running on the TV screen.

"Haah ~...... you're the one who told me that Suzuki-kun is into this anime, so I went to rent it from TSUTAYA[3], but what does Suzuki-kun find interesting about this anime?"

"Say that only after you've at least finished one full episode."

We were in the AV room and it was after school hours.

Since this was the only place we could watch a DVD, I, Kashiwada Naoki, and the Gyaru in front of me...... Koigasaki Momo, were watching a rented anime DVD here without even getting permission from the school.

"It's been incredibly boring for the past fifteen minutes. Hey, can you explain what's the appeal of this anime? Summarize it in thirty seconds. Since you're an Otaku[4], you should be able to do that, right?"

"No, it's not like I'm a Lolicon[5], so I can't tell what's so appealing about this anime...... Weren't you the one who didn't want to watch this alone and forced me to watch it with you!"

"Eh, hey, are you insinuating that Suzuki-kun is a Lolicon? Can you please seriously stop that kind of allegation!"

"I'm not insinuating, the fact is, he is a Lolic...... gweh."

I felt my neck getting constricted from my necktie, which was tightening from a strong tug.

"Huh!? What did you just say!?"

After getting my breath back, I could see some students passing by outside the door window. Furthermore, it seemed like they were looking at us.

"Geh! Do people actually pass by here! Don't tell me they can see us watching anime from outside......? If they realize that I'm watching an anime after school, won't my Otaku secret get found out!?"

Upon my clamoring, Koigasaki suddenly pressed the 'Stop' button and stopped the DVD.

"Aah, this is really boring. Can't be bothered with it."

She took out the DVD and put it back in its case.

Saved......! With this, my Otaku secret is safe......

If I got found out here, then all the trouble I took to become a closet Otaku ever since entering high school would go down the drain.

Koigasaki must have seen how upset I was and gave up watching for my sake. My, doesn't she have some unexpected good points?

As I was feeling a brief moment of relief,

"Hey, Koigasaki...... what's that......"

Koigasaki took out another DVD from her bag.

"I also rented this from TSUTAYA. This is an anime that both you and Suzuki-kun are hooked on, right? Didn't you help me ask him about it? You can be quite useful at times. This better be interesting, though!"

My jaw dropped upon seeing the anime title on the case of that DVD.

"Stop! Just not that anime! I mean, you should at least watch this at home!"

"If I watch this at home, it'll be terrible if my family suddenly walks in on me, so that's impossible."

"It's even worse if you watch this in school, duh!"

At the end of my futile attempts to stop her, the anime started playing on the TV screen.

Right at the outset, a bunch of beautiful girls appeared on the screen.

"Wh-What's this......"

Koigasaki froze instantly as she looked at the screen.

This anime could be said to be challenging the limits of a Free-To-Air channel, a turn-on, erotic late night anime. On top of that, the DVD was a revised edition that was even more erotic to the extreme.

The childish girly anime earlier was many times more preferable.

"What's this! Are you an idiot!? Otakus are creepy! No, not just creepy, but gross! To get into this kind of anime...... I seriously can't believe you Otakus!"

With her face beet-red, Koigasaki threw the remote control, makeup pouch, and drink carton pack in her hands at me.

"Ouch! What the hell are you doing! Wait, turn the thing off, turn it off!"

While enduring the attacks from Koigasaki, I frantically pressed the 'Stop' button on the remote control and stopped the anime.

"Jeez, this is really horrible! I didn't intend to rent this kind of anime......"

"Who's the horrible one, you hysterical woman! It seems really impossible for you to become an Otaku if you react so repulsed from an anime like this!"

I suddenly snapped and threw my rage on Koigasaki.

"What's that, why did you say it's impossible......?"

Koigasaki's expression contorted suddenly on hearing my words.

"Just be more cooperative! Didn't you say that I shall help you become a Riajuu[6], and that you'll help me become an Otaku so I can get closer to Suzuki-kun!? We have an agreement, right!? Don't you dare tell me you've forgotten about it!"

That's right, we are indeed bonded by such an agreement.

Aah, how did things turn out this way......

Even though I just wanted to enjoy my peaceful high school life......

And if luck is on my side, I hoped to get a cute, conservative girlfriend and become a Riajuu.

But instead...... nobody could have imagined that my high school life would be turned upside down by this violent, Sweet(LOL)[7] Gyaru.

Everything started after I met this girl, when my high school life ended up getting messed up......

 

Translator's Notes and References & OTARIA Glossary Jump up↑ Bishoujo: Literally "beautiful young girl". See here for more information. I left this untranslated because translating it to "beautiful/pretty young girl" is cumbersome, especially when it's used numerous times throughout the series. Moreover, it's a term used in many Otaku discussions throughout the series, and repeatedly translating "Bishoujo xxx" to "beautiful young girl games/types/anime/blah-blah-blah" makes it even more cumbersome.

  Jump up↑ TSUTAYA: A chain of rental shops and bookstores. Here's how the online store looks like.

  Jump up↑ Lolicon: A person who has a lolita complex, that is, who finds young girls or females with child-like bodies sexually desirable. Of course, among Otakus, this usually applies to only 2D characters. See here for more information.

  Jump up↑ Sweet(LOL): Essentially a transliteration of the internet slang, スイーツ（笑）. It might be used without the (LOL). Sweet(LOL) essentially refers to a girl who is heavily influenced by mass media, such as magazines, TV, ads, etc. that are targeted towards women. (LOL) is often added, especially on sites like 2ch, to further remove ambiguity (on the 'sweet' part) and add emphasis to the 'sarcastic' nuance in the word.