Love Lists to the Universe 6 Chapter 6 : Tired NOW

It was the day of Red's burial. I was wearing white dress u0026 decides to be 5 meters away.

"It is too hurtful (I put my right hand on my chest while crumpling it). This isn't true."

In a distant Louie is waiting for me in his car. He was wearing shades I doesn't want to go outside.

" Reeeeeddddd!"Red's mother mourned loudly while his coffin was put in the deep hole with white flowers being spread above.

After an hour, all people left except me. I just sit on the grass while looking in the soil where Red was placed. I looked liked an insane woman.

I looked down u0026 doesn't want to moved.

I was too angry to myself. So I removed my two high heeled silver shoes u0026 thrown it away while crying u0026 punching the grass due to my regrets of not telling Red that I love him too.

"Red, please tell me that I was just dreaming." I said while crying u0026 placing my face on the green grass.

While crying, I forgot that someone was waiting for me from faraway.

Louie suddenly lift me up u0026 wiped my dirty face by his two soft hands.

"Stop it. Do not cry for him." He said to me in a serious face.

I stopped crying I just stare to his face. 

He looks upset to me but I do not care.

He tries to fix me by sitting me properly u0026 removing dusts in my white dress.

He walks from a distance u0026 gets my two shoes.

Without saying anything, he touches my too dirty feet to remove grasses.

"Stand." He instructed me.

I stand because he looks angry on me.

He kneel infront of me in a sweet way.

Please put your hand on my top shoulder to avoid finding it hard to wear the shoes.

I t was too kind of Louie. He puts my shoes on me that stopped me from feeling sad.

Though I was too sad, he manages to change my mood.

I stand up straight u0026 he stand infront of me.

He smiled sweetly to me, as if nothing happens.

"Can I fix your lovely hair even if my hand was too dirt?" He asked me.

"Yes..." I said with a smile.

Louie combed my hair by his hand with a smile.

"You are now beautiful again." He said to me while holding my head.

I know he was lying but somehow, even if I looked like this he still take good care of me.

For no reason.

I wish that one day I could return all of his kindness to me.

...but...but now... I should try to fix myself.

--------------------------

On the next day, I was again reading Red's diary beside the beach's riff.

I was feeling too tired of crying u0026 the world without him.

So In my pain, I thrown his diary to the ocean. Then after that, I regret throwing it. So I jumped to get it. However, it was too deep (more than 10 feet) u0026 I am not good in swimming. I am too insane. Louie was at his work. Nobody can save me.

I saw the diary u0026 I was trying to get it but it feels like I was out of oxygen.

Does it mean that I was going to die now? Am I going to see Red in heaven?

Chapter end