Alma
/ Alma 145 Fear of the World
It had surprised the city folk of Haufin and at the same time, made them concerned for where there were Chosen trouble was abound. And it was always the type that they could not deal with themselves. Any matter that required the attention of Chosen was usually considered outside the abilities of mortals.
An unknown event had occurred in the sea a couple of days ago, resulting in an unpredictable change in the weather on the coast. Storms had become much more frequent as of that day. In truth though, that was the least of the city's concerns since they lived in a protected environment.
A terrifying underwater tremor had struck the entire eastern side of the continent three days ago. The energy contained by the sudden incident had been reported to have cost the South, the North, and the East over seven billion credits in damages when the tsunami created by the tremor struck the eastern coast of Mulia along.
Cities across the eastern coast of the continent suffered but had survived the unexpected natural disaster, for the most part. Only a few fatal casualties from the incident had been reported -- a miracle of sorts, given just how unprepared the eastern coast had been for the "freakish" natural disaster...
Reed tapped his heels on the floor as he continued to survey the total damages incurred by the eastern coast on his tome. The figures were not as bad as he had expected at the end of the day, but that was just an excuse he had given himself.
He was none too pleased with himself, despite the fact they had succeeded. People still died, even after they had sealed the fissure. And while it was true that only a small handful of people had died and arguably over 99.99% of the potential damage had been averted because of their efforts, Reed had not been satisfied with the result.
Reed was actually quite frustrated with himself. It wasn't as if he knew the people who had died. None of them ringed a bell to him; they were all strangers to him. But that didn't matter the slightest bit to Reed. He felt intimately connected to the precious few that had died because he, at one point, had been in a very similar position.
Not a day went by when he did not think about the fact that he was supposed to have died. Were it not for his accursed destiny, he would have bled out on that dirty street, bemoaning his original fate as a mortal.
But unlike them, he had been given a way out of his doomed fate. A second chance. Reed was fully aware of how incredible the privilege he had been granted was these days.
I have to be better than this. Even a single life lost is one too many...
Although he was no longer a mortal, Reed still identified as one. Unlike the majority of Chosen who considered themselves walking demigods, he did not feel this way. If anything, Reed felt more human, more mortal than ever before.
Most Chosen would not have felt the same way had they been asked if they still felt mortal. Some of the more immature contenders would have laughed or scoffed in contempt had they been asked the question. A vast majority of conquerors, on the other hand, would have remained silent and not answered had they been asked.
It was a part of the 'mindset' that nearly every Chosen ended up developing the longer they lived. At first, they would childishly think of themselves as special and therefore, above mortals.
This was not uncommon. Contenders strutting themselves around in the mortal world was nothing new.
Eager for attention and fame, many contenders often sought the life they 'deserved 'from the mortal world. In essence, they would often become celebrities in the mortal world, but eventually... it would all begin to wear on them.
They, who considered themselves godlings, would eventually start to feel the strain. A mortal lifetime would pass by and everyone they had previously known would die. The vicious cycle would slowly begin to wear upon them.
Unbeknownst to them, they would begin to suffer a hell of their own making.
They were demigods of the flesh, but not of the spirit.
This was the crucial difference in understanding between a mature Chosen and an immature one. Although it was not related to their ability to command and manipulate Anima, it was considered a very important piece of wisdom among the more experienced Chosen and an unspoken badge of seniority.
For every lifetime, every cycle that passed, another bout of suffering would come. The lucky ones would catch on to what was happening within the first cycle but for most, it would take several centuries of repetitious suffering.
Pain is one of the greatest teachers in life. This could not have been truer for Chosen, who possessed lifespans far beyond their mortal counterparts.
Eventually, they would realize the truth and hide away from the mortal world. They would recede from the fame and fortune they so desperately wanted in the beginning. It was not worth the pain of living amongst mortals.
Watching the people they once called friends grow old, weak, and frail was too much to bear. The endless deaths and funerals one would have to attend were not worth whatever wealth or fame the mortal world could ever offer.
The worst pain of them all was reserved for the very few Chosen who had fallen in love with a mortal. It was an act considered incredibly taboo amongst Chosen for very obvious reasons.
If watching one's own beloved turned to dust was not enough, the death of their children and grandchildren would often cause Chosen to take their lives in the end.
Chosen, for all of the wonderful blessings they had been given, were still very much mortal.
Demigod on the outside; mortal on the inside.
There was a hidden conflict present in almost every conqueror on Mulia because of this simple fact. It was a truth that always threatened to tear apart Chosen -- the nature of their existence.
Although it was not spoken aloud, every mature Chosen -- contender and conqueror -- understood what they had really been gifted when they made a contract with the Will of the World.
Not a blessing, but a curse. A terrible burden that had been made to sound sweeter than honey in their youth.
This was something Reed had learned on his own, much faster than all of his peers because of his unique circumstances. But even so, he did not feel the same way as most of the older Chosen did about mortals and their world.
Unlike them, Reed thought of the mortal world as indispensable. If Chosen, who were cursed to life beyond their normal, predestined lifespans, hid away from the mortal world and detached themselves from it, what purpose would they have to fight?
For wealth? For fame? For power? These reasons belonged to immature Chosen who had not yet learned the truth. They were meaningless in the face of the destruction of the world.
Then, if not for those mundane reasons, why should they continue struggling?
For one's self-preservation? That would not cut it since all Chosen were destined to die in service of the world at some point. This was something every Chosen knew from the outset.
Cowards interested in living forever would not live long anyway, not with the burden they had been entrusted with.
No... it was the people. They were the key. As strange as it sounded, Reed was sure he was right. He felt it in his gut.
Running away from the mortal world for fear of loss is not something a 'wise' person would do.
Reed gazed at the faces of the deceased victims and said, "...I think I understand, now. Why I feel this way, even though I do not know them."
Lu'um who had been focused on plotting their next destination said, "Who are you talking about?" She peered over Reed's shoulder and looked at images, the pictures of the deceased, on his tome.
"Them. I thought that I had been only fighting for my sake, but I might have been wrong. I was so sure that I was right, but now I don't think I can honestly say that I'm doing this for my own sake anymore."
Reed pitied them. The Chosen who had chosen to run away from the mortal world. There was nothing to be gained in hiding in some hidden estate, for fear of losing something... that they had no control over.
"I suppose I have more work to do, now. Though I'm not sure how I'm going to accomplish it, if ever..."
There was too much involved in such a tremendous thing
Chapter end
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