When I Loved You Chapter 45

Yiyoung had struggled her entire life not to be seen as some easy person people could walk all over. She didn't give up even after being treated like a lunatic with nothing but a smart brain in junior high and high school. However, had it not been for Sangsu, she would have probably lost her way in life.

Thinking of the past only brought tears to her eyes. Her school years were dreadful, and were it not for Muyeol's help, she wouldn't be a successful doctor now. Others didn't think of him as a good person, but Yiyoung knew otherwise.

And yet, she could not agree to his proposal right away. He was talking about marriage, after all. Her goodwill toward him slowly disappeared. She had thought Muyeol was different from all those people. Perhaps that was why tears were pooling in her eyes. 

“I'm not crying. I just have dry eyes,” she explained herself. 

Muyeol did not say anything, only stared at her.

“I'm asking you, did you choose me for your plan because I'm easy?” A drop of tear finally slid down her face, but Yiyoung instantly wiped it away. Her expression remained stoic; she was pretending to be alright, but she did not know whether she could control herself if Muyeol agreed with her.

“Do you have an inferiority complex?” he asked.

“What?”

“Then why are you asking such things?”

Flustered, Yiyoung tried to come up with a good answer, but Muyeol continued, “I asked you because you made a promise to me, and I never had any doubt that you wouldn't fulfill it.”

 Yiyoung couldn't figure out whether she should be comforted by his answer. His words would probably keep her up all night; she would spend the entire time thinking of him. Her eyes landed on the glass of red wine. It would help her sleep…

She could not handle her liquor, so whenever she found herself unable to sleep even though she would be physically exhausted, she used alcohol as a substitute for sleeping pills.

Yiyoung reached over and downed half the glass in one go. Muyeol gaped at her. She had mentioned she was a bad drunk earlier… but he could not figure out whether he should stop her. In the end, he settled with not doing anything. He simply watched her right hand tremble as she held the glass.

Soon, the trembling spread to her entire body. However, her eyes were focused on nothing but empty air, lost in deep thought.

After a few beats of silence, Yiyoung addressed him, eyes still staring off into space. “Why are you sure I'll fulfill the promise?”

“Because you're Yoon Yiyoung,” Muyeol replied instantly.

If he had hesitated or tried to make excuses, she would have refused him. But he had not, and Yiyoung had already promised to help him… “Fine. I'll fulfill my promise. What else can I say to you after you tell you desperately need to get married to survive. It was my mistake for saying I would do anything and not specify any conditions. Do we need to have a baby, too?”

“No. I'm not interested in having a child.”

“Sure, sir,” Yiyoung said caustically.

“It won't be any different from your normal life. You just need to move into my house. Then, you can live your life, and I will live mine. That's it.”

Yiyoung blinked repeatedly. The alcohol was finally taking its effect on her. “By any chance, are you seeing anyone right now?”

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“No.”

“What if you fall in love with someone while we're married. What will you do then?”

“That won't happen.”

“Don't be so sure about it. Just tell me.”

“It won't happen,” he repeated.

“Are you impotent?” Yiyoung asked him bluntly.

His eyes flashed with anger, but it disappeared in a split second. “Believe what you want.”

“That's unfortunate.” 

“You are the unfortunate one. If you hadn't dropped out of school like that, you could have been another 'Hillary Clinton'. You had already been accepted by Brown University at the time, hadn't you?”

Yiyoung erupted into uncontrollable laughter. “Oh, sorry. I-I'm not being sarcastic. It's just—” she guffawed again.

She couldn't believe he called her another 'Hillary Clinton'. It was a huge compliment, yet her eyes turned red from the tears. She raised the glass of wine to her mouth, finishing its contents in one gulp.

Muyeol called for the waiter and asked for some more wine before turning to her. “How much alcohol can you usually handle?”

“I don't know. I've never kept count, I just find myself falling asleep after drinking a bit.”

“You fall asleep at whichever place you drink?”

 “Not really. I always go home after drinking, but the moment I get home, I fall asleep anywhere, be it the entrance, the bathroom, or the bedroom.”

“Well, that's good.”

“Nobody should fall asleep outside. It only bothers the people around them.” After Yiyoung's father passed away, she made sure she always got home safe every time she got drunk.

Muyeol changed the subject. “I'll set a date for us to meet my grandmother.”

Yiyoung sighed. She hadn't expected to get married soon, and it felt like she had lost her only chance to date someone.

So she resigned herself to her fate. “I really should give up my future for this promise and return the favor, huh? You helped me so much back in the day. And you even told me about your family… If I denied, then you would have opened up to me for no reason.”

 Muyeol smiled briefly at her words, also noting how her speech had slowed down. 

Chapter end