Stigma Chapter 5 part2

WARNING: DISTURBING CONTENT AHEAD

When he had almost reached the brothel, SeoYoon felt that something was off.

A crowd had gathered in front of the brothel

He didn't know what had happened, but he had an ominous feeling.

“SeoYoon-nim, are you happy?”

He recalled her voice and her expression as she called out to him just as he was about to exit through the door this morning. The ominous feeling worsened.

“Excuse me, please let me through.”

SeoYoon walked through the crowd and entered the brothel.

All the prostitutes were out in the hallway.

Their faces were filled with fear. The normally easygoing madame's face was full of horror.

“Move!”

SeoYoon's dread worsened.

“I said move!”

He pushed through the frightened prostitutes and frantically ran through the hallway.

He ran up the stairs. Just before he reached EunSeo's room, he smelled the stench of blood.

“No way… It can't be…”

It couldn't be.

The scene he was imagining inside his head couldn't be true.

“No…”

His trembling hand opened the door.

The door creaked open, and the stench of blood became stronger.

The whole room was drenched in red.

The walls, the blankets, and the ceiling. It was all covered in blood.

It was as if the blood had burst and drenched the whole room.

And in the midst of all that blood, she was sitting there.

Her face and her hands were covered in blood. However, she didn't look to be in pain.

“EunSeo?”

SeoYoon entered the room and began to approach her. He suddenly stopped.

There was a corpse next to her.

The blood in the room didn't belonged to her. It belonged to this corpse.

The corpse was a man, and SeoYoon recognized its face.

“General… Oh…”

General Oh. The old man.

“Why General Oh…”

Why was General Oh dead in this room?

Someone had decapitated General Oh.

No, why was General Oh dead?

“EunSeo, just what happened…”

“I merely paid my enemy what he was owed.”

EunSeo spoke with a firm voice as she sat in the blood.

“Enemy…?”

“I wondered who caused my brother to die, and it turned out to be this man.”

“What do you…?”

SeoYoon didn't understand.

General Oh caused EunLib to die?

No. EunLib died by SeoYoon's hands.

It wasn't General Oh.

“That day, my brother told us that he'd be leaving the palace early. However, that didn't happen. I asked around, and I found out that before the scary events had taken place, one man had asked my brother to take his place for night duty. The man claimed that his wife was in labor, and so he asked my brother to take his place that night. My foolish brother agreed to it because his own wife was pregnant. My brother, who shouldn't have been there that night, died there.”

“What does this have to do with General Oh?”

“This man, General Oh, was the one who lured my brother there and made sure he was present during the uprising.”

SeoYoon paled at EunSeo's words.

So it hadn't been a coincidence that EunLib had been there that night?

He had been purposefully lured there so that he would be present that night. By none other than General Oh.

“I found my brother's colleague and asked him. I gave him all the money I received from my commission. I asked him why he did it. And he told me everything. The power of gold is quite strong. Several years ago when the first uprising had taken place, my brother was away from the palace to pay his respects to his father-in-law. Therefore he was unable to protect the king from being killed. My brother lived with that guilt ever since then. However, when General Oh saw his king die, he blamed my brother. If my brother had been there, if he had protected him, the king wouldn't have died. That's what he thought. Therefore, he made sure to put my brother in a place where he'd die. And for that, he became my enemy. So I called General Oh to this place and cut off his head with a sword.”

EunSeo's lips stretched into a cold smile.

“I told him that I knew everything about my brother's death. I threatened him by saying that I'd send the king an anonymous letter revealing everything if he didn't come here. And then I pierced his neck. Now that he'd gotten old, he didn't know how to properly use the sword at his waist. So I pierced his neck with a hair ornament… And I unsheathed his sword. I cut off his head using the techniques I learned from my brother.”

EunSeo's smile made SeoYoon's heart twinge.

She smiled as if everything had been resolved.

“And in one fell swoop, I also had my revenge on you.”

EunSeo raised her head and looked up at SeoYoon.

“Having killed a man who was pivotal to the reclamation of the throne, I will be sentenced to death. Don't you think the king will personally order my own beheading? Even you won't be able to save me. Since I have killed such an important man, I will now die.”

Her revenge.

SeoYoon now realized why she smiled.

She had already planned her revenge from the very beginning.

She had elaborately planned out how to give him the most unbearable and hopeless pain.

She took advantage of his love for her revenge.

She would make him watch her die with his own eyes. She would make it unbearable for him to live.

“Once I die, you can just burn my body and let the ashes blow away with the wind.”

SeoYoon dropped to his knees in front of her and lowered his head.

EunSeo's bloody hands touched his face.

As the blood smudged his face, SeoYoon's shoulders began to shake.

EunSeo laughed as she gazed at him.

This was what she had wanted.

This man's despair. This man's suffering. The pain on his face.

She had wanted to see this.

Having seen the sorrowful despair on his face, her revenge was complete.

On General Oh, and on this man.

“EunSeo.”

With blood on his face, and with his body still trembling, SeoYoon whispered quietly.

“Listen well.”

When she heard his low whisper, EunSeo's whole body shivered.

“Let's run away.”

SeoYoon gripped EunSeo's hand and put her on her feet.

“Run away with me.”

“I don't want to.”

“I said let's run away!”

SeoYoon roared.

His face twisted miserably.

“Let's run away and…”

He didn't finish his sentence.

Instead of speaking, he took her by the hand and dragged her out.

He grabbed her bloody hand and ran outside.

The clear sky had turned dark, and it began to rain.

The crowd in front of the brothel scattered at the sudden downpour.

As the people went under the eaves of the nearby buildings to avoid the rain, they saw a man and a woman run out of the brothel.

The man was tall and had a large build, and the woman was completely drenched in blood.

The man was holding the woman's hand as they ran out into the rain. The man placed the woman on the horse that had been tied outside the brothel.

The horse had belonged to General Oh.

“Leave me alone and let me die!”

EunSeo struggled as she was placed on the horse. SeoYoon got on behind her.

“Do you really think I'll leave you to die?!”

He didn't care if he died. However, he wouldn't be able to watch her die.

The horse raced through the pouring rain.

Not long after they had made their escape, word got around that General Oh had been murdered. A group of soldiers had raced over to the scene on their horses.

Then they heard that the murderers had escaped, so they began to chase after them.

The horse's hooves splashed in the mud.

The rainy season had passed, but the torrential rain poured down. The horse's mane, the man grabbing onto the reins, and the woman sitting in front of him were all completely drenched.

They didn't know where they were going.

They just blindly ran away.

“Haw!”

As they turned into the mountain path, the horse began to race along the bank of the creek. The wet branches brushed against them as SeoYoon urged the horse to go faster.

He turned around and saw the men that were coming after them.

They had already found them.

‘If we're caught here…!'

“Haw!”

He pressed his feet into the horse's flanks as he directed the horse to go faster.

Suddenly, an arrow split through the rain and successfully landed on the horse.

“Kyaaa!”

“Hold on tight!”

As the horse tumbled to the ground, SeoYoon grabbed EunSeo and held her tightly to his chest as they rolled onto the ground.

Splat!

SeoYoon didn't let EunSeo leave his embrace as they rolled through the mud.

He held her tightly to him as they rolled and rolled down the hill. They hit a tree, slowing their descent. SeoYoon held back his scream. He hit his shoulder, and it felt as if it had fractured.

“Ugh…”

SeoYoon lifted his head and saw dozens of men get off their horses as they came after them.

And he finally unwound his arms from around EunSeo and pushed her away.

“Go.”

SeoYoon's eyes were wet.

“Please, go. Don't say that you'll die and please go. Go and live. In my place.”

“When did I ever ask you to save me?! Leave me alone so that I may die!”

“If you die, how can I live?!”

SeoYoon roared.

“Just how amazing is this thing called revenge? If you die like this, do you think your brother will praise you for dying so well?! Do you think he will tell you that you did a great job?! All for something like revenge?!”

Tears flowed down from SeoYoon's eyes.

He should have known.

Revenge was nothing.

He should have thrown away this thing called revenge early on and lived his life.

The dead walked one path, and the living walked another.

He should have forgotten the dead and lived an even more joyful life in their stead.

This was his divine punishment for being unable to do so.

For letting revenge steal his heart. For the stupidity of not seeing what was more important.

“Forget revenge… Let go of your revenge with my death. And live. Live for your brother. For your sister-in-law. For your unborn nephew. For my own sister and for my parents as well. You must live. You must live a much happier life than all of us.”

SeoYoon cupped her face with his wet hands.

“I'm begging you… Live. That is my final wish. Please… Please don't die and live…”

As he held her face, EunSeo's eyes began to shake.

General Oh was dead.

And she was planning on dying herself.

She believed that this was her revenge on this man.

As he begged her to live, she believed that this was the greatest revenge she could have on him.

But something was off.

What was this feeling?

“Huu…”

Tears burst out of her eyes.

She had come all the way here, but why was her heart crumbling now?

“Promise me. Promise me that you'll live.”

“Huuuu….”

EunSeo began to weep at SeoYoon's words.

The rain and her tears dripped down her cheeks before hitting SeoYoon's lips.

SeoYoon frantically stole EunSeo's lips as if this was be the last time he would taste them.

He greedily sucked her breath from her lips.

EunSeo didn't reject his kiss.

EunSeo lovingly received his tongue as it entered her mouth.

For the first and last time, she tenderly received him.

“Now go.”

SeoYoon ripped his lips off of hers and pushed her away. He unsheathed the sword at his hip and stood up.

Even though one shoulder was broken, he needed to buy her enough time to escape.

“Together…!”

EunSeo suddenly grabbed SeoYoon's arm.

“Let's go together!”

“But I…!”

“If we're not leaving together, then I won't go. I won't go alone!”

EunSeo hung on to SeoYoon's arm.

“I won't live on my own. If I survive alone, I'd rather die. So if you want me to live, come with me. Come with me and watch me live till the end with your own eyes.”

After hearing EunSeo's pleas, SeoYoon threw his sword down to the ground.

Then he grabbed her hand and they both began to run through the rain.

Even though they could hear the loud footsteps of their pursuers behind them, they didn't turn back. SeoYoon merely held on to EunSeo's hand and ran, their feet plunging into the mud.

After only a few steps, they both slipped on a wet slope. As they slipped and fell, SeoYoon never let go of EunSeo. They rolled down the hill.

The two of them rolled down into the dark abyss.

What woke EunSeo up was the cold rain.

She felt limp and very cold.

She felt her mind sink down into the depths of hell due to the freezing cold. However, someone was shaking her.

“Wake up!”

She heard a faint voice in the darkness. EunSeo opened her eyes.

There was a man looking down at her.

“Mmmm…”

The man laughed when he heard her moan.

When he realized that she was alive, he cried and laughed.

Then he put her on his back and began to walk.

The man's body was also a wreck.

His broken and torn body carried her on his back as he navigated the dangerous mountain path.

Just like the first time they met, he carried her on his back as he went down the slope.

The rain had wet the ground, making the mountain slope extremely slippery. It wasn't an easy feat. His feet had a hard time finding traction, and his body was tense as he tried to hold his ground. Still, he securely held the wounded woman on his back.

Even though things had finally died down, the endlessly pouring rain blinded them in this overgrown forest, causing each step to be placed down very carefully.

The muddy water splashed against the man's face.

They went up and down the mountain several times before they came across an abandoned shack.

Because they had wandered around the mountain for so long, no one was following them anymore.

They went inside the shack and took off their wet clothes and hung them to dry.

There was no fire. There was nothing.

There were no blankets. They had nothing to keep them warm. As they huddled their bodies, the cold swept over them.

It was summer, but their wet bodies were torn up, so they couldn't help but feel cold.

“Are you very cold?”

SeoYoon pulled her back to his chest and embraced her.

As his skin covered her own, EunSeo felt the warmth permeate throughout her body.

“It'll feel better if we stay like this.”

The man hugged her tight. His breaths brushed over her ear.

Like he said, his embrace was warm.

It was so warm that tears filled her eyes.

Having noticed that she was quietly sobbing, SeoYoon began to say ‘I'm sorry' over and over again.

She didn't know what he was sorry about, but he continued to say he was sorry.

Hatred, resentment, loathing… Did all those emotions get washed away with the rain?

Or did she just not have the energy to keep the fire going?

She no longer felt the desire to have her revenge. It had completely left her heart.

Instead of revenge, all that was left in her heart was this man's voice as he urged her to escape.

His pleas to her as he begged her to live. It was carved into her heart.

Could she continue to live together with him?

Would she be forgiven?

Would everyone forgive her for living on with this man? For not hating this man?

Was she doing something unforgiveable?

Aah, if the dead gave her their permission, she wanted to live with this man. This beautiful man. This man who she loved above all else.

She wanted to live on with this man.

Forgetting everything.

Forgetting everything, she wanted to be with this man and live quietly.

“Let's live…”

When she heard his whisper, EunSeo nodded.

“All I have to offer is my heart, but if it's alright with you, let's live on together. For those that have died. Let's do our best and live.”

EunSeo nodded again.

She'd already had her revenge.

If all the hardship and suffering were enough, she now wanted to live on as she waited for spring to come.

“Let's go… to my mother's house…”

There was only place they could still go.

Her maternal home.

They would have to go over the mountain.

The place she was trying to go when she met this man for the first time.

Let's go there.

Let's go and live with this man, together.

In a world where no one would intervene between them.

Forget everything. Live on for those that died.

TN: This novel… how do I describe this novel? Ugh, I just want everyone to be happy! I'm tired of all this revenge. Just live and be happy!
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

Sidenote: I saw a comment on the NU page for Stigma saying that this novel was glorifying rape because ES felt pleasure even when she was being taken against her will.
The commenter said that a woman will not feel pleasure, only disgust, when being sexually assaulted by a man she hates. Unfortunately, that is not true.

Some rape victims feel shame because they were physically aroused even though they emotionally and psychologically hated every moment of it. They feel as if their bodies betrayed them. This is because sometimes the body just reacts to the stimuli, whether you want it to or not. This doesn't happen in every case, but it is common enough according to reports taken from sexual abuse/assault victims (both men and women).

It has been compared to the sensation of being tickled. If someone forcefully tickled us, we'd laugh, but does that mean we like it? No. Would we want it to stop? Yes. And yet we still laugh. Unfortunately, you don't have to feel love for your body to feel pleasure.

Sorry for the long rant. This topic isn't widely discussed, but it should be. I was worried a sexual assault victim might read the comment and feel that their experience meant that something was wrong with them. Nothing is wrong with you. Everything is wrong with the abuser.

Click and for more info.

Short epilogue will wrap up this novel tomorrow! That's all, folks!

Chapter end