If I Disobey the Duke Chapter 78

Confession (1)

TRIGGER WARNING: child abuse, pedophilia

The entirety of the boldface text is a flashback; if it's uncomfortable to read, the TLDR is that Lily's dad is a disgusting, sexist, money-grubbing bastard who insistently sells her off in exchange for business favors.

[Huh? Sister, where are you going today? Today, you wore the wide hat that adults do.]

A red-haired kid stopped at the entrance to the room.  Even though he was wearing a cute outfit, it was muddy.

The wooden sword the little boy was carrying was made of solid redwood, and the tunic and trousers were high-quality items that even ordinary people could hardly touch.

Lily, who was looking at the cradle with her back facing the window, lifted her head.

As the wide brim of her hat was pushed down, she quickly pushed the hat up with her little hands covered in silk gloves.

[Rocus. This is uncomfortable. I can't even move my neck.]

(tls/n: Rocus is the nickname of Crocus.)

A hat adorned with red roses and long feathers.

The design was too mature for a 10-year-old child to wear.

The same was true of her red dress, with her hair tied up to reveal her neckline, shoulders and collarbones.

[Sister. These clothes are weird. Neither Mother nor the nanny wears anything like that.]

[Shh. Come here. Dandelion is sleeping with Antonio.]

Crocus slowly walked over to his older sister and draped his wooden sword over his shoulder, peering into the cradle opposite his older sister.

[Looking at it this way, Dandelion looks very big. He is now three years old.]

[Antonio still only drinks milk, but Dandelion can eat everything. He will grow taller.]

Lily closed her big eyes and smiled bashfully.

[Hm…] Dandelion groaned at the sound of her older sister and older brother's whispers.

Lily grabbed Crocus hurriedly. [He will wake up. Let's stop now.]

Only after holding their breath and sneaking out did the two children breathe out at the same time.

Lily muttered, [I hope Dandelion grows up quickly. It's because he looks just like me, he's so cute. I hope we can play together when we grow up.]

[Dandelion is going to learn swordsmanship with me. Older sister is a woman and Dandelion is a man.]

Lily looked at Crocus with her big green eyes. [Then who am I playing with? You are a man too, Dandelion is a man, and Antonio is a man too!]

[Tell Mother to give birth again. This time around two girls. Then I have two younger brothers, and my older sister has two younger sisters. It's fair.]

[Mom is sick in the hospital, what are you talking about? Having a baby is very difficult.]

Their mother was congenitally weak. However, since she gave birth to four children, it seemed that she was not that weak to that extent.

Crocus lowered his head. He didn't like his sister's words. [Mom is not sick. She'll get better soon.]

Lily felt sorry for her younger brother, but stopped herself from patting his head.

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It was because she remembered her father's orders to never soil her silk gloves.

Lily lowered her hand [You're right. Mom will get well soon. Once I come back when Father brings me here again, she will get better sooner.]

Crocus's eyes narrowed. Lily's green eyes, twinkling with anticipation, looked like a pretty sky.

[Really? Where is Sister going? Are you going to Mother?]

She shook her head.  Her hat went down and she grunted and put it back up again.

[No. I don't know where. He said I should just follow along to find out.]

[Are you still shivering? Lily.]

Lily jumped like a startled cat at her father's voice.

When her brother and her turned around, they saw a man wearing a fedora with silver hair tucked tight.

Their father, Shylock Isles, had the impression that he had gathered all the cynical emotions of the whole world.

His face was pale overall, and his eyes and bloodless lips gave off a cold, calculating feeling.

[You're an older sister, but you can't even be a proper example. How long are you going to be like this? Don't forget you're like a mother to your siblings now.]

[Sorry, Father…]

Unlike Lily, who withdrew, Crocus ran happily towards his father. [Father! I played Dylan for the first time today! I won and Sir Eldberg praised me!  When I get older… Ugh!]

Shylock pointed at his son with his gilded wand. [It is commendable that your investment is worth it, but it is not acceptable to get your father's clothes dirty today, Crocus.]

He tilted his head. [What day is it today, Father?]

Shylock's cold eyes rolled towards Lily.

Lily lowered her head almost like a timid dog, avoiding her father's eyes.

Shylock stared coldly at Lily and murmured, [It's an important day when your sister fulfills her role.]

Lily's stomach churned with tension.

Today was a really good day.

The place Lily arrived in over three days was a city made of dust and filth.

Roads and water facilities were poorly maintained, causing a stench. Wagons were rattling throughout the city.

The coachman whipped the beggars away.

After a while, the carriage entered the old castle with its outer walls torn down.

Lily stood down in the carriage, terrified. [Where is this? Father?]

Shylock only glared at Lily.

Lily shivered as if she had been hit on the cheek.

Shylock muttered, [Didn't I tell you not to open your mouth until I've given permission to? This little girl—]

Lily pressed her lips together and nodded her head slightly.

Chapter end