Cupid Goes Home

When we last saw Cupid he had just given Psyche a little self-righteous lecture and was on his way to Olympus. But he kept looking back at Psyche, lying in the grasses where she had fallen. It was all he could do not to turn around, go to her, and apologize for being such a fathead. He was surprised that he still wanted to be with her. He had thought his leaving would punish her for not obeying him. Only now did he realize: by leaving he was also punishing himself.

As much as he wanted to return to her, he couldn't. Well, he could have, but he was acting like a stubborn boy, unable to admit that he had made a mistake. He thought it would show weakness if he went back to her. Even worse, he was afraid that if she found out that seeing her in pain could make him change his mind, she would be in control of the relationship. He could not allow that.

Why had she ruined things? It had been a perfect relationship. He had given her more riches than any mortal had ever seen; he had given her servants to wait on her. Every night he had made love to her. Why hadn't all that been enough?

Now he had to face Venus. How could he explain going against her wishes? He couldn't. There was no justification for disobeying his mother.

When Cupid reached Olympus, he landed in a large field near the palace he shared with Venus. He looked for signs of activity but saw nothing. Perhaps she was away. He hoped so. All he wanted to do was go to his chambers, get in bed, and go to sleep. He was not feeling well.

But he was a god, and gods did not get ill, though what else could he call the pain he felt in his abdomen, the aching in his head, not to mention the general malaise that had come over him? His spirit felt heavy, as if he were lying beneath the ground, unable to move and, strangely, without any desire to. What he really wanted to do was curl up in bed and cry

He made his way slowly to the palace. He peered in windows until he found his mother, in her chambers, receiving a massage from Oizys. The goddess of pain smiled as she watched Cupid hurry to the other side of the palace, where his chambers were.

When he reached his rooms, he took off his bow and quiver of arrows. Then he lay on his bed, and despite his resolve not to, he began to cry.

Chapter end