Crashing Into You 290 DO YOU LOVE HIM?

"Song Dei Si felt a pang on her heart. She suddenly remember the pain she had gone through because of that. She had almost believed that it was her fault why Tan Ja Nin was hurting so bad then that she resorted to taking a lot of sleeping pills just to calm her nerves. She suddenly remember the pain of being left alone with someone who blamed her for what had happened to Tan Ja Nin. 

Tan Ja Nin looked at Song Dei Si and noticed her pained expression. "I'm sorry if I didn't make it clear before. I was confused and wasn't ready yet to be asked about Lee Jin Ho so I made my feelings for Yan Mor Tee as my scapegoat. Can you forgive me for being a coward to tell the truth?"

Song Dei Si wasn't able to react right away, she just gave Tan Ja Nin a blank stare. She stroked her glabella as she spoke. "Let's bygones, be bygones. If I were to put myself in your shoes, I might feel the same, we may have different approach on how we deal with our feelings but I believe that what you did was solely based on what you think was best at that moment" 

"Why are you so kind and understanding? I wasn't able to hate you before even if Yan Mor Tee fell for you because I know deep inside that you're so easy to love" Tan Ja Nin said. "Don't you know that sometimes, I just wish I could be someone just like you. You're almost perfect." 

"I also have flaws." Song Dei Si said.

"Have you ever got mad on your entire life and hold grudges?" Tan Ja Nin asked. 

"I got mad too but I don't hold grudges as it will also gives you more pain."

Tan Ja Nin nodded. She realized, she loves hanging out with Song Dei Si because her positive outlook was so infectious. She always look at things in every perspective. Lee Jin Ho was right. This woman wasn't a judgmental person and would wait for your explanation first before she could derived with her own conclusion. 

"So what are your plans now? Are you going to tell to the whole group that you and Lee Jin Ho are dating now.." 

"I am afraid how would my brother would take it...just like what I've said our relationship wasn't the normal relationship that started into courtship. We are in this relationship right now because we both feel that we should be in this relationship because something should be held responsible."

Song Dei Si thought about it too. "Do you love him?"

Tan Ja Nin bowed her head and nodded. 

Song Dei Si smiled. "Then you have the right reason to stay in this relationship..."

"But he doesn't feel the same way for me.." Tan Ja Nin said

"How did you know?" Song Dei Si asked.

Tan Ja Nin shrugged her shoulders. "Sometimes, I do feel that he wasn't over you yet" Tan Ja Nin honestly answeredz

Song Dei Si was stunned. "How can you say that?"

"It won't be that easy to forget someone you love for so long right?!" 

"You have loved Yan Mor Tee for so long too... but haven't you just said that you love Lee Jin Ho now? If you were able to forget Yan Mor Tee, Lee Jin Ho might have already forgotten me too." 

Tan Ja Nin pondered what Song Dei Si has said...and it made a lot of sense. "I envy Ho Min Lin's relationship with my brother. It is so smooth sailing..."

Song Dei Si smiled. Sometimes, she felt a little envious too. Ho Min Lin's relationship with Tan Ji Nan was almost perfect. They have admitted their feelings with one another first before they have decided to take their relationship into the next level. "Speaking of Ho Min Lin, what's going to be our plans for her despedida de soltera party. Whom shall we invite?" 

"I guess aside from us, we can also invite her other friends in her workplace and her close friends during her Uni days. We can also invite some of her closest girls cousin too." Tan Ja Nin said.

"But how can we get in touch with these people? Should we stalk Ho Min Lin's Weibo account to know her close friends aside from the two of us?" She said. 

"We can do that or I can possibly ask her cousin Bo Yu to help us gather all her closest female cousin to the party."

"Okay! I'll do the stalking at her Weibo account and will be in-charged to locate her other friends from Uni and her closest friends at work." 

"Uhm!" Tan Ja Nin smiled and has started to send a text message to Bo Yu. Good thing she saved his number before when he was still pursuing her.

.....

Tan Ja Nin went directly to Lee Jin Ho's pad after her dinner with Song Dei Si. Lee Jin Ho was surprised when she suddenly appeared without notice. 

"You didn't tell me you'll be here tonight!" Lee Jin Ho said. He was at the living room watching an evening news.

"It was intentional. Good thing I didn't see any girls here with my surprise visit!" Tan Ja Nin said and sat beside Lee Jin Ho at the sofa. 

Lee Jin Ho hissed. "If your looking for a reason to break up with me then sorry you wouldn't find me having an affair with another girl."

Tan Ja Nin curled up her lips. 

"Did you eat already?" Lee Jin Ho asked.

"Uhm. I had a dinner with Song Dei Si before I came here" Tan Ja Nin answered. 

"So how's your dinner with Song Dei Si?" Lee Jin Ho asked. 

"We have a good time. We still have a lot of stories to share with each other but got a little time. She needs to come home before 9PM because she needs to wake up as early as 5AM to prepare Yan Mor Tee's breakfast..." 

A memory flashes through Lee Jin Ho's mind. It was the day when he picked up Song Dei Si from her apartment and found out that she report to the office before 6:30AM just to prepare for Yan Mor Tee's coffee. It was the same day that he made a subtle proposal to her and wad rejected. 

Tan Ja Nin noticed that Lee Jin Ho was spacing out. 

"What are you thinking?" She asked.

"I just thought of something related to what you've said. I have found out before that Song Dei Si went to Yan Enterprise office as early as 6:30AM just to prepare Yan Mor Tee's coffee.."

"When was that?" Tan Ja Nin curiously asked.

"When I was still pursuing her..."

"I see" Tan Ja Nin said. Jealousy has immediately taken over her. "Do you wish your girlfriend is someone like Song Dei Si who will be waking up so early just to prepare your breakfast?"

Lee Jin Ho have detected the jealousy on Tan Ja Nin's voice. "I would love to but what can I do, my girlfriend is a celebrity and I'm not her priority..." he teased her. 

Tan Ja Nin lips pouted. "I have also woke up as early as 4PM before just to prepare your breakfast" 

"It was because you have no choice. You have to do that because it will benifits you!" Lee Jin Ho scoffed. 

"So should I move in to your pad now...so I can prepare your breakfast everyday when I don't have an early call time at work?" 

Lee Jin Ho eyes widened in disbelief. "Are you really asking me?"

Tan Ja Nin smiled and nodded. 

Lee Jin Ho suddenly pulled her closer and kissed her on the lips. "Then start moving in here tonight!" 

"Uhm, then help me pick up my things in my apartment tomorrow!" 

"Sure!"

Tan Ja Nin embraced Lee Jin Ho. "Let's announce our relationship to our friends after my brother's wedding..."

Lee Jin Ho's eyes has widened in disbelief again.

"Are you sure?" 

"Uhm! Because what's the use of hiding it? Just prepare yourself to be beaten by my brother!" She said as she warned him.

Lee Jin Ho laughed "I have long prepared myself for that!" 

"But we cannot divulge our relationship to the public yet..." Tan Ja Nin said.

Lee Jin Ho nodded "Understood. It doesn't really matter to me if you wanted to keep me out from the public eyes. What's matter is that our close friends and family are aware of our relationship."

Tan Ja Nin smiled "Why are you so sensible?" 

Lee Jin Ho pinched her nose "Do you find me so lovable because of that?" 

Tan Ja Nin hissed. "Such a conceited person!" 

Lee Jin Ho laughed and carried her to the bedroom.

"You will love me more with what I'm going to do to you now.." Lee Jin Ho said teasingly. 

Tan Ja Nin laughed so heartily. "Give me your best service then!" 

"As you wish my Young Madam" 

Chapter end