Auntie Toasts The VRMMORPG
/ Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG 95 2.1 Temple Cleaning
Yesterday, Flora had received a quest from Evailyn. She dreaded doing social things like investigating but was willing to beat up some bishops.
Quest: Set My House In Order (Evailyn)
Description: Power Plays are disrupting the operation of Evailyn's church. Corruption and selfishness are running rampant. Identify the unfaithful council members and evict them from the church.
Temporary Power: Excommunicate. Description: Severes the formal ties to a church.
Possible Rewards: Reputation gain with Church of Evailyn, Faith
Possible Penalties: Reputation loss with Church of Evailyn, Loss of Faith
Time-Limit: 1 week
Difficulty: B
The church resided in the Holy District of the Capital. Flora needed a while to jog from the Talpica Portal to the church. Near the portal, the sidewalks were stuffed with people, and Flora couldn't reach the speed she wanted to. She wore the octopussy like a backpack because she didn't want to lose it or other people to trip over it.
The city had broad streets filled with the same anachronistic assortment of vehicles as the Metaworld. Over the roofs flying crafts floated through the air, but there was an open corridor between the streets and them.
"It's because of traffic regulations. You can only rise and sink in the designated zones. Usually, they are in the middle of the streets between sidestreets." Aidan explained the strange phenomenon to her.
"We need a ride…" Flora didn't say more because her mind filled up with ideas. Motorcycles, hoover bikes, flying treasure chests, and toaster spaceships flitted through it. Aidan had to add sound effects to the arrows he guided Flora with because she kept missing turns.
When Flora reached the temple, her thoughts were still preoccupied (a flying Jacuzzi!), and she almost ran into some guys blocking the door.
"Oh, sorry, dears."
"You are not welcome in the temple of the Goddess Evailyn. Please leave, Ma'am." The guy in the shiniest armor said.
Flora gazed at their badges. They were three C rated temple guards, and one D rated priest. Their levels reached from level 50 to 150, but the zone squeezed them to level 1. All of Talpica was a level one zone.
"Why?"
"Orders, Ma'am."
"Concerning me, or is no one allowed to enter?" Flora pitied them. They were just pawns in a game played by the bishops.
"The council commanded us to block you specifically, Ma'am."
"Pardon, dears, I have to enter. I'm the Champion, for now at least." Flora activated Kinetic Shield.
The guards first blocked her with arms, but Flora just ignored them. Then a male Fireling hugged her from behind, a female Woodling grabbed her arm, and the Waterling speaker positioned himself in front of her.
Flora carefully took one step after another. She pulled the Fireling and Woodling with her and pushed the waterling. Meanwhile, the fourth guard, a waterling priest, gaped at her.
The boots of the guards screeched as they got dragged on the floor.
Flora was strong, but moving three buff guards in armor would soon overburden her. After she inserted two more nocks in her mech-suit, she still struggled but progressed slowly into the corridor to the main hall.
"Stop in the name of the Goddess Evailyn!" The portly bishop Hannes Dysian whom she met yesterday and had nothing good to say about, was in the main hall again.
"Don't misuse her name. I proceed in the name of the Goddess Evailyn," Flora had fun saying in her most theatrical voice.
Her phone rang. Flora groaned half from exertion half from the lousy timing. The Fireling and Woodling had lost their footing but still clung to her. She was dragging them while the waterling pushed against her.
"Hello, Darling! Why do I see the back of some guy's head? Are you doing interesting things?" The video window with Eddie's face rose above the guard in front of her, and his laughter filled the church. "I might have said before when you'd gone overboard with the toaster theme that you should accessorize LIKE a human being and not WITH human beings. This could become a trend. One guy as belt, one girl as an armbrace. The frontal guy doesn't suit you. Replace him with someone smaller; maybe a Woodling would go better with your eyes."
Flora grunted and took another step. "What's up, Eddie. I'm busy."
The bishop dashed away. The priest followed Flora's pile of humans, scratching his head.
"My timing is fantastic! Your sight is a ray of light in my shabby day. I have news, which will ruin your day, too. I prefer to deliver them in person, if possible, today. When are you free?"
"Tonight, eight o'clock?"
"Great, I'm coming to your hot spring. I'll bring snacks." Eddie disconnected with a wave.
Flora reached the main hall and stopped.
"Dear Goddess Evailyn, please task your followers with quests to further our goals." Flora had discussed with Evailyn for what to use her Champion praying power this week.
Gods had a limited amount of quests they could give out. If Flora prayed for it, Evailyn's weekly limit would be raised from one to ten quests on that day.
The Waterling guard abruptly stepped back, causing Flora to stagger.
"Guards. Stay clear of our Champion! I received a quest from our Goddess to help support the Champion on her holy endeavor." Tali Rondas commanded.
Flora's arm and torso regained their freedom, and she stretched.
"Really, Sarge? She is the Champion?" The priest scratched head. "I don't understand it. Why are the bishops so against her?"
"We will find out today," Flora answered. "Lead me to the rooms where the records are kept."
Flora knew only two things about the investigation, one from TV-show CSI: you can solve anything with DNA prints and the other from the hunt after Al Capone: Follow the Money.
Although she was open to the idea of collecting DNA samples, she deemed the second strategy more fitting for the situation.
"What records?"
"Bills, salaries, financial data."
The guards looked at each other and shrugged.
"I guess every bishop keeps their own record."
"Round up every council member and lead them into the great hall. Only say to them, that I will prove to them I'm the Champion and that I'm on a quest for our Goddess for which I need their help."
Flora impressed upon them to be quiet about her interest in the records and told them to fetch Deriga too.
"The temple has a local area network. It's private, but the security looks quite shoddy." Aidan's voice sounded disapproving, which made Flora smile.
"Hack it." She connected his jack to the lockpick and two Firefly-Toasters, then a third one with Aito. The robots consisted of a toaster, a small bowl of jam, a grabbler, some sensors, and two pairs of insectoid wings. She wanted to monitor the proceedings in the temple and make a good impression at once. Letting her spies distribute delicious toast covered both requisites.
Flora set the hungry chest in the corner of the central hall and connected Aidan to it. She put all the hacking tools in it, out of sight. Then she fetched two gizmos she bought for the occasion.
Name: Globe of Revelation
Type: Artifact
Regular-Mode: 5 OV ManRegeneration
Effect: All active mana skills and cast mana skills in a circumference of 2 m will appear above the Globe.
Rating: A
The device had revealed its usefulness by annoying the Central Tank lawyers a few days ago. Robby had borrowed the original from Flora. She hadn't bothered to ask him to return it and bought a new one. When she searched the marketplace for it, she discovered another Globe with even better powers.
Name: Globe of Honesty
Type: Artifact
Regular-Mode: 5 OV ManRegeneration
Effect: Glows red when a lie is stated
Tier 1 (Upgradeable)
Rating: A
Flora had considered hiding the orbs as well, but she decided on transparency. She had no illusions about her ability to be sneaky. A long list of failed surprise gifts and parties were proof of her inability to hide even the most socially acceptable secrets.
The sound of angry footsteps announced the arrival of the bishops.
A crowd of young novices had formed around the door but parted to let the council members pass. Hannes Dysian had returned with Afstira Nomizo and Ellaciel Zander in tow.
Dysian's face was an unhealthy shade of red, which was exacerbated by his natural blue skin color. Ellaciel Zander had straight silver hair, which framed her austere silver face like a steel curtain. Nomizo trailed behind them. She was older than her colleagues, closer to Flora's age. Flora hadn't mastered judging the ages of the elemental races accurately, but the barklike qualities of Woodlings' skin grew more pronounced.
"You dared to come back!" Dysian said between gasps for air. "Your charade will end today!"
The females nodded, including Flora.
"We are waiting for the other council members to arrive," Flora said. "Meanwhile, we can do a round of introductions. I would love to start, but I'm sure the others would profit from getting to know me as well, so we wait for them for my turn. Please, Bishop Nomizo, tell me about yourself, your favorite home appliance, and your role in the church."
"I'm responsible for-" Nomizo started.
"You shouldn't go along with her demands!" Dysian said.
The Globe of Honesty stayed colorless. In Flora's opinion, Dysian's statement was as unwise as wrong, but maybe it didn't count as a lie because he believed it.
"Oh, shut up." Nomizo sneered at the blustering Waterling. "It's pretty obvious she is the Champion. I'm through with playing up to the farce that she is not. What do we profit by denying it? We just look like fools… let me correct that sentence: we are already looking like fools. Even if she is not the Champion or will lose the title, it's clear to me that our Goddess likes her. So a bit of politeness will go a long way."
"Thank you for your professionalism, Bishop," Flora said, but she wondered if the magical trinkets caused Nomizo's sudden support.
"I'm responsible for the coordination of the church's activities between the worlds. That's the reason I was the one visiting you in the Metaworld. My favorite home appliances are leaf blowers."
"Thank you. What about you, Bishop Zander?"
The Metalling stared silently at Flora. Flora couldn't read her facial expression. It was like looking at a silver statue.
"Your duty is to stare emotionless?" Flora guessed then grinned. "Is this a game of charade? I have to warn you, we are great at it."
"Ha, I knew it!" Hannes yelled. "You are playing a charade!"
"Okay, I should have been more specific. My team is great at solving charades, not executing them." Flora smirked at him. "I don't like playing games. I try to be as straight as possible, but it's hard if I crash into a wall of disbelief."
"I appreciate if we would all cool down and stick to the facts," Nomizo said and pointed at Zander. "Her job is education."
"My job is education. It's not your job to educate the pretend-Champion." Zander's face was still like a lake.
The orb didn't show any change in color. Flora checked her settings if she missed pressing the on-button.
"Then do your job!" The women glared at each other.
"Alright, what about you, Bishop Dysian?"
Dysian took a deep breath, and Flora was sure he would go on another tirade, but a loud voice interrupted him.
"Welcome, Champion Flowers! I'm so sorry I have missed your last visit." The man looked similar to Hannes Dysian in stature, race, and hairstyle. However, he looked like the original, while Dysian was the cheap copy.
Name: Raffas Razo
Class: High-Priest
Title: Pope
Level: 1 (250)
Rating: A
RGS: 25
"Thank you." Flora didn't expect such a warm welcome, without the Globe contradicting it, and her face showed it. But she was attentive enough to notice the other bishops didn't fare any better. Dysian went slack-jawed, Nomizo's wrinkles grew deeper, and Zander's face vibrated as if it was going to burst.
Flowing Flowers to Aidan: "Show me the Globe of Honesty in my HUD. I want to watch it and the Council at the same time. Save video feeds of their facial expressions for further review."
Behind the Pope, a corpulent Waterling arrived. His speed exceeded his colleagues, but despite his girth, he wasn't out of breath.
"Sorry, I'm late to the party! So nice to meet you, Champion. I'm so excited that our small church has one! It will bring good things for us, surely. I can't wait for the next Game of Powers." The cheerful newcomer said, and the Globe of Honesty remained dark.
Name: Mino Irden
Class: Abbot
Level: 1 (250)
Rating: B
RGS: 10
The last member of the Council, Captain Tomos Ceart, entered the hall.
"Good afternoon."
Finally, the orb glowed red.
Chapter end
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