It didn't matter what you got charged with, stealing, assault, trafficking, drug possession even murder, as long as I know your innocent, you own the court.

I don't bribe nor do I perform tricks, what I do is simple manipulation. You see it's rather simple, there are two thing that decide a trial, one is the jury the other is the truth and sadly for my opposition they both can be manipulated.

Today started as any other day I woke up early in my pent house, went to my personal gym, did a little work out and hit the shower. After that my personal chef made me my nutritionally balanced meal, after silently enjoying my breakfast I took my Austin martin to work.

I drove slowly, enjoying the view around me even though there was nothing but skyscrapers and loud cars everywhere, it was still an enjoyable sight to see. After thirty minutes or so I arrived in front of a very tall building which also happens to be were I work.

The building has it's own parking space as well as parking services, but since my car was hilariously expensive I didn't really trust anyone with it, so I personally took it to my personal parking space.

And as soon as I got of the car, the first thing I saw was a group of Malina cartel members coming toward me. Now you may ask what led me to believe that these people were from the Malina cartel, well it was actually my keen senses as a lawyer, my understanding of the criminal mind and my study of a criminal's behaviour pattern that made him deduce their identities.

Plus their faces had the logo of the Malina cartel tattooed on it, which was a penis by the way. It looked like their eyes were the balls and the dick goes all the way to their upper lip and they were even wearing the cartels signature shirt that said I love drugs on it.

And yes before you ask they really are dumb enough to put their criminal factions logo on their faces and yes their cartel logo is a penis apparently their boss really likes them. But if you ask me the people even dumber than these idiots are those cops that can't even catch them, like really what can they really do if they can't even follow small clues or in this case a giant face tattoo.

Right now I was pretty much hoping that they were not from the cartel and that they just happened to like dicks on their faces because I know that the this cartel had previously threatening me to lose my last case. This case that I've been working on for the past two week it was a terrorism case that was actually a scheme for the drug cartel to get a huge shipment of dugs into the U.S.

Since they had the F.B.I watching their every move, they made a plan that would get them of their tail for a couple of days which would be enough time for them to bring in their new shipment. So they found a young Muslim that had a beard not fitting his age which represented the stereotype of a terrorist

After that they put a few bombs in a backpack that resembled his and then they found the right moment to switch the bags, and as soon as they did they alerted the F.B.I which had a protocol that states that if there exists any sort of solid information on a terrorist plot then it would be all hands on deck and they were stupid enough to leave the cartel unattended.

Giving the drug cartel enough of an opening for them to ship they're yearly drugs supply freely and since their little ploy worked all that was left was to reach out to their contacts in prison and get him stabbed in there, it was a brilliant plan really, the only thing that would ruin their plan was if a busy body lawyer did his job well.

So they came and threatened me by saying that if I want the people, I loves to stay safe then I better lose the case, which made me laugh at their faces as I proudly said 'I have no loved ones' which made those gangsters pat my shoulder out of sympathy and they even began to console me by saying that I will find love someday.

I would have really felt touched if they didn't have huge dicks on their faces.

Then they told me their reason, for doing it, the effort they put in it and they even told me how they played those boy scouts from the F.B.I like a couple of idiots. It was like they were venting their frustration of not being able to brag about their genius scheme. I even played along as I put on an expression of awe and got them to tell me how they managed to switch the bags and they were happy to confess all their sins.

But what they didn't expect was that, not only would that lonely lawyer not be scared, he even used a recorder which he always carries on him for these kinds of purposes, as proof that the cartel framed the boy which caught the whole court by surprise. And the F.B.I agents became embarrassed when they heard the part about them being played like a couple of idiots.

After that there was a country wide search for any every Malina cartel member which was also a way for the F.B.I to gain back some face and they managed to use some of the details in the recording to find the drug the stash and some high ranking members which can be considered a win for them.

As for me the hero of all this, I decided that I would take a week off for things to cool down but as a testament to my bad luck, the day I get back here just so happens to be on the same day that the cartel decides to visit me.

They walked with a little hop in their step and a murderous look in their eyes. Although I was terrified I decide to stand my ground and put on a the tough guy act I saw on one of my scariest clients.

Who knows maybe they're a couple of pussies, after a couple of second he plucked up enough courage to yell at them saying, "I'm only going to tell you once and once only, you' all better get up out of my face or else there's going to be hell to pay you hear me, hell to pay!" he decided to use African American Gangster voice because, well just because he felt like it.

When gangsters heard what he said they stop walking and stared at him with a dumbfounded expression and seeing this he couldn't help but smile, how can he, the world's greatest lawyer be stopped by some idiotic group of thugs. Thinking this he became even more emboldened as I decided to scare them a little more so he started to rain curses.

"Did you guys really think that I could be messed with by a couple of dick faces, I mean how can a person have the shamelessness to walk on the streets knowing that they are carrying a dick on their face and you, yea you the one with the big ass lips, your lip is so big that it make the dick tattoo on your face look uncircumcised."

Suddenly the group started shaking in their boots...well I mean shaking in their Jordan sneakers which was pretty expensive by the way, well not actually expensive for me but I expected them to be wearing something like you know, Nike but anyway back to topic even though I have an incredible fashion sense, now is not the time to get into that cause they were crying.

And yes, I mean those gangsters, they are crying while snivelling choking with mucus everywhere they looked like they just lost a family member, maybe I was too harsh on them.

"You! What have we ever done to you? We the malina drug cartel have always kept our consciences clean, even when we **** and kill we still try to do it in a polite way. But you! You are not only disrespectful but also mean, so now we will have to torture you before killing you."

Hearing the words torture and death, my legs started shaking, as I was thinking was I really going to die, no I can't I still have lots to live for like,...like,...well it will come to me eventually.

And after thirty minutes of inhumane torture I finally passed away and this is how the first life of the great nick flames ended.