Unrepentant Chapter 19.2

Chapter 19.2

Chapter 19 … In the end, there will be a day where my body is torn and my bones crushed.

【Part 2】

Lin Si Ze slightly lifted his eyes to glance at Gu Hong Jian, as if he already knew what she was going to say, but didn’t interfere and simply allowed her to continue talking.

“When these letters were mailed, it was coincidentally a month prior to rebellious Minister Yao Bing’s coup. ‘That position’ you spoke of was also clearly not referring to the emperor, because since the emperor had ascended the throne, you have no intention of bringing your family to the capital. Therefore, who ‘that position’ refers to is clear. When the late Emperor had still been on the throne, the crown prince candidate had yet to be determined, but you had been confident then. Evidently, you had long known what was going to happen, so you and Yao Bing had basically joined together!” Gu Hong Jian deepened her voice as she revealed her verdict, “To conspire; this is abundantly clear!”

Assistant Minister Fan stammered and wanted to refute, but he realized he unexpectedly could not!

He could only continue kowtowing, banging his head till his forehead bled, but he was simply sentenced by Lin Si Ze with an indifferent order of ‘Come, drag him down.’

Afterward, Assistant Minister Fan was executed for the crime of conspiring against the throne, as well as all his relatives.

Gu Hong Jian established herself in the imperial court because of this extremely brilliant impeachment.

Assistant Minister Fan was the first one to suggest forbidding her from taking an official post. In the end, he was executed as well as all his relatives.

This impeachment clearly indicated Gu Hong Jian’s method to be exceptional, with the emperor helping on the sly as well. No one was completely pure, so none wanted to take a risk.

There was but one completely pure person, who was in fact Zhao Yun Yuan.

Zhao Yun Yuan, however, merely sought an opportunity in private to puzzledly ask Gu Hong Jian how she came to learn about Assistant Minister Fan’s many crimes.

Gu Hong Jian did not hide this either and smiled as she explained, “He wrote the eulogy yet relied on Yao Bing. Naturally, he could not be a good person. After a little bit of research, you could discover a few misdeeds. As for that crucial letter to his family…ah, that report was actually written long beforehand. He probably had nothing to do with the matter of forcing the emperor to abdicate, in fact, but it was useful, so I brought it up.”

Zhao Yun Yuan was extremely shocked upon hearing ‘useful’ and said, “How…how could you do such a thing?!”

Gu Hong Jian asked, “What’s wrong? Cutting the grass doesn’t eliminate the rootes. The spring breeze will blow and create new life.”

“You…” Zhao Yun Yuan was in disbelief. “Impeaching Assistant Minister Fan, because of his wickedness, certainly doesn’t mean you can brazenly add offenses, especially if your reasoning is that…cutting the grass doesn’t eliminate the roots?!”

Gu Hong Jian blinked and said, “In any case, he didn’t do good things; his family didn’t either…so it’s like that.”

“True, his family had many evil-doers within it, but there were innocent women and children who were also implicated!” Zhao Yun Yuan furiously argued, frowning.

At this moment, Zhao Yun Yuan had already entered the Imperial Hanlin Academy. Gu Hong Jian laughed and said, “Imperial Secretary Zhao really does wholeheartedly read only the holy book; his whole body radiates with an austere, righteous aura, and he harbors benevolence. However, Imperial Secretary Zhao, do you think there is anyone innocent in the matter of that entire family killed by Assistant Minister’s nephew? In addition, countless commoners are bullied and humiliated by influential officials; who is innocent here? A father’s debt is repaid by his son. This phrase has been heard of before by Imperial Secretary Zhao, right? Assistant Minister Fan indulged his family like so, and his nephew’s biological parents as well as the natives of that area also knew of this matter, yet none did anything to intercede. It is clear that none of them are good people. Furthermore, I don’t think this kind of environment will breed noble children. Assistant Minister Fan’s father-in-law’s family has, in fact, committed a lot of wicked deeds as well, but I haven’t spoken of

a single one. I, from beginning to end, believed that the punishment of executing the entire family—through guilt by association—is a very good sentence, because those who do not care about the suffering of others should taste for themselves the feeling of losing all their close relatives and suffer all the pain.”

Zhao Yun Yuan was shocked speechless and could only stare blankly at her.

Gu Hong Jian exercised some restraint, though, and awkwardly smiled. “I’m sorry, I spoke without thinking. You need not take this to heart. Our ways of thinking are different, so let’s not talk about such matters in the future. Assistant Minister Fan has already been dealt with, so talking more is no good. Imperial Secretary Zhao thinks I have done wrong, and I feel no need to make any changes.”

Zhao Yun Yuan wrinkled his brows and nodded. “Mn…”

Gu Hong Jian had gained a widely spoken of reputation because of Assistant Minister Fan’s case, but there were many who felt the same as Zhao Yun Yuan about Gu Hong Jian’s method being too cruel. Gu Hong Jian turned a blind eye to this and continued doing things her own way. Later, if there were any officials who fought against Lin Si Ze’s policies, Gu Hong Jian would silently gathered information about that person and ultimately impeached them.

Gu Hong Jian’s impeachments weren’t all as ruthless as Assistant Minister Fan’s. If it was truly just a simple suggestion, then Gu Hong Jian would overlook it, but if their attitude was disrespectful toward Lin Si Ze, then she would wage battle as an imperial censor and raise trouble. Gu Hong Jian increased the severity of impeachment based on their level of disrespect toward Lin Si Ze.

Some imperial censors were actually rather upright, but because Gu Hong Jian had uncovered many wrongs, Lin Si Ze had no choice but to punish them despite not wanting to. Over time, Gu Hong became near synonymous to ‘hunting dog.’ None knew she was a woman, and any of her tricks or methods to gather all kinds of information about others were left a mystery. Absolutely no one knew why she was so merciless. Sometimes when she impeached others, her words seemed as if she was sentencing them to death, and minor mistakes were exaggerated incessantly.

And if someone looked unfavorably at Gu Hong Jian and spoke of her being female, the following consequences would be even more wretched.

In addition, once even Zhao Yun Yuan’s teacher, Scholar Wang, thought that Gu Hong Jian should be struck with thirty blows of the board until she breathed her last, Zhao Yun Yuan could no longer bear her actions and took the lead to accuse Gu Hong Jian of misconduct, of having the heart of a venomous snake, the nature of a ravenous wolf, until this very day.

But Gu Hong Jian actually left Zhao Yun Yuan alone.

She saw that Lin Si Ze appreciated Zhao Yun Yuan, so she verily appreciated this man. Even if their conduct and attitudes were entirely different, Zhao Yun Yuan had also not mixed selfish motives within the impeachment reports he wrote.

This kind of impeachment was one Gu Hong Jian was willing to ignore. And since she ignored it, Lin Si Ze naturally ignored it as well.

And excluding Gu Hong Jian establishing herself gradually in the imperial court, the more important matter was her and Lin Si Ze’s relationship improving step by step.

She did all these things for Lin Si Ze, and Lin Si Ze understood that. She also noticed all the moments that Lin Si Ze would unconditionally step back for her.

Although Gu Hong Jian entered the court, in order to avoid arousing suspicion, the two spoke together infrequently. However, their infrequent talks and meetings had instead led to a fantastical foundation that could probably be called ‘tacit understanding’ between the two.

Lin Si Ze never spoke about disliking any official, yet Gu Hong Jian always immediately handed over impeachment reports for them.

And although Gu Hong Jian never spoke of those who hinder her path, those who did were quickly enlightened.

Compared with before, when they leaned on each other to survive those arduous years, the present path was far smoother. The two of them could not be as intimate as in the olden days, but even if that subtle barrier existed, it seemed as

as if it could be punctured at any time.

This kind of strange ambience continued all the way till autumn of Píngchāng Year 2, on Lin Si Ze’s birthday. The birthday of the emperor was naturally a day of rest. Gu Hong Jian thought it over that morning and still carried wine into the palace.

Those small number of people with a slightly clever mind all knew Gu Hong Jian was the red man in front of the emperor, so Gu Hong Jian had nothing obscuring her way to his study. Since it was obviously his birthday, Lin Si Ze was reading reports in his study, as usual. When he saw her enter, he raised an eyebrow but was not very surprised. He permitted her to sit to the side as he continued to read reports.

Gu Hong Jian set the jug of wine on the ground and sat opposite Lin Si Ze. She lazily beat back a yawn.

Lin Si Ze unexpectedly took note of her at last and asked, “You didn’t sleep well last night?”

“Mn, stayed last night at High Official Jiang’s household for a while.” Gu Hong Jian beat back another yawn.

Lin Si Ze scowled and said, “Have I not told you to stop doing this.”

Gu Hong Jian said, a constipated look on her face, “Not like I have anything to do anyway.”

Lin Si Ze said, “Go rest first.”

Gu Hong Jian nodded and tugged aside the inner screen above the cushy couch, letting in soft sunlight to stream into the Wen Dao Tang. She yawned again, her eyes soon closing in slumber.

It was dusk by the time she awakened. It was Lin Si Ze’s birthday, but she and Lin Si Ze ate together alone. Gu Hong Jian was strangely content.

Lin Si Ze watched as Gu Hong Jian poured herself and then him a cup of wine and calmly asked, “This time, are you planning to get me inebriated before fleeing?”

Gu Hong Jian, without the slightest of guilty consciences, stated, “Maybe so. Like how I wouldn’t use the same trick twice, you wouldn’t fall for it twice.”

Lin Si Ze glanced at her but remained silent.

Gu Hong Jian continued, “This time, if I want to flee, I will use another means!”

Lin Si Ze snorted coldly.

“Such a laugh frightens others into action.” Gu Hong Jian curled her lips and poured him wine. “Here, drink more.”

In fact, Gu Hong Jian what wanted to say was stifled within her heart, so she did not speak and straightforwardly downed more wine.

Since she drank, Lin Si Ze naturally followed suit.

Like this, with the snow unknowingly drifting down heavier outside the window, with the room becoming warmer, Gu Hoong Jian’s face gradually became flushed, whereas Lin Si Ze’s face reddened slowly as well.

Lin Si Ze kneaded his temples and said, slightly fatigued, “Okay, it really is time to stop drinking.”

Gu Hong Jian glanced at him and drank another mouthful of wine, drawling, “I am still not drunk.”

Lin Si Ze reached out for her glass and said, “Stop drinking.”

Gu Hong Jian suddenly got angry and very unhappily slapped his hand away, saying, “How come a man like you is so confusing?! I want to drink how much I want to drink; you have no right to interfere!”

Lin Si Ze expressionlessly snatched her cup away again and said, “I forbid you to drink.”

Gu Hong Jian: “…”

She was really angry. She originally wanted to get drunk, and with her bright red face, red from anger, she looked as if it was about to explode. However, when she saw how calm Lin Si Ze’s expression was, Gu Hong Jian simply stood up, panting with rage, and walked over to snatch Lin Si Ze’s cup of wine from his side of the table.

Lin Si Ze indifferently grabbed her outstretched hand and said, “What are you doing.”

Gu Hong Jian shouted, “Fuck off for me! I can drink by myself and don’t want to look at you!”

No.” Lin Si Ze unexpectedly revealed an extremely rare smile to her. “Besides, this place is the imperial study. How might you possibly drive me out?”

Gu Hong Jian’s temple veins throbbed, but she remained silent for a long while. She actually didn’t try to fight some more and instead stayed standing there, tears silently streaming down her face, her nose ruddy, eyes reddened—like a small bunny whose carrot had been snatched

been snatched away.

Lin Si Ze: “…”

This was not the first time he had seen Gu Hong Jian cry, but unlike before when he had seen Gu Hong Jian cry while looking so determined to sever all relations, so forbearing, this time was entirely different.

This was weakness intertwined with grief, grief that carried a trace of pity—several sparks of cuteness secreted within the pitiful crying. How could this possibly be a side of Gu Hong Jian?!

Lin Si Ze immediately felt truly intoxicated.

He stood there in a daze, watching Gu Hong Jian cry. For a moment, he did not speak any comforting words, and so Gu Hong Jian cried, before mumbling to herself, “You’re just like this…always snatching away things I care for…”

Lin Si Ze gazed at her and said, “What have I snatched from you? Apart…from this wine cup.”

Gu Hong Jian blankly stated, “You snatched Lin Si Ze away…”

Lin Si Ze didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He sighed, thinking, She really is quite inebriated…

But then he heard Gu Hong Jian say, “Lin Si Ze was snatched away by you, so he is completely different from before…”

Lin Si Ze set down Gu Hong Jian’s wine cup, an unreadable expression on his face, and then lifted his own wine cup to drink a swill. He asked, “Different in what ways?”

Within this large room, Gu Hong Jian was still muttering nonsense to herself, tears still streaming down. “If you hadn’t snatched away Lin Si Ze, how come he became so disagreeable…although he originally was quite horrid, he wouldn’t look at me with that kind of expression…”

Lin Si Ze frowned, drank some wine, then asked, “What expression?”

“Expression of hating me.”

Gu Hong Jian’s voice trailed off. She blinked, and another string of tears began falling.

Lin Si Ze could only continue to nurse his wine.

He already could no longer recall how he looked at Gu Hong Jian that day; after all, it had happened far too long ago.

Lin Si Ze couldn’t even clearly recall Zuo Ning Yan’s appearance or smile.

However, it was true that his state of mind that day had been chaotic. He had been very angry at Gu Hong Jian for not saving Zuo Ning Yan as well. But he wouldn’t call it ‘hate.’

Now, he had calmed down since, and was even more unlikely to blame Gu Hong Jian for this matter. Seeing Gu Hong Jian speak like this to herself, however, unexpectedly made him feel somewhat guilty.

Lin Si Ze readily drank his wine and then stated, “How can I hate you. I like you too much.”

Gu Hong Jian retorted, “My ass! Don’t lie to me! My mind is very clear! Lin Si Ze hates me and looks forward to my death.”

Lin Si Ze had a headache. He asked, “How can this be the same?”

When did he want her to die?!

Fortunately, she spoke up about it.

Gu Hong Jian didn’t openly reply to this response and instead said to herself, “At that time, I said I wanted to leave, and he didn’t stop me…gave me a bit of money and then sent me off. I followed him for thirteen whole years! And then he bestowed money onto me like I am some beggar!?”

Lin Si Ze banged the table. “Nonsense!”

Gu Hong Jian echoed him. “Right?! This man is simply unreasonable!” 1

Lin Si Ze angrily argued, “I am saying you’re being unreasonable! You said you wanted to leave, stole things from my palace to sell for coin, and even cheated others of their money. With you looking so determined to leave, how could I stop you?! Can I even stop you?! It would be better to set you free so as to avoid you feeling unhappy day in and day out at the palace!”

Gu Hong Jian was stunned by his bellow of rage. She stared at him blankly and then copied him, angrily banging the table as well. “What are you doing yelling at me for?! You’re in cahoots with Lin Si Ze! You all are becoming so similar!”

Lin Si Ze rested his hand against his forehead, looking as if in pain. “…”

Gu Hong Jian said, “If Lin Si Ze truly wanted to stop me, how could I possibly leave…since I was young, when have I ever not listened to his words?”

Lin Si Ze, having not expected Gu Hong Jian to suddenly say such a thing, was slightly stunned, was slightly stunned, immediately falling silent.

Gu Hong Jian said, “If he had told me to stay, how could I possibly leave the palace? That day, he had hurriedly sent me away…he sent me away. All because of Zuo Ning Yan…I left for so long, and he was not in the least concerned…Answer me, what kind of person does that?!”

Lin Si Ze sighed and asked, “It’s obvious that Jiang Hai Fu did not choose to correspond with you like so of his own volition; how could Jiang Hai Fu dare to write so many letters to you?”

“Say something that’s actually pleasant to hear.” Gu Hong Jian disdainfully replied, “Jiang Hai Fu didn’t write those letters in order for Lin Si Ze to take advantage of me. Lin Si Ze deliberately told me of a crisis he has to make me go and help him settle matters…I’m quite useful, no, Lin Si Ze doesn’t need to tell me. I myself rushed to go settle the issue! I declared my resolution to leave, but ultimately returned… Did he not know this?!”

Lin Si Ze said, “Lin Si Ze is already the emperor. Does he lack in people to use?!”

Gu Hong Jian paused and then immediately released a bitter laugh. “Right, what you said is right. Lin Si Ze does not lack in men…he has already long departed from the point where he would be helpless without me. He told me this, just on the side, that it was my fault, going to him to help him settle those matters…coming to be a female government official, what a joke.”

Lin Si Ze stood up and grabbed her shoulder. He said, “It’s not like that.”

“Then what’s it like?” Gu Hong Jian raised her head to look at him, the watery glint to her eyes having yet to completely dissipate.

Lin Si Ze looked at her and said, “Yes…I deliberately told you that because I wanted to see if you were as willing to do things for me as before.”

Gu Hong Jian jerked her mouth. “Lin Si Ze, you really don’t…you really don’t…what do you mean…you don’t want me, but you won’t allow me to not want you, right?”

Lin Si Ze looked at her, contemplative. Sure enough, this drunk person was Gu Hong Jian.

Thus, a split second later, he grasped Gu Hong Jian by the chin and kissed her.

The two of them, surrounded by the fragrance of wine, tenatatively touched each other, and like wildfire, things got out of hand, the scorching heat igniting between them. Gu Hong Jian was stunned at first, but then both her hands wrapped around Lin Si Ze’s neck. Somewhat shaky, bewildered, yet enthusiastic, she returned his advances.

Unconsciously, Lin Si Ze’s hand trailed down Gu Hong Jian’s chin to rest at her waist. He wrapped his arm around her waist and discovered her to be slimmer than he imagined. Her waist was so soft, it felt as if it could snap at any moment.

Truly baffling; she obviously had a very unyielding personality, yet her body was so soft.

Lin Si Ze tilted his head, temporarily ending this kiss, and whispered, “I…do not not want you.”

Gu Hong Jian stared at him and didn’t reply. Her arms was still wrapped around his neck, and with a bit of strength, she pulled him down, their lips colliding together once more.

The brazier within that room continued to burn steadily, keeping the temperature warm. Gu Hong Jian lightly fell back onto the cushy couch, Lin Si Ze following, his breath covering her skin—hiding the sky and covering the earth.

Gu Hong Jian, for a split second, gained a trace of sobriety. She suddenly realized what she was doing.

She had run away from Lin Si Ze only to be unable to stop herself from returning to Lin Si Ze’s side; she could only convince herself with her justifications, having told herself that she would return to his side as simply an official.

Like a man, like a brother, helping him, with no other thoughts in mind whatsoever.

She hadn’t been able to achieve this.

She knew this was definitely the greatest mistake of her life.

However, she was powerless to resist and could only helplessly watch herself enter the endless abyss and fall, fall.               

In the end, she would welcome that day when her body would be torn and her bones crushed.

Chapter end