The Ten Years When I Loved You So Chapter 12

 ch12

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It was cold and the snow outside had not melted. Through the large floor-to-ceiling windows, you can see the wind rolling with snowflakes. He Zhishu sat in a nest chair, holding a warm water bag to his stomach while texting.

“Your medicine is still in my car.” the doctor's message read. “Should I bring them to you after work?”

“No need. I will get it tomorrow.” He Zhishu replied.

Another message came in. “I tried calling you several times yesterday, you didn't pick up. Can you answer the phone now?”

He Zhishu smiled, thought about it and said, "I will go tomorrow, then we can talk.”

Ai Ziyu didn't reply anymore. He Zhishu read the news of the meeting. Even as he sat he was quick to get exhausted, so he placed down his phone and took a nap. Later he was awoken by a pinch on the cheeks. He Zhishu opened his eyes and saw in a blur Jiang Wenxu. He felt a bit shy being seen in such an unprepared state, even by his lover. Jiang Wenxu caressed He Zhishu's hair and there was affection in his touch. He was just tired, but he is not ready to give up on their relationship. He Zhishu smiled, revealing a dimple in his left cheek.

“Brother Jiang…” he spoke softly.

After so many years, Jiang Wenxu can speak a standard Beijing dialect. When he had lost is his old accent it was impossible for him to do it again. But He Zhishu retained his accent, stubborn as he is in everything. It has not changed in the past ten years. His words were soothing and it reminded Jiang Wenxu of the Jiangnan water town. He Zhishu fell right back to sleep. Jiang Wenxu groaned, then took a blanket and gently placed it over He Zhishu. He went back to the study room and saw that his phone was vibrating on the desk. He check who it was and saw that it was Shen Zui. He was a bit annoyed.

Jiang Wenxu had been cheating for a long time. At first he pretended to be a bachelor. After all he was a handsome man and unmarried. Even if he didn't go looking for others, others would find him. Later he discovered that wildflowers love the scent of wildflowers. An unorthodox lover had perks and advantages that an orthodox lover cannot provide. He Zhishu is good, but he wasn't experimental in bed. Jiang Wenxu has some nasty fetishes in bed that He Zhishu doesn't want or cannot fulfill. Sometimes Jiang Wenxu is very violent in bed and He Zhishu could not put up with it. But others can. They are more willing to put up with it, no matter how hard it gets.

Cheating is a vice. At first when you try it once or twice, you are uneasy and scared, Later, it becomes a habit. When you go home after doing something bad you treat your lover as Buddha to cover up your fears and deal with your conscience. After some time, the burden of guilt gets less and less and eventually disappear completely. In the beginning Jiang Wenxu would still bother trying to cover it up with excuses when He Zhishu found out. They would have an argument but would end up with He Zhishu held him firmly. He knew that He Zhushi would be obedient to him no matter what he did. But later, Jiang Wenxu noticed that He Zhishu no longer reacted regarding his outside affairs. This made him uncomfortable, but like a bad vice, he kept on doing it still. However, now he felt the tension again, the fear of being found out. But He Zhishu's behavior confused him and he could not figure out what was in his mind. It is as if He Zhishu had grown stronger emotionally, yet physically he looked more fragile, as if he will disappear one of these days.

Jiang Wenxu doesn't like strangers coming to his own home, so he has been doing some snooping. That morning he was very uncomfortable. The bedsheets from last night was thrown in the laundry and left unwashed. Jiang Wenxu saw that was a spot of blood on the blanket and he couldn't help but panic. He knows that He Zhishu is sensitive to pain. He Zhishu didn't used to be so fragile, though he has a special condition. It's easy for him to get scars and can't stand simple bumps. He remembers clearly the first time he was on top He Zhishu, he was in pain and had been shaking, though he did not resist. He Zhishu opened his eyes and there seemed to be a fountain of light emanating from them. He Zhishu gasped, choked and spoke gently.

“Brother Jiang, you should be good to me in the future…”

Jiang Wenxu felt pain in his heart.

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Chapter end