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The Ancestor of our Sect Isn't Acting like an Elder Chapter 176
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The Ancestor of our Sect Isn't Acting like an Elder Chapter 176

176 – Prologue Volume 4, “You Are Unnecessary.”

— “You are unnecessary.”

These words are etched into her heart.

The lass still remembers that whenever she made a mistake or failed, her father would use this sentence instead of reprimanding her. Apart from this, he would not beat or scold her, or much less say anything else to her. It always appeared like she didn't exist, like she wasn't alive in her father's eyes.

This may be a form of punishment.

I must not be unnecessary — the lass firmly believed this once.

Until the thousandth time — perhaps the thousandth time, since she's not sure about the exact number. On the thousandth time when she heard her father say that she's unnecessary, she finally realized that she was wrong, that she was only deceiving herself all this time.

Unnecessary — I am unnecessary.

Subconsciously, this thought took root deep in the lass's heart and stubbornly grew into a deformed flower. She tried to deny it, tried to escape, but everything was in vain.

Because the facts are before her eyes.

When the lass was born, there were complications for some reason. Although the doctor tried his best, but her mother died of dystocia in the end. Additionally, because her twin younger brother was born last, his body has been frail ever since he was little. His legs are very weak, which is why he has to pass his days in a special wheelchair.

Does father think that I harmed mother and younger brother? The lass often entertained this suspicion. But she didn't have the courage to ask, since she was afraid that the answer she'll get is the one she least wishes to hear.

However, in the end, she still couldn't escape that sentence.

“– if it wasn't for you…”

If it wasn't not for her, her mother wouldn't have died and her younger brother would be happy.

Yeah, she is at fault.

— if only she didn't exist.

Although she is alive, but she isn't needed.

There is no meaning, no value in her living, she is redundant.

“You're unnecessary, you're useless.”

I'm sorry — every time she apologized, a scar was etched in her heart.

“Why was it you? Why?”

I'm sorry —

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…

Her heart gradually died as she apologized.

However, no matter how humbly she admitted her mistake, her father never forgave her, and only treated her like air. He would only add another scar to her heart whenever she made a mistake or failed. The scars in her heart gradually increased, until there were too many to count.

I should just die, I shouldn't be alive to begin with.

Not so long ago, this thought once occupied the lass's heart.

She tried to commit suicide. But in the end, she didn't succeed in taking her own life. Her grandfather stopped her.

“Do you want to give up that hard-earned life of yours? This is cowardly behavior. We don't need cowards in our family. Have you forgotten about your mother, who has sacrificed herself to give birth to you?”

At that time, the lass heard a word.

Sacrifice.

Sacrifice yourself for another.

She understood it thusly.

Therefore, she must work hard to become someone useful, to become someone needed. Only then will she get her own “meaning”.

Since that day, she worked tirelessly to learn various bodies of knowledge — the four arts [1], arithmetic, martial arts, and even the art of war. As long as she thinks that it'll be of help to her father, she will learn any body of knowledge, no matter the cost.

Gradually, the situation has changed.

“– why do you work so hard? How can you work hard? How can you succeed?”

Every time she learns something new, she will timidly tell it to her father. Her father will always reprimand, hit, or even abuse her.

However, instead of thinking that she is being maltreated, she feels very happy.

— because her father finally no longer ignores her.

The lass knows, she knows that there must be something wrong with her. She must be sick, must be twisted.

But the pain gives her a sense — a sense of existing in the world.

Her father's scolding and abuse let her feel her existence.

I am not unneeded, I am not unnecessary. At least she can let her father vent.

She was very happy and wanted more. Therefore, she must work harder, work harder to become someone useful, someone needed. As long as this is the case, then her dead mother and ill younger brother may forgive her, forgive her for stealing their happiness.

“– would you like to come with me?”

She still remembers the encounter with the girl in red when her father beat her in public.

The girl asked the lass to go with her.

Why should I go with you? Why are you looking at me with pitying eyes? The lass was puzzled.

Father still needs me!

The lass didn't agree to go with the girl.

However, when the girl squatted down and asked the lass, “Do you want to help as many people as possible?”, she answered without the slightest hesitation, “I do.”

“Then just come with me.”

The lass did not hesitate to agree to go with the girl. Her father didn't object, didn't urge her to stay.

Why doesn't he want me to stay? Ah, it must be that he doesn't need me… then I must go help more people and get their approval.

Um, it does not matter how much she has to sacrifice. As long as the other party needs her, she will rush to the other party's side at all cost and do her best to help.

— “I need you.”

Only when she hears this sentence, can she feel the meaning of life.

No matter the sacrifice, she only lives for others, is happy for others' happiness, grieves for others' grief.

She didn't realize that she has already lost herself in the middle of the dark night and is wandering alone. She just keeps walking on the road that she thinks is right, running in the opposite direction of dawn.

Until —

[1] – four arts

Chapter end

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<<Prev
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Catalogue
Chapter 246 – Epilogue Volume 4, Her Choice
Chapter 173 – Epilogue Volume 3, the Bright Red of that Day (II)
Chapter 172 – Epilogue Volume 3, the Bright Red of that Day (I)
prologue
Chapter 2208
Chapter 271.1 – Grandmaster
Chapter 270.2 – Extravagant Show
Chapter 270.1 – Extravagant Show
Chapter 269.2 – Cang Lin's Real Intentions
Chapter 269.1 – Cang Lin's Real Intentions
Chapter 268 – A Light
Chapter 267 – Domain of Stillness
Chapter 266 – Drunk Dragon
Chapter 265 – Dragon Vanquisher” — Bei Xiaolu
Chapter 264.2 – Beggars' Union
Chapter 264.1 – Beggars' Union
Chapter 263 – Beiming Youyu's Difficulty
Chapter 262 – Envy
Chapter 261 – Hua Dynasty's First Grandmaster
Chapter 260.2 – Are Here
Chapter 260.1 – Are Here
Chapter 259.2 – Grandmaster
Chapter 259.1 – Grandmaster
Chapter 258.2 – Rare Things Are Valuable
Chapter 258.1 – Rare Things Are Valuable
Chapter 257.2 – Motley Crew
Chapter 257.1 – Motley Crew
Chapter 256.2 – Xia Xue Says She Wants to Learn Magic
Chapter 256.1 – Xia Xue Says She Wants to Learn Magic
Chapter 255 – A Desolate Town
Chapter 254 – Used the Same Trick
Chapter 253.2 – The Hall Appeared
Chapter 253.1 – The Hall Appeared
Chapter 252.2 – Oafish
Chapter 252.1 – Oafish
Chapter 251.2 – Angry Li Wanting
Chapter 251.1 – Angry Li Wanting
Chapter 250 – One Year
Chapter 249.2 – Gong Tianqing's Change
Chapter 249.1 – Gong Tianqing's Change
Chapter 248.2 – Disassembled Mechanism Sword
Chapter 248.1 – Disassembled Mechanism Sword
Chapter 247.2 – Preface, First Amongst the Myriad of Weapons
Chapter 247.1 – Preface, First Amongst the Myriad of Weapons
Chapter 245
Chapter 244.2
Chapter 244.1 – The Assassin Five Years Ago
Chapter 243.2 – Bitter Wine
Chapter 243.1 – Bitter Wine
Chapter 242.2  – Nightwalk
Chapter 242.1 – Nightwalk
Chapter 241.2 – Those Who Use Poison Must Be Good at Medicine
Chapter 241.1 – Those Who Use Poison Must Be Good at Medicine
Chapter 240 – A Pinch of Bitterness, Helplessness, Self–blame, and Guilt
Chapter 239 – I Like Older Sister the Most
Chapter 238.2 - – Suddenly
Chapter 238.1  - – Suddenly
Chapter 237 – Boundary
Chapter 236 – Spell Model
Chapter 235 – Unfortunately I Cannot Enjoy
Chapter 234 – Eccentric
Chapter 233 – Mischief
Chapter 232 – Only Gong Tianyang
Chapter 231 – Slip of the Tongue
Chapter 230 – The Place Where She Was Being Held
Chapter 229 – Escape from
Chapter 228 – Decreed by Fate
Chapter 227 – It's Not Time Yet
Chapter 226
Chapter 225
Chapter 224 -
Chapter 223
Chapter 222 – The Long
Chapter 221
Chapter 220
Chapter 219
Chapter 218
Chapter 217.2
Chapter 217.1
Chapter 216.3
Chapter 216.2
Chapter 216.1
Chapter 215
Chapter 214
Chapter 213.2
Chapter 213.1
Chapter 212.2
Chapter 212.1
Chapter 211 – Her Name Is Qi Qiqi
Chapter 210.3 – If I Were a Grandmaster
Chapter 210.2 – If I Were a Grandmaster
Chapter 210.1 – If I Were a Grandmaster
Chapter 209.2 – Loyalty of Four People
Chapter 209.1 – Loyalty of Four People
Chapter 208.2 – It's Shameful to Act Moe
Chapter 208.1 – It's Shameful to Act Moe [1]
Chapter 207.2 – Gong Tianyang
Chapter 207.1 – Gong Tianyang
Chapter 206.2 – Shui Yun'er's Feelings
Chapter 206.1 – Shui Yun'er's Feelings
Chapter 205.2 – Wilting Summer Flower
Chapter 205.1 – Wilting Summer Flower
Chapter 204.2 – I Don't Want to Understand
Chapter 204.1 – I Don't Want to Understand
Chapter 203.2 – Shadow's Purpose
Chapter 203.1  – Shadow's Purpose
Chapter 202.2 – Shift, Alkaid No. 3
Chapter 202.1 – Shift, Alkaid No. 3
Chapter 201.2 – Phantom
Chapter 200.1 – The Meaning of Strength
Chapter 199.2  – A Lofty Ideal
Chapter 199.1 – A Lofty Ideal
Chapter 198.2 – I Missed
Chapter 198.1
Chapter 197.2
Chapter 197.1
Chapter 196.2
Chapter 196.1
Chapter 195.3
Chapter 195.2
Chapter 195.1
Chapter 194.2
Chapter 194.1
Chapter 193.2
Chapter 193.1
Chapter 192.2
Chapter 192.1
Chapter 191.2
Chapter 191.1
Chapter 190
Chapter 189.2
Chapter 189.1
Chapter 188.2
Chapter 188.1
Chapter 187.2
Chapter 187.1 -
Chapter 186.2
Chapter 186.1
Chapter 185.3
Chapter 185.2 – Unswerving Momentum
Chapter 185.1
Chapter 184.2 – Radiance
Chapter 184.1
Chapter 183.2 – Four Guard Forts and Gong Tianqing
Chapter 183.1 – Four Guard Forts and Gong Tianqing
Chapter 182.2
Chapter 182.1 – Sanshoku Dango
Chapter 181.2
Chapter 181.1 – Feverish Li Wanting
Chapter 180.2
Chapter 180.1
Chapter 179.2 – Xia Xue's Trick
Chapter 179.1 – Xia Xue's Trick
Chapter 178.2 – Drunk
Chapter 178.1 – Drunk
Chapter 177.2 – The Gong Family's Affairs
Chapter 177.1 – he Gong Family's Affairs
Chapter 176
Chapter 175 – Interlude, Nighttime Talk Under the Moon (II)
Chapter 174 – Interlude, Nighttime Talk Under the Moon (I)
Chapter 171 – Dragon Vein
Chapter 170
Chapter 169
Chapter 168.2
Chapter 168.1
Chapter 167
Chapter 166
Chapter 165
Chapter 164
Chapter 163
Chapter 162
Chapter 161
Chapter 160.2
Chapter 160.1
Chapter 159
Chapter 158
Chapter 157
Chapter 156
Chapter 155
Chapter 154
Chapter 153
Chapter 152
Chapter 151
Chapter 150
Chapter 149
Chapter 148
Chapter 147.2 – Chihen
Chapter 147.1 – Chihen
Chapter 146.2 – Predator
Chapter 146.1 – Predator
Chapter 145 – Tails
Chapter 144 – Centaur
Chapter 143 – Iron Armored Oxen
Chapter 142 – Unforeseen Event
Chapter 141 – Dilemma
Chapter 140 – Talismans
Chapter 139 – Beiming Youyu's Weak Point
Chapter 138 – Eating on the Sly
Chapter 137 – In the Camp
Chapter 136 – This Is Wishful Thinking to Begin with
Chapter 135 – White Dragon Tongue
Chapter 134 – Jia Lan Appears Again
Chapter 133 – Choices
Chapter 132 – Perception Boundary
Chapter 131 – Gathering (II)
Chapter 130
Chapter 129 – Martial Demon Realm
Chapter 128 – Moonlight Omnia
Chapter 127 – Billows of Light
Chapter 126 – Sword that Refutes Evil
Chapter 125 – Jia Lan
Chapter 124
Chapter 123 – Hard
Chapter 122
Chapter 121
Chapter 120
Chapter 119
Chapter 118
Chapter 117
Chapter 116
Chapter 115
Chapter 114
Chapter 113
Chapter 112
Chapter 111
Chapter 110
Chapter 109
Chapter 108
Chapter 107
Chapter 106
Chapter 105
Chapter 104
Chapter 103
Chapter 102
Chapter 101
Chapter 100
Chapter 99 – Little Vixen
Chapter 98 – Phecda's Power (II)
Chapter 97 – Phecda's Power (I)
Chapter 96 – String
Chapter 95 – Sudden Change of Events
Chapter 94 – Tournament (II)
Chapter 93 – Tournament (I)
Chapter 92 – Phecda (II)
Chapter 91 – Phecda (I)
Chapter 90 – The Past
Chapter 89 – A Selfish Person
Chapter 88 – Behind the Middle Peak
Chapter 87 – Promised Future
Chapter 86 – I Must Talk to Her
Chapter 85 – Tired
Chapter 84 – Item Spirit
Chapter 83 – Agreement
Chapter 82 – Liu Chengzong's Query
Chapter 81 – Sign Up (II)
Chapter 80 – Sign Up (I)
Chapter 79 – Dit Da Jow [1]
Chapter 78 – Lecture on Martial Arts (III)
Chapter 77 – Lecture on Martial Arts (II)
Chapter 76 – Lecture on Martial Arts (I)
Chapter 75 – Opportunity
Chapter 74
Chapter 73
Chapter 72
Chapter 71
Chapter 70
Chapter 69
Chapter 68
Chapter 67
Chapter 66
Chapter 65
Chapter 64
Chapter 63
Chapter 62
Chapter 61
Chapter 60
Chapter 59
Chapter 58
Chapter 57
Chapter 56
Chapter 55
Chapter 54
Chapter 53
Chapter 52
Chapter 51
Chapter 50
Chapter 49
Chapter 48
Chapter 47
Chapter 46
Chapter 45
Chapter 44
Chapter 43
Chapter 42
Chapter 41
Chapter 40
Chapter 39
Chapter 38
Chapter 37
Chapter 36
Chapter 35
Chapter 34
Chapter 33
Chapter 32
Chapter 31
Chapter 30
Chapter 29
Chapter 28
Chapter 27
Chapter 26
Chapter 25
Chapter 24
Chapter 23
Chapter 22
Chapter 21
Chapter 20
Chapter 19
Chapter 18
Chapter 17
Chapter 16
Chapter 15
Chapter 14
Chapter 13
Chapter 12
Chapter 11
Chapter 10
Chapter 9
Chapter 8
Chapter 7
Chapter 6
Chapter 5
Chapter 4
Chapter 3
Chapter 2.2
Chapter 2.1
Chapter 2
Chapter 1.4
Chapter 1.3
Chapter 1.2
Chapter 1.1
Chapter 1
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