I Said Make My Abilities Average! Chapter 406

And… it's that time again. What time? Average time of course.

Hello, it's me again! Shinonome! If you've read chapter 405—if you haven't please read that first—you'll know I got grilled alive by my de-facto boss. I'm sorry for “wasting manpower” and making obscure memes!

That said, it's the summer. I'm bored. I've finished editing 405 too, and since it's been a week with no releases, and there's none lined up on the website… This calls for crappy, Shinonome quality translations~

And thus, without further ado, bon appétit!

Editor: ShinonomeResearchLabs

“Ah, it's so boring… ”

Shortly after the request to escort the merchants-cum-spies to the Albarn Empire was complete, Pauline wanted to go home after a long absence, so the Crimson Vow2 decided to take a long vacation.

During the usual vacation period of about a week or so, Pauline and Mavis didn't have time to visit their distant families. Thus, a three-week-long vacation was planned for the Crimson Vow.

As was planned, Pauline and Mavis both returned home.

Rena went to pay her respects at her friends' graves.

…Lastly, that left Mile, who had no place to go, with a lot of spare time.

“Something to do when I'm alone… Something that takes a lot of time…

…A fairy hunt. That's it!

I've been keeping an eye out for cute little girls… like Mariett-chan who I had fun with.

Oh, maybe I should sneak into school again and check up on her… ” 3

Image of Mariett (see TL Notes)
Almost—no—Mile is a complete stalker.

And as a stalker, Mile's lustful desires must be fulfilled…

“That's a Tarkovsky movie you're talking about! And that only happens in a room, a “Zone” I tell you! And no, it's not a perverted film, but a proper work of science fiction!” 4

Suddenly, Mile let out an inexplicable shout.

Apparently, it seems like I had something to do with it.

“But, I have three weeks worth of free time… Most of the stuff to do in the royal capital can be done on a regular week-long vacation, or even a short break…

Well, since I'm here by myself, I'll try traveling alone!”

Usually, in this world, a girl traveling solo is an exceedingly dangerous affair.

Not just bandits, but local thugs and even the average traveler could get pretty bad ideas if they saw a pretty, defenseless girl walking alone on a deserted highway.

One could happen to pass through rural farming villages that barely have enough to eat as well. Among these, there are malicious villages that attack passing traveling merchants or those where criminals congregate.

In other words, for a little girl to be traveling alone in this world full of dangers is not a sane course of action.

…But it's a whole other story for Mile.

Yeah, because for Mile, that kind of thing doesn't matter at all…

“Alright, time to hit the road!”

And thus, Mile set off on her solo journey, all while humming a questionable impromptu ballad5 in the language of this world.

“Umu, umu. Everything's going pretty well… ”

Bandits and suspicious people had approached her a couple times, but each time, Mile ran. Yes, at full speed.

If for one moment, they thought her image looked blurred, by the next, the girl would already be disappearing into the distance.

…There's no way for them to catch up.

While it's true that if she caught them, went through the procedure, and turned them in at the nearest town, there'll be a bonus payday. However, the process was too troublesome and time-consuming, so Mile decided to not deal with it at all.

Besides, if she got involved with each and every one of them, the vacation would be over in a flash. Even though it was three weeks long, a week in this world had just six days, so that was only eighteen days in total.

However, if it's just Mile alone, the number of days needed for travel is quite small. Even if she walks “averagely.”

As a last resort, Mile could just launch herself in the air and use gravity-altering magic [Cavourite] to make her fall sideways,6 thereby arriving at a destination almost instantaneously, but that would be distasteful and would ruin the experience of traveling. Thus, Mile set a compromise of traveling at twice the average walking speed.

Mile headed southwest from the capital.

Redrawn from the pieces of Loli o Mamoritai's map
In that direction, the borders of three countries met: the Tyrus Kingdom, home of the Crimson Vow; the Brandel Kingdom, Mile—no, Adel's motherland; and the Albarn Empire. As the Tyrus and Brandel Kingdoms had a good relationship with each other but not the Albarn Empire, that place was where the two sides stood off.

Specifically, the Tyrus and Brandel are guarding each other's back, so that should the Albarn Empire seriously invade one of them, the other one will launch a counterattack into the Empire's lands.

…Yes, only in the case of a full-fledged invasion.

If it's not a full-scale invasion as an empire, but just the Empire's nobles on the border having skirmishes using their own territorial armies, there was no need for the other kingdoms to get involved.

If such a thing was done, it was natural that the kingdom to whom the invaded territory belonged would launch a counter-offensive against Imperial territory with the support of other countries too, making the whole affair in danger of escalating to an all-out war at a national scale.

For things as small as skirmishes, nobles were expected to do something on their own, or maybe request for assistance from their own country's national army.

The kingdoms would only dispatch their armies for each other when the Empire started a full-scale invasion aiming for the capital of one of the countries. The finer points have all been outlined in a series of different treaties.

At the point where the border of these three feuding countries met, there was a small town. Since there was no major road passing through it, it was not a very commercialized city, hence its small size.

Well, for exactly those reasons, Mile wanted to see the atmosphere in such a dicey geographic location.

Indeed, for Mile, the Tyrus Kingdom where she currently lived, the Brandel Kingdom which was her motherland, and the Albarn Empire where the dragon village and the base that the scavengers protected is, all of these countries were “places where her friends lived.” Therefore, for senseless killing to occur in any of those places was to be avoided at all costs.

“ …I'm here!”

And so, Mile arrived at her destination at a speed that simply exceeded common sense.

For the time being, Mile decided to head to the Hunters Guild branch for the sole purpose of getting information quickly. She had no intention of accepting an actual request.

“Hmm, there's some unusual news on the bulletin… This is… oi… ”

[There are signs that the Albarn Empire will launch an invasion against the Brandel Kingdom. Be wary of cross-border contractors. However, these acts of aggression are likely the actions of bordering aristocrats, and not the actual action of the Imperial government itself, and is therefore likely to be a skirmish.]

“Yeah, it's too early for the Empire to begin a full-scale invasion… but I wonder who would bring such accurate information and analysis… ”

While muttering such, Mile glanced at the request board.

“Umm, perhaps at a time like this… Ah, there it is!”

[Urgent recruitment – Mercenary – six small gold coins per day – Baron of Aleiman.]

So read the request. The number of applicants and the timeframe were not included, but if one seriously considered the request, they would consult the mercenary guild.

In other words, the reason that such a vaguely worded request is even posted at the Hunters Guild is because…

“It's a Red Request… ”

At Mile's murmur, the nearby hunters gave a bitter smile. One of them elaborated:

“Well, that's about right. The other nobles who dislike facing the enemy directly all use the baron as a buffer zone. Every time there's a skirmish, all the damage falls on the baron's lands, and the others only have to send in a token force to drive off the invaders, or something like that.

Additionally, the baron himself can't go on the offensive either, since his forces are pinned by the enemy. There's nothing he can do about the location of his territory either…

Every time, the fields will be trampled and young women will be taken away. It's the worst imaginable territory there is.

Moreover, if you're a defending soldier or mercenary, since the enemy are marauding bandits, there'll definitely be daily battles, all for the measly sum of six small gold coins per day. To make matters worse, you're only under the employ of a small, weak barony. Your opponents are a territory full of starving peasants willing to fight to the death for their next meal. It's suicidal I tell you!7

At any rate, if you offer yourself as tribute, you'll get put at the front as a disposable pawn. Naturally, no one at the Mercenary Guild's gonna accept it. The same goes for us hunters!”

That hunter spoke bluntly about what he thought of the request.

Well, the hunters there weren't expecting a little girl who looked twelve years old to even consider the request anyway, so that hunter was mostly talking for the sake of the newbie hunters who were still young.

The newcomer girl was too young to possibly be on a training journey. She must be wearing the used equipment that her parents bought her and was just about the register as a hunter. Such were the thoughts in the other hunters' minds.

In particular, there was an all-male party of boys in their mid-to-late teens who kept glancing at Mile. Perhaps they intended to solicit her as soon as her hunter registration was complete.

Mile's equipment wasn't bad for a newbie either, meaning that her parents weren't troubled with money and were supportive of their daughter becoming a hunter.

…And Mile was objectively cute.

Yes, yes, that was the situation here…

And so, Mile went over to the reception desk and told the onee-san there without missing a beat:

“Uh, excuse me. I'd like to accept the mercenary recruitment request from the neighboring country!”

“Eeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhh!?!?!?”

There was a collective shout within the guild. But to be honest, that much was inevitable…

Translation Notes:

Raw says「閑話　灼熱の男１」, which is a reference to chapter 12. They're both titled “Blazing Man,” though the man actually doesn't appear until next chapter. Also, I stole the translation of 「閑話」from Loli o Mamoritai, but I don't know if it's accurate.
I've decided that I like the anime rendition of『赤き誓い』better, so I'm using their translation of “Crimson Vow” as opposed to “Red Oath.” It's technically the official translation too.
Mariett is the girl Mile tutored in the volume two extra (Loli Protector romanized her name as “Mareeta”), and apparently Mile now periodically stalks her because she's a cute loli. Thank you to Knot for that information down in the comments. Picture courtesy of Loli o Mamoritai.
This is a reference to Andrei Tarkovsky, a renowned Russian filmmaker of the twentieth century. Specifically, this refers to a movie he made called Stalker, where at an archaeological site known as the “Zone,” where there supposedly exists a room that grants a person's innermost desires.
Technically, the term here is「演歌」or “enka,” a Japanese musical genre that's supposed to stylistically resemble traditional Japanese music. Please read more about it here. Yes, I know Wikipedia isn't the most reliable source, but I couldn't immediately find a better source, and is misinformation about Japanese ballads really gonna hurt you?
This is a lot of TL Notes. The raw here says「水平方向に落下するという重力遮断魔法(ケイバーライト)を使えば本当にすぐに到着するが」, which is utterly beyond my Japanese ability to comprehend. I'm just taking Loli o Mamoritai's interpretation from chapter 192, which is basically that Mile turns herself into an ICBM. Sugoi.
The raw says「ふざけんな、ってんだよ！」, which is approximately “damn it all, I say!”
Editor's Note:

It's confirmed: FUNsensei is a boomer. Who would make a reference to an obscure Russian film in this kinda literature!? I was so confused about that!! And who listens to enkas!? I should've just left this for the Loli Protector…

Also, the juxtaposition between starving, rioting peasants and cute girls playing fantasy tourist has never been so real. Is this the so-called gap moe?

But seriously, the way the author conveys the suffering of masses of people is kinda scary…

P.S. – On a totally random note, who or what is a Shironeko?

Chapter end