First Player Chapter 972

   "I used to feel." The man said, "As long as you become a god, you can take everything and achieve everything for them."

  Su Ming was silent.

   "They need to survive, so I give them survival. They need trade, so I find a way to open trade for them. They need struggle, and I control them to fight." The man said: "Sixty years in Cloudshang City is too long for me. I have felt sorry for the lost life more than once, and more than once hoped that my life would end, or I would sleep forever."

   "But the moment I was dragged down by you, I suddenly realized that the sixty years of becoming a **** was like an illusory dream."

  “I seem to have loved them like that before, so much that I have nothing left, but I feel that this kind of love is separated by a layer of things, more like watching the fire from the other side. It is loving an image of nothingness, or a sign that is elevated above 'people'.”

   "Now that I am Su Rin again, this kind of love has become stronger, and it seems to have returned to its original appearance."

"However."

  The man stopped talking.

  Su Ming was silent for a long time, and then slowly said: "...Although I don't know the reason, but you failed to go home."

  Su Lin was silent. Under the thick and viscous sunset, his pupils had a golden texture, which made people feel untouchable.

   "Praia doesn't need gods anymore."

  In the long silence, a sound similar to a sigh sounded.

  Su Ming'an didn't know what kind of mood Su Lin had in order to say such words.

  He should be extremely proud, thinking that becoming a **** can bless everyone. Or maybe it's an extreme awakening, knowing that Praia no longer needs the role of "Su Lin". He has taken care of, protected, and loved the land for eighty years, which is equivalent to his lover's hometown, which he cannot leave. Suddenly, there is no "necessity" for him.

   "I dragged you out, and I will send you back." Su Mingan said.

  Su Lin turned his head and looked at Su Mingan with a rare, confused look: "The world game is over, Su Mingan. You can't send me back again."

  Su Mingan shook his head: "It's not over, I'm still in it."

  Su Lin said: "I don't think you are crazy, so you should have a reason for saying this."

  Su Mingan smiled, even the fake Su Rin is the only one who can truly understand his feelings. After all, they were originally the same kind of people: "Yeah, I feel lucky."

   "Lucky?" Su Lin pondered for a moment: "Is it lucky that the world game is over, and the current ending satisfies you. Or is it lucky that the world game is not over yet, and you still have a chance to change the ending?"

  The two looked at each other for a long time.

  No one spoke.

  The long humid wind blows their similar black hair, and the similar eyes reflect the similar eyes of each other.

  As if an invisible bell rang at this moment, Su Rin suddenly understood Su Mingan's eyes: "You really...do you even want to save me?"

   You said you were going to take everyone home.

   Now everyone has gone home.

  You still want to do better and send me home too. Or, you want to save more things.

  How much more do you have to bear.

  How much more do you have to bear.

  Su Mingan?

  But Su Mingan, who was reflected in Su Lin's pupils, spoke slowly:

   “Don't take yourself too seriously.”

   "I don't want to save you."

  That's why they are so alike, they don't even want to accept each other's compliments.

  Su Ming'an turned around, the river was splashing, splashing, white pigeons were perched on the blue and white railings, fishermen were yelling to draw in their nets, and boat whistles came from a distance. These blue, pure white, colorless, sounds, scenery, human beings and smiles coexist harmoniously at this moment, abundant and bright, as if meeting for the first time, and reuniting after a long absence.

  Su Lin put his hands in his pockets in the long wind, watching the young man leave. A khaki trench coat flapped in the wind. He may be recalling that in the world of ruins, he was also wearing a khaki windbreaker, looking for traces of his homeland in a strange world. Perhaps what he was thinking of was the blue sky of Praia, the azure blue blended with pure white similarly, the fisherman cast the net, and the boat whistled—

  —And on that day, a young man came from afar from a piece of blue and pure white, and met him for the first time holding the sword of Arman.

   That's how it all started.

  Youth today are still on the road.

  He said he was going to take him home.

  Su Lin laughed, turning his back to the young man. He was still looking at the endless river below. Su Mingan's hometown is some distance away from the sea, so Su Lin stayed by the river to reminisce about the past.

   is that he doesn't want to be too far away from this patient. Although for this reason he will never say.

  Su Mingan went to Nuo Er's house.

   This is not Nuoer's home in Yu Country, but a new home built for Nuoer by Lu Shu and others, right next to Su Mingan's residential building. In the room, there is a refrigerator full of desserts that Noel likes, pictures of the children, and colorful glass decorations.

  Su Mingan sat in this room for a long time until the night fell completely.

  He had an illusion that Noel seemed to be in this room, breathing with him.

   He doesn't know why, this future Noel died.

  Lu Shu said that Nuo Er failed to get out of the world game. So they built a memorial room for Noel, filled with things Noel liked.

  Su Mingan turned around in the room, and he saw Noel's crow, placed in the garden, was a one-to-one imitation plush crow toy. He leaned over the huge crow and felt a strange warmth, like a sun that didn't shine.

  He saw pictures of children plastered on the wall. These were not real portraits, but the faces of children drawn by Yamada Machiichi in a realistic way. They were all the children of the New World Guild... who were taken care of by Noel. They should be growing healthily in some corners of the world at this time. Although the children no longer remember, for a year, a man named Noel took care of them in their bewilderment until they came out of this tragic game safely.

  He suddenly found flowers growing in this vacant garden. It wasn't planted by Lu Shu and others, but the flowers grew by themselves. Perhaps a white bird once flew here and accidentally dropped the flower seeds, or perhaps the long wind once passed here, bringing the vitality of the flowers.

   Lush, brilliant sunflowers.

  Su Mingan looked at these sunflowers clinging to the wall. In the empty room, only the photos of the children were glowing with reflections. No one took care of these flowers, so they bloomed willfully and presumptuously. They climbed over the low wall and over the gate, almost going into the room arrogantly.

  They climbed all the way until they got close to a photo pasted on the top of the wall—a blond boy smiling brightly, gesturing "yeah" to the camera. The sunflower stopped growing wildly at the edge of this photo, and a blooming flower quietly bloomed at the edge of this photo.

  Even Nuoer's flowers grow vigorously and restrained, very much like himself.

  Su Mingan took down a sunflower and placed it on the crow's forehead, as if he had put something in his heart.

  Under the night, the garden full of flowers named "Sun" still does not bow its head. That boy himself is a person who is good at holding his head up and smiling in the darkest time.

  Su Mingan lowered his head slowly.

  …I will not let this possibility happen.

Do my best.

  He turned around, turned his back to the garden full of sunflowers, and walked forward.

  He still couldn't hear the voice of the gods, as if the dream hadn't ended yet.

  At night, Su Mingan lay on the bed, silently staring at the ceiling.

  There were footsteps outside the door, and the girl came in. Because Su Mingan would often go crazy in the middle of the night, Yueyue would take care of her on the floor next to her. Lu Shu and others were also sleeping not far away.

  Yueyue doesn't think it's offensive to sleep close. She is taking care of a patient, a friend who is connected with her soul, and the eyes of the world cannot pierce her soul.

   Lying in the same room, the moonlight also looks gentle. Su Mingan opened his eyes until the rustling on the ground stopped.

  The girl was lying on the bed, and a gentle voice sounded:

   "In the future, when you graduate from university, let's go on a trip together. Together with Lu Shu, Nuo... Lin Yin, Yamada Machiichi, Lu, and Mo Yan."

  Because Su Mingan has been inseparable from medicine, they have never traveled together.

   "Okay." Su Mingan said.

   "We can go to the country where we live for a long time, or other countries, Luna also welcomes us." The girl said.

   "I don't like places that are too cold. The place should not be too cold." Su Mingan said.

   "Well, I don't like it either. It's not good if it's too hot or too cold. I really like the four seasons of Longguo."

   "The place where we live for a long time, the economy does not need to be too prosperous, as long as it is enough for daily living."

"Can."

   “Also, the traffic doesn't have to be smooth. Sometimes, it's nice to enjoy a slow life.”

"good."

   "There can be beautiful scenery around the residence, and it doesn't matter if you don't. You are already a beautiful scenery in my eyes. Anywhere, it's good to have you with me."

   "Yes, we are always by your side."

   "It's better to have a lot of flowers near your residence. As I remember, Lin Yin likes flowers. If there is delicious food, that's good too. You like to eat snacks with different styles."

"good."

   "Is there such a place?"

   "Yes, we will definitely go..."

   Yueyue's voice stopped.

  Her voice was interrupted by Su Mingan's movements. She saw Su Mingan sitting up, with disheveled hair, clenched fingers, and water in his eyes.

  In the darkness, the young man's vision trembled, his pupils reflected her, reflecting the melting moonlight.

   "Will there be such a place?" He asked again, even his voice became stagnant.

   "Of course." Yueyue said.

  The world is big, we are still young, there is always enough time, and there is always a place to go.

   "Could it be? Would it be possible...?" he said.

"certainly."

   “Will I have… a long, long future?” he said.

"certainly."

  His pupils have been constricted, as if listening to a moving and distant fairy tale.

   They continue to imagine the future.

  She said that she still wants to learn more musical instruments. By then, she alone will be equivalent to a music troupe. It will definitely be very interesting to play for him.

  She said that Lu Shu wanted to dye his hair black recently. After all, he has returned to society now. He is no longer a homeless man despised by others. His white hair always attracts attention. He wants to become a swordsmanship teacher in the future.

  She said that Yamada Machiichi had already graduated ahead of schedule. He aspired to study psychology in Longguo. He wanted to study psychology and become a psychologist in the future to enlighten more children who were confused about gender. He wanted Dongxue to bravely become Yangxia from now on.

  They talked little by little, like whispers before going to bed, gradually adding a little bit of imagination about the future to this imagination, like children building sandcastles, until they build a future that satisfies them all.

  The moonlight is silent, and the hour hand is getting closer and closer to twelve o'clock.

   Su Mingan suddenly had a premonition of parting.

  He looked at Yueyue, she was lying in a warm bed with medicine and water beside her. Seeing him looking over, her eyes also glistened with melting moonlight.

   "Ming An?"

   "The observer can come back, right?" Su Mingan said.

   "Yes, I'm right here." Yueyue said.

  Su Mingan was silent.

   After a long silence, he spoke softly.

"That's good."

"That's good…"

  At this time, footsteps came from the door. Lu Shu and Lin Yin walked in in their pajamas: "Su Mingan..."

   I don't know why they have this premonition, but Su Mingan seems to be disappearing.

  Su Mingan closed his eyes. He knew that this was still a trick of the gods. If he "recognized" this possibility and chose not to leave, he would be completely immersed in this dream, and maybe he would never wake up again.

  …no more, wake up?

  He suddenly laughed. More than once, when he was on the verge of collapse, he imagined that if he really died completely one day, it might be a kind of relief. The current fantasy dream makes him feel happy. If he is really immersed in this fantasy dream and does not wake up, it will really... satisfy his occasional wish.

but.

  He slowly got out of bed, the moonlight shining on his face.

  Yueyue stood up and held his hand tightly. She didn't say anything, but just put her hand on his wrist. It seemed to pull him tight, but also to push him away.

  Her eyes are still the moonlight that belongs to her alone.

"sorry."

He said.

  Slowly moved her hand away, falling into the melting moonlight in her eyes.

  He opened his mouth in the deep ocean, choking salt water down his throat, completely blocking the last…possibility of his lively, unfamiliar voice from himself.

  As long as you go home. That's fine. What I'm glad is not that I can follow you into the spring, but that I still have the chance to save people who are lost in the winter.

  He swallowed bitterly, and said silently with a smile—

sorry.

  I can't escape.

  Yueyue's eyes began to fade.

   "This is the source of misery in your life," she said.

  Everything began to lose color, the sweater on Lu Shu, the drawing board in Yamada Machi's hand, Lin Yin's guitar, Mo Yan's wooden sword, and Yueyue's eyes... the clear, beautiful, and tearful moonlight.

   "But I wish you a bright spring day...Ming An."

  The future that the two of them had built little by little collapsed.

  The distorted vortex reappeared in Su Mingan's field of vision. He gulped down the bitter seawater, and was dragged into the deep sea bit by bit by the indescribable burden on his body. What was dragging his feet? He knows better than anyone else.

  Su Mingan.

  Who is Su Mingan?

  Hearing his pounding heartbeat and touching his hot tears, he understood the answer to this question like never before at this moment.

   It was like falling into the deep sea, the sea water invaded his senses, and the infinitely extending pain shattered everything in front of him, and the figures of Yueyue and others were shattered and disappeared.

  He stumbled forward, his eyes were dim black and white, but he didn't hug anything, and was splashed with warm blood out of thin air—who did he think he could hug?

  Perhaps even the organizers never thought that someone would be able to confront them with a mortal body.

  So this mortal never thought that this road would be so difficult.

  ——He opened his eyes in the sinking deep sea, and saw the silent **** in front of him.

  The expression of the **** remained unchanged, and only one minute passed by the clock on the wall, as if the first player really only had a short and unreal daydream.

  He was breathing rapidly, but there was still warmth and solidity in his chest.

  Colorful flowers bloom in his heart, and the figures of people are stored in it forever, no matter what, they will never fall.

  He felt himself very light, as if frozen into an empty shell called Salvation. He felt very heavy again, and countless lives sank in his heart.

he does not know.

  —How could a dream of going home move him so much.

he does not know.

  Maybe he knew.

   "Do you feel hopeless?" The **** said: "Its name is HE. After returning home. No one remembers what you have done, no one remembers who you are, and you even lost your most trusted friend. This is your future... It made you a nightmare, sorry."

  The corners of Su Mingan's eyes were so dry that there was no tear.

  He feels that his life is like a movie without an end, and even short dreams cannot appear in the plot.

  —Drink wisdom like a sword of balance. Do not escape, do not sink. Be lenient in the world, no matter you like it or hate it.

  The savior who is willing to suffer bears the expectations and blame of the world—

  So blood was everywhere, blooming into flowers.

  After a long silence, Su Mingan spoke very softly.

   "God."

  The gods watched him.

   "I..." Su Mingan said:

  He looked at the moonlight outside the window. Flowing, clear, moonlight like her.

   “I love this story.”

  The story you told me is my own story.

   I adore this...

  He closes his eyes, suppressing a stifled, moonlit smile.

"…fairy tale."

Chapter end