A Cheap, OP Brawler 22 Chapter 22: A Suspicious Breakfast with a Lord

I apparently couldn't get 'it' down until after four rounds before I could actually do nature's business. I didn't realize until then, but even back home, I didn't really relieve myself for quite a while. Sure, I had a lot of emotional stuff going on to not really get in the mood, but still. My heart's still going at a concerningly fast pace, but I'm able to think straight for now.

<"Being able to wield me without getting possessed, and then handling your libido like this. If you didn't look like such a mess of a virgin right now, I'd be impressed, especially with how much you got in that 'snake' of yours,"> the tanto girl says as I wash my hands and face with cold water.

Shut it. It's bad enough that I'm terrified of what I might do right now, I don't need some bitch talking down on my virginity.

<"Wait, you really are a virgin?! How old are you?!">

22.

<"How have you lived with yourself to this point?!">

I was kept busy with my jobs and fights back home, and I didn't have much time of leisure to worry about romance. I had problems with girls anyway, so I've never played the dating game, okay? Laugh at me if you want, I've numbed myself from the derogatoriness.

<"…">

I'm just gonna get through this breakfast, get what needs to be discussed out of the way, regroup with Ren and Erizora, and then figure out how I can save myself without getting any innocent girls involved.

<"For the record, I wouldn't exactly call those body-warming handmaidens 'innocent,' but all right, I'll be curious to see what you can come up with.">

After taking a few deep breaths and drying off, I put my shirt back on and went back to the room on the couch where Ashe and Salelia kept my spot open. On the table next to the lidded platter is a large plate of a freshly cooked breakfast with eggs, bread, some fruit, and a cup of tea. There's also a pitcher of water and two empty glasses.

"There you are. Are you feeling all right, Jinma? You've been in there for a while," Ms. Tephalia says with her own plate of breakfast in her hands.

"Yeah, I'm fine, had to take a load off before I could relax. Sorry for worrying you, but you might want to clear some space." Not the most attractive thing anyone could say, I know, but with the handmaidens complying and sidling to the ends of the couch, I could at least have some breathing space with this. I take the pitcher and pour water into the glass.

"Oh, I could've—"

"It's fine, Ashe, I got it. Thanks," I interrupt her before taking a nice chug and sit down before picking up my plate. "Aren't you two going to eat, though?"

"We already ate," Salelia answers.

"All right, then. Now, I appreciate the warm and generous hospitality you and your attendants have provided, Ms. Tephalia, and I'd love to relax and chat, but I remembered while I was in there that I have many things to take care of today, so if we could speed this along and get what needs to be discussed settled, I'll take Ren and Erizora and be on my way." I then take my plate and practically inhale its contents without even savoring its tastes.

"W-What's the rush?"

"Is there someplace you need to be?" Salelia and Ashe ask respectively.

"Shumhig lah dah," I answer with my mouth full.

Again, not the most attractive sight to see, but also in my favor to keep the girls from their distance, and it's true I need to be at a place … as far away from here as possible for their safety.

"… The tanto's curse did do something to you, did it?" Ms. Tephalia suddenly asks, her calm regal air from before now turning serious, which I admit is quite impressive to pull off with the getup she's wearing. "That's actually part of what I want to discuss with you."

… Gokun.

Feeling like my cover's blown, I subconsciously take a loud, hefty gulp of whatever food I had in my mouth.

Crap!

<"Well now, didn't take long for her to catch on, did it?"> the tanto girl says in my head.

"R-Really? How so? Not that there's anything wrong with me, nothing serious for that matter," I say as I set the now empty plate down. The handmaidens' eyes widen from how quickly I got through it all.

As much as I'd rather savor my food, I learned how to really eat quickly to make deadlines back home. Glad this helped in this situation as it's sort of an emergency.

"So, there is something," Ms. Tephalia presses.

"As I said before, nothing serious. Nothing, it's even a little ridiculous and stupid, not worth mentioning at all."

"Even so, precautionary measures are needed to be taken. Girls."

"W-Whoa! Hold up!"

At Ms. Tephalia's command, my arms are suddenly coiled and held over my head by Salelia's snake body, while Ashe's bound my legs.

<"Well, this escalated quickly.">

Ms. Tephalia sets her plate down, then moves the coffee table to the side with ease thanks to her own violet snake body before approaching me. "Along with being the lord of Dondegarm, I and those before me in my bloodline have served as guardians of sorts to keep the cursed tanto sealed away. We're aware of some of the side-effects the curse brought to its previous holders, and believe me when I say that I was very hesitant in letting your slaves stay by your side for protection. Even when I tried to reason with them, they were stubborn, and their slave merchant, whether by boldness or foolishness, I'm not sure, wanted to honor their wishes."

They … wanted to be with me that much, even after knowing the dangers?

"Honestly, you surprised me the most when I found those slaves unharmed. After hearing what Ashe and Salelia said about you when they felt you up, I'm impressed you managed you kept in control for this long despite your fast heart rate."

Wait, is that what they were feeling me up for?! Couldn't they have mistaken that for me being really nervous around them partially naked?! Because I was!

<"I've seen enough back in my days to know that virgins can almost always be quite anxious at their first times. It was always quite adorable, really shows how much of a sweetheart they were, like you!">

Don't patronize me at a time like this!

"It's a shame, really. I wanted you to relax a little so we could talk, but since you're so in a rush to get down to business, there's no helping it, I suppose." Ms. Tephalia then puts her hands on my shoulders and starts coiling her snake body around my human one, from my hips to my feet, taking Ashe's place before she presses her voluptuous chest on me. They weren't as big as Erizora's, maybe around Ms. Obina's size from what I remember of her appearance, but they were big with a soft, yet firm enough texture that could make any guy melt if they're making contact with them like I am.

I wonder my heart's getting ready to explode from how fast it's going as Ms. Tephalia moves into my ear.

"I'll give you one chance, Jinma Kotori. Tell me what it is you're holding back, and I might let you live for a little longer. I only want what's best for you and my citizens … hm?"

Ms. Tephalia pulls back and strokes a hand down her hips, then patting mine before looking down. "Is there … something hard poking me down there?"

"Eh? I don't see anything sticking out from anywhere," Ashe says as she searches us with her eyes.

"For the record, his arms suddenly got a lot more difficult to keep restrained. I think I could use some help here," Salelia says.

Oh … fuck. I couldn't bear to look at what's going on, so I tightly closed my eyes.

I could feel Ms. Tephalia pulling back further and reaching down to the 'hardness' between us. A shiver runs down my spine when she touches it, and from how much contact we were making, I'm sure she felt it as well. "Jinma, are you—"

"I'm so sorry but I've been so fucking horny since I woke up that I think I'm going insane! My mind raced with thoughts of how I should have my way with you and the other girls just from looking at you all every second! Ever since Erizora forced my hand into fondling her chest, I thought I was going to lose it every other minute! The same thing for how Ashe and Salelia were feeling me up, but they were just playing me while doing their 'jobs,' were they?! Would anyone blame a stupid virgin like me getting so flustered over that?! Yeah! A scary tough demon-eyed bastard in his early 20's like me never got with a girl! Laugh it all up! I'm ashamed enough as I am having such despicable thoughts of ravaging beautiful girls against their wills like you all! Not even death does me enough punishment for what I deserve! Do what you will, just please make these shameful urges stop—mmph?!"

I jolt my eyes open when I feel something press against my lips, only to see Ms. Tephalia's closed while we're close enough for our noses to touch.

I realize then that we're currently kissing.

Gokun.

The shock makes me gulp a large quantity of strange, tasteless fluids that went down my gullet before I feel something unusual invading the insides of my mouth. It scours everywhere inside, paying special attention to my tongue, and more fluids that were different from the first batch went down my throat.

<"Daaaaamn~. I heard the stories, but Lamia tongues are more impressive than I thought when it comes to kissing.">

This is Ms. Tephalia's tongue?!

As if answering the scream in my head, Ms. Tephalia pulls back from her kiss, along with her tongue that's coated with our saliva, revealing to be at least a whopping 15 centimeters [~half a foot], from the tip to her lips that are formed in a smile. Her cheeks are still tinted red from earlier, too.

Did I … seriously lose my first kiss from that?

<"Seriously?! Dude, how big is your cherry that we're working to pop here?!">

Ms. Tephalia giggles before pulling her tongue back in her mouth, her lips and eyes smile with a sort of glint.

"If you're fine with an old lady like me, I'll be sure to take good care of you on your first time when you wake up."

"… Huh? Wake up? But I don't feel tired?"

The three Lamias stay in place with widened eyes when they realized how much time has passed.

"Um … I'm pretty sure I asked them to bring the right 'stuff,' did I?" Ms. Tephalia asks.

"I saw it!"

"They even said they'd give you one potent enough to put a Minotaur to sleep, and he inhaled the whole thing," Ashe and Salelia say respectively.

Wait, was there something in my breakfast?

<"Oh, yeah, apparently she put some sleeping drug in it for safety measures in case something goes awry. It's supposedly pretty potent and fast-acting.">

And you didn't bring this up to me because …?

<"Hey, I was busy talking with you in the toilet. I can only be aware of so much in my surroundings, you know? And I was more interested in how this would develop.">

"Well … do you feel any different at all? Any place tingling?" Ms. Tephalia asks.

"Other than how my dick is rock hard and my urges to have my way with you grew from that kiss, no." That, as well as my anger from whatever bullshit she's trying to pull. Whether that's the curse's influence at work or not can be debated.

Tephalia's face pales. "You … wouldn't happen to have the 'Poison Resistance' skill, would you?"

"Yes … level 7, if you're wondering—"

[You have now reached 'Poison Resistance' LV 8!]

"… Scratch that, it leveled up to 8 just now," I say after skimming through the notice screen that appeared between us.

""Level 8?!""

KSHAAA!

Suddenly, the door crashing down give the three Lamias a jump in fright.

"Let our master go!"

"Ren?!"

From the veil of dust clouds, Ren jumps out and into the room before throwing sand at the Lamias.

Zasha! Zasha!

"Augh! My eyes!"

"I can't see!"

"What's going on?!"

Within the confusion, Tephalia loosens her grip enough to drop me.

"Get away from him!"

Don!

"Glk!"

Kshaaa!

Erizora then jumps out of the dust cloud and charges right at Tephalia's side, tackling her hard enough to crash the coffee table into many pieces, as well as the tableware that flew from it.

In slow motion, I could see the tanto and a glove with peculiar marks launch out of the platter and into the air. As if by some force, my hand is pulled towards the cursed weapon.

"You buffoon of a slave! You dare attack our lord?!"

"You'll pay for that!"

"Big talk for someone trying to kill the very person who saved their fucking lives!"

"You're the buffoons if you think you can get away with that!"

"ENOUGH!"

Shing!

At my yell, I grab and pull the tanto out of its sheath before tapping into its powers with my magic.

""Gyaaaugh!""

Purplish-black tendrils sprout from every shadow in the room, ensnaring all the girls, including Ren and Erizora. They're held aloft in the air with their arms, legs, and snake bodies bound by the vines of darkness while many more still wriggle about.

"Somebody's going to tell me what the fuck is going on, or every girl in this room will experience the most violent tentacle play that no Japanese person would ever want to experience or see, and believe me, I will not be able to hold back once I snap!"

<"I'm all for the tentacle play!">

"I don't know what a 'Japanese' is, but that sounds very unpleasant!" Ren exclaims.

"T-Tentacle play …"

"Eri, for the Immortals' sake, wipe that look off your face! This is not the time for you to fall into your delusions!"

Chapter end