Chapter 1

He sat on the balcony and silently smoked a cigarette.

He could still faintly hear the sounds of water coming from the ensuite in the bedroom.

There were many instance when he would have the impulse to jump off this tall building, and be buried in the city’s riot of colours. He didn’t have suicidal thoughts, he just enjoyed this self-imagined pleasure.

He closed his eyes and slightly lifted his head. Perhaps he really was falling down… falling down.

The cigarette between his fingers burnt to its end. It was so hot he quickly let go of it.

The cigarette end fell on the floor spilling starry sparks. He bent down ——

A man’s voice resounded behind him, “Wen Qing, I’ve finished showering.”

He paused for a second before continuing his actions and put out the cigarette on the marble floor.

He softly replied, “Oh.”

He stood up and placed the cigarette end into the ashtray next to him. He then turned around and looked at the man with a faint gentle smile.

—

After they entered the room, the two people went for a round. After the man had finished cleaning him up, he was already lying in the man’s embrace sound asleep.

He looks extremely tired recently, thought the man as he sniffed the faint smell of cigarette smoke on his body.

Perhaps the other still didn’t know about the affair between him and that boy.

Luckily.

If Wen Qing knew…the man furrowed his brows. He couldn’t make the promise that he would never sleep with anybody else. He couldn’t control himself. To break up with Wen Qing was even more impossible. They had already been together for twelve years…twelve whole years.

Why did time just fly by so fast?

The man’s gaze softened again as it carried hints of lingering emotions. He slowly stood up and carried him back onto the bed where they slept in each other’s embraces.

Like lovers who had never been estranged.

T/N

Rui: Hello! New project!

There are a few warnings:

1. The chapters in this novel are short

2. The ending can be interpreted as either BE or HE (however, the author wrote the novel under the classification of BE)

Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 2

When Wen Qing woke up in the morning, Yan Han had already gone to work.

Wen Qing stretched his hand out and touched the cold bed sheets next to him. He then gradually moved his hand upwards with feelings of nostalgia from when they were deeply attached in love, and hugged onto Yan Han’s pillow.

There were many times when he had also wanted to pretend like nothing had happened. He also wanted to pretend like he didn’t know anything.

Sudden feelings of being fed up erupted, and Wen Qing violently threw Yan Han’s pillow onto the floor.

The pillow fell onto the wooden floor with a soft, fluffy sound.

It was like how perfunctory new complications were after the twelve years they spent with each other.

Perhaps, this time he could endure it again like before?

What else could he do if he didn’t endure it?

Have a fight? Make him cut ties with the boy?

If he cut ties with this one, there would be another.

He was already tired of the never ending fights where he never got the ending he desired.

Perhaps he could break up with him?

To put things right once and for all.

That’s right, once and for all. He lifted the corners of his lips in self mockery.

—

At night when Yan Han pulled Wen Qing into his embrace, Wen Qing disliked the proximity and instinctively pushed Yan Han away.

The atmosphere instantly became a bit awkward. Yan Han grabbed Wen Qing’s hand and stroked his thumb knuckle a few times, “What’s the matter? Feeling sad?”

Wen Qing took a deep breath in, “No, I’ve been very tired these days.”

Yan Han smiled, “You stay at home from morning till night and you don’t even go out for a walk. You’re going to suffocate from staying inside all the time.”

Wen Qing retrieved his hand back, “Yeah.” He turned around to face his back towards Yan Han.

Yan Han’s hand swept onto his hip and Wen Qing said, “It’s quite late. Work has been busy for you these days… go to sleep.”

Chapter 3

Wen Qing went out for a walk the next day.

He went to the book cafe in the morning and played with puzzles for half a day before going to watch a movie in the afternoon.

He didn’t go to a cinema though. Instead, it was at a place that was similar to those shops back in the 90’s that played video tapes.

You chose a few movies, and had a room to yourself.

It was still the era of video tapes twenty years ago.

Next door was a young couple. He didn’t know what movie they were watching, but every now and then, wild sounds of European and American woman groaning would echo as they were mingled with a few unclear ‘oh god’ ’s.

Later, these sounds were drowned out by the unrestrained pants, and the sounds of skin slapping together.

Wen Qing lit a cigarette.

He breathed in a huge mouthful of smoke before slowly exhaling it out.

The male protagonist on the screen was chasing a bus. Wen Qing lifted the corners of his mouth and laughed. How young.

When he went back, he bought some groceries from the supermarket along the way.

He didn’t want to eat any dinner himself. It was for Yan Han.

When Yan Han came home and saw the dishes on the table, he smiled at Wen Qing in a doting manner.

“How did you know I was going to come back for dinner tonight?”

“I guessed.” Wen Qing sat on the other side of the dining table and smoked.

“Are our hearts and minds connected?” Yan Han lifted one eyebrow up.

Wen Qing nodded his head a few times and pinched the cigarette to put it out.

He had to admit that Yan Han did indeed look pretty handsome. Each and every move he made emanated nothing but the charm of a mature man.

He still wasn’t sick of looking at him after all these years. No wonder there were so many young boys who flocked to Yan Han one after the other.

Wen Qing took out another cigarette and lit it.

Yan Han looked at Wen QIng, “You ate already?”

“Yeah.”

“Your cigarette addiction seems to be quite bad recently.”

“I guess.”

“It’s best if you smoke less. You were the one who kept screaming for me to quit smoking before. How come you’ve started smoking now, just after I’ve pretty much quit.”

Wen Qing squinted his eyes and smoked his cigarette. He remained silent.

Yan Han’s appetite was pretty big. He had eaten an assortment of all the dishes on the table.

After he waited for Yan Han to put his chopsticks down, Wen Qing stood up and tipped the leftovers into the rubbish bin.