Princess Bibliophile Vol 1 Chapter 1.2

Don’t blindly believe in rumours. But, I also knew that I had the facts to corroborate this. 

In Southlynd Kingdom, men and women are considered adults at the age of 18. But even if the woman is a minor, it is possible for partners to get married when the man reaches adulthood as long as they don’t act indecently. However, His Highness has postponed our marriage by telling people that I am still young.

And, he doesn’t bring up the topic of marriage even when I reached the age of 18. That might have increased the credibility of the rumours. 

But it can’t be helped.

The exchange between His Highness and I are based on the merits we can gain from each other. It is impossible for him to welcome a lady as a princess consort when she hasn’t even received the proper education.

We harboured no feelings of love between us, and are just cooperating together to ward of marriage requests from other men and women. 

And now…

As if I was reading a book, I knew that a day would come when His Highness would break off the engagement, and I realise that that day has come. 

The other person with His Highness is from a Viscount House and she had just recently entered the inner palace to learn good manners through apprenticeship.

There are many reasons for why a noble lady would go to the inner palace for apprenticeship: getting ready for married life, add value to themselves before getting engaged, or for job hunting.

Even noble ladies need to work depending on the situation at their house.

Amongst those reasons, I hear that ladies admire the position of lady in waiting or maid. The prestige of serving a high-ranking noble, the opportunity to meet a promising gentlemen who works at the royal palace, or perhaps, having a member of the royal family fall in love with you at first sight like in a romance novel. The chances of these things happening was by no means zero. 

I think the name of the Viscount Lady is Irene Pascal.

Recently, I have encountered this lady many times. 

The first time I saw her was at the royal palace archives. It started when I overheard a conversation about her from the archive staff. 

――― Recently, there’s an adorable lady learning good manners through apprenticeship, they whispered. 

She has chestnut hair that looks soft to touch and light brown eyes that charm anyone who looks at them. She is an attractive, pretty and sociable woman with a voice that people don’t get tired of listening to. 

I got the impression that she is the exact opposite of me, and I remembered the face of the lady who often appeared in the archives on errands for the inner palace. 

That happened when I noticed that the ladder had been chipped and went to look for someone to tell. I peeked into the break room when I heard the voice that resounded from within. 

Thereupon I smelt the scent of tea leaves that floated around the room, and saw Miss Irene panicking as she picked up the tea utensils which had fallen all over the place. 

“Please excuse me for… my carelessness, Sir Theodore.”

“No… it’s nothing serious.” The person who replied is the manager of the royal palace archives, His Royal Highness Theodore.

He is the younger brother of the current King, but since they are years apart in age, it is more fitting to call him Prince Christopher’s brother. 

He is still single even though he is a member of the royal family. He has dark golden-brown hair and ultramarine eyes, and is impressively popular with his middle-age charm.

“That aside, you’re not hurt, are you Miss Irene?”

“I’m not… But, what should I do? I’ve stained someone’s book. This is a popular book amongst women downtown. Is there someone in the royal palace that likes this kind of book?” Her voice is full of doubt.

The book she was referring to was smeared with tea leaves. It is one of the most popular books in town, and reading about the daily life of a housewife from a fisherman town is interesting and sometimes moved me to tears.

I felt uncomfortable and came out from the doorway.

“Mm… that is my book.”

Bernsteins don’t distinguish quality in things that have been printed. However, this is not the normal consensus amongst nobles, and I feel ashamed because people wouldn’t expect the fiancée of the Crown Prince to like a book like this.

“Oh my.” Miss Irene covered her mouth cutely, then quickly began to apologise, “I’m sorry, Miss Elianna…! I ruined your belongings due to my carelessness…!”

Does she think that I’m angry because she ruined my belongings?

Before I could refuse, Prince Theodore’s sigh echoed around the room, “Everyone knows that they shouldn’t leave their belongings here. So the fault lies with Miss Elianna. You don’t have to apologise that much, Miss Irene.”

However, to calm the distressed Miss Irene, Prince Theodore informed me, “I’ll keep this. We will tidy up this mess, so you may go now. Miss Elianna, be more careful next time.”

I couldn’t say anything back to Prince Theodore who sounded cold, and barely managed to tell him about the ladder before leaving.

I often see Miss Irene and Prince Theodore getting along with each other after that.

About half a month ago, I saw her chatting happily with Sir Glenn Eisenach, a red-haired knight who serves as His Highness’s guard, and also affiliated with the Imperial Knights.

Sir Glenn is a cheerful person, and is popular with both men and women so this isn’t a rare sight. 

But then the next time, I was surprised when I saw her with Lord Alexei Strasser, a Duke who is a close aide to His Highness and also considered as his right-hand man. He is also known as the Ice Lord.

Like his nickname, he has black hair and ice-blue eyes, and looked intelligent. He treats everyone equally with his cold attitude, no matter if they are a high ranking noble or a cute lady. Therefore, seeing someone talk to him in an outgoing way is also rare for me. 

Also, according to the conversations I heard in secret, Lord Alexei is quite close with Alan Ferrera, the young, handsome, and popular Royal Maestro with honey-coloured hair.

At that time, I thought nothing of it.

It seemed he is seen in quite an unfavourable light by other males, but I suppose that jealousy and envy are at play there since all his acquaintances are famous people.

However, the interactions between His Highness and Miss Irene could be seen as intimate from other’s point of view, and Miss Irene’s feelings towards His Highness are conveyed through her earnest stares.

I see, I finally understand.

If you want to shoot the general, first shoot his horse… this might be rude, but I’ve seen evidence of this.

In spite of being a noble lady, I like books and tend to seclude myself to read them, so these interactions are a great way to build her connections and is worthy of praise. That is the skill I am supposed to demonstrate as the fiancée of the Crown Prince.

Is Miss Irene trying to gain a foothold to get close to His Highness? Or are the people around His Highness being considerate towards her because she has caught His Highness’s attention?

Even I don’t know which it is but this is clear.

The relationship between Miss Irene and His Highness didn’t just start yesterday.

Because His Highness Christopher was having fun and laughing like that.

“… Miss Elianna?” I came to my senses when I heard the voice that had suddenly called out to me. When did I get off the ladder? The laughter from outside had already disappeared before I realised.

I noticed that I had spaced out for a brief amount of time.

“What’s wrong?” The person who had asked me what’s wrong in a deep bass voice is the manager of the royal palace archives, Prince Theodore.

I thought he was someone who I wouldn’t exchange much conversation with, but we got closer when I started coming to the royal palace archives.

Prince Theodore looked at the book in my hand and ladder and frowned faster than I could shake my head.

“I’m sure I told you to call someone to get the higher books for you the other day.”

A noble climbing a ladder is definitely not commended by others. I apologised quietly.

Prince Theodore sighed. He even wasted a sigh on me even though he has been busy lately.

“I didn’t hear that you would be coming to the palace today. Where are your guards? This may be the royal palace, but don’t walk around here without an attendant.”

“Okay… I’m sorry.”

It was like a teacher scolding a naughty student.

Up until now, Prince Theodore was one of the people who tolerated my unbefitting behaviour as a noble lady, but does this mean that things won’t be the same as they were in the past?

“Does Chris know you’re in the palace?”

“… He doesn’t.”

I haven’t been to the royal palace in the past five days.

My aunt had hurt her lower back, so she requested me to starve off her boredom… in the name of nursing. Because of that, I was kept away from the books I wanted to read, and I endured the hardships of being forced to recite the romance novels and love poems my aunt proposed.

Today, I sneaked out of that torment and went to the royal palace archives to read the books I wanted to read, then I witnessed that scene.

Prince Theodore sighed again. He coldly chased me away from the archives by saying, “You should go home.”

As expected, my chest hurts. Prince Theodore was the only person, other than my relatives, with whom I could discuss books with. I thought that I could ask him about the book I had if I met him today.

I tottered through the corridor. Actually, the times when I have been chased out of the archives like this have increased in the past month. 

I had free access to the archives ever since I became His Highness’s fiancée, but the archive workers, who I have gotten to know, have become distant and seem like they’re trying to keep me away from the books. The chances for me to handle old books increased, but when I offered to help them with gloves on, they firmly refuse.

It was like they thought I would do something to the books, and it made me feel dejected.

But I finally understand after having witnessed the previous scene. Everyone must have seen that His Highness had found his special person, so they were distancing themselves from me little by little.

Looking back, the event that happened in the rose garden 10 days ago was also the same.

On that day, the regular tea party was scheduled to be held in the rose garden. But, I was detained by the Head of the Medical Department and was late. I quickly rushed to the rose garden with my male attendant.

The rose garden seemed to be noisy. It was Miss Irene and a few ladies-in-waiting.

“Geez, Miss Elianna!” I winced a little at Miss Irene’s accusing voice and strong gaze.

“Where have you been? Everyone has been waiting for you.”

It was my fault that I was late, even though I had a reason.

“I’m sorry. I had something to do… What happened?”

Miss Irene’s clothes and hair are wet. But the weather looked fine when I was in the corridor.

Miss Irene was startled and looked down to hide her intense gaze, then her body started shaking as if she had just remembered that she was wet and cold.

“Someone like me has done something rude. And for you to see me in this state… Please forgive me.”

Huh? I tilted my head. She was just telling the truth and there was no need for her to humble herself to that extent.

More importantly, if she doesn’t change her wet clothes then she’ll catch a cold. When I opened my mouth to speak, a sharp voice called out to me, “Miss Elianna!”

When I turned around, I saw the red-haired knight, Sir Glenn, running towards us with an unusually dangerous look on his face. Sir Glenn was more drenched than Miss Irene and the other women.

What had happened? He sternly inspected my appearance from head to toe, then also observed the male attendant near me and finally sighed in relief.

“Even so…” he muttered unpleasantly. I shrunk back at being blamed indirectly.

Did Sir Glenn also feel disappointed in me because I was late and made everyone wait for me?

He must have thought, “She’s not worthy to be the fiancée of my master, Prince Christopher.”

“Sir Glenn,” it was Miss Irene who called out to him. She spoke in a voice softer than the one she had used on me and tried to mediate between us, “You have to change your clothes. You can still catch a cold no matter how strong you are, Sir Glenn.”

Sir Glenn sighed a little at her gentle, consoling voice. “I’m fine. Miss Irene. You’re also covered in water. I want to ask you about this, so I will take you home.”

He called a nearby guard over in a stilted voice and told him to escort me home with an unusually strong gaze.

“The tea party is cancelled. There is a little uproar in the palace right now, and even His Highness is busy. So please go home for today.”

“But…”

If I don’t ask about the situation and apologise to the audience for my delay, then it would also affect Prince Christopher’s reputation.

I’d thought, but I was overwhelmed by Sir Glenn’s unusual unrested appearance, and couldn’t say anything else.

Sir Glenn left while talking to Miss Irene, and I learnt from the guard who had taken me home that the pipes in the rose garden had been damaged.

When I got home, I noticed that Sir Glenn had always taken me home whenever I left the royal palace.

And I realised later that that wouldn’t be the last time it happened.

Looking back now, they were all plausible events.

Like whenever Prince Theodore calls me in a formal way and coldly took his distance from me. Or like when Sir Glenn stopped smiling at me in a carefree way and made a clear distinction between where his attention should be.

It has been four years since I’ve become Prince Christopher’s fiancée. I was able to interact with His Highness’s close aides.

Sir Glenn, the red-haired knight, is friendly and doesn’t act like someone from court, and he was always willing to help me carry books. The Ice Lord, Lord Alexei, makes use of whoever is handy, and he uses me as a maid to sort out paperwork and run errands for him whenever I’m not reading.

And the hour that I spend chatting with His Highness and his four close aides, or sometimes five, was the first time I felt that I’d enjoyed something other than reading.

My place will probably be replaced with Miss Irene in the near future.

No, my place may already be gone.

Because that Prince Christopher had already showed his true self to people other than his relatives and close aides.

“… Oh dear.”

I stopped in the middle of the corridor and pressed my hand to my chest. It felt like a gaping hole had opened up in my heart.

Then finally, I realised that I was shocked even though I’m slow-witted.

The image of His Highness laughing was etched in my mind and wouldn’t go away. Same as the image of him acting intimately with Miss Irene under the shade of the tree.

I vaguely knew that this day would come. But when that time had actually arrived, I was assaulted with more shock than I could have imagined.

In the last four years, I seem to have grown very attached to my relationship with them.

―――  I am just his fiancée in name, and one day when he finds the person he loves, I will be relieved of my role.

I became his fiancée for that reason. ―――

That was what I was supposed to be.

This is strange. I, the 『Princess Bibliophile』, feel like crying because my chest hurts so much. The sense of loss I felt since losing my mother at the age of six, fills my heart.

I gently stroke the book that would always comfort me in times like this.

This book was something that was given to me by Prince Christopher about six days ago. It was on a bright afternoon.

His Highness, his close aides and his guards were tense after the rose garden incident, and I was also feeling uncomfortable.

I was reading like usual and His Highness spoke to me softly, “… I have a present for you.”

I slightly tilted my head. His Highness has never given me a gift.

I was always anxious when he gave me appropriate dresses and accessories befitting of a Crown Prince’s fiancée to keep his reputation whenever I go to balls or diplomacy events.

――― How many books can I buy with this accessory? I always think.

I didn’t say it into words, but His Highness probably also didn’t think that he needed to give national treasures to his fake fiancée. Presently, the beautiful accessories were hidden in the shadows.

Therefore, it was odd for His Highness to declare that he had a present for me, and it freshly resonated in my heart.

Prince Christopher was smiling like usual and he gave me a book that wasn’t even wrapped up.

“『Ruin of Kai Erg Empire: Celestial Edition』… Weren’t you asking for a book on empire history that wasn’t written by a historian? I had a hard time finding it because it rarely appears in the market… But I finally found it and wanted to give it to you as quickly as possible… But I thought you would be happy about it,” his smiling face as he said that was gentle, and he looked at me seriously as if he was waiting for my reaction.

I couldn’t put it into words straight away and trembled with emotion.

The book I had gotten was extremely difficult to obtain, even with the Bernstein’s connections, I had almost given up. Then, the book suddenly appeared in front of me and I was surprised and excited.

――― Most of all…

I was delighted that His Highness spared time and money and sought this book for me with great difficulty.

When I received it, I gently stroked the cover that was written in a foreign language and my heart was once again moved by how it felt.

“… Thank you very much, Prince Christopher.”

I didn’t know how to express my joy beyond this. I just stared at him with my emotions evident in my eyes.

His Highness also rubbed his chest as if he was relieved and smiled happily.

I was reminded of the happiness I felt at that time and calmed my sense of loss.

Even if His Highness has found someone who he could show his true self to, and even if he annuls our engagement, I believe that Prince Christopher wouldn’t treat me harshly.

Instead of waiting for my engagement to be annulled, I summoned up my courage to hear those words from his own mouth.

◊♦◊♦◊♦◊

His Highness’s office is also the room where I spend most of my time next to the royal palace archives.

At first, I had refused since I was only his fiancée in name and it would cause a lot of problems.

But he said 『This is the place where you could read freely without anyone disturbing you』. So I tried spending time in his office and realised that his office wasn’t bothered by noise at all. That was also the first time I felt that His Highness was keeping his word.

When I asked a chamberlain, who I was familiar with, to pass him a message, he looked extremely flustered. Is His Highness receiving an important guest?

I also noticed when the door of the next room which was used for meetings was opened and the waitress showed up. A bright, cheerful and adorable voice came from beyond the door, “――― I never knew that Prince Christopher was so interested in crafts.”

“Because you’re a smooth talker, Miss Irene.”

Oh! I couldn’t tell straight away which cheerful voice had pierced my heart.

Then, I heard Prince Christopher’s voice as if it was delivering the final blow, “Even if I gift you some crafts, they would probably be inferior to the ones the craftsman at your house make.”

“Is Your Highness going to give me a gift?” The voice which was brimming with joy echoed in my head like a decisive hit.

I see. I calmly understood somewhere deep in my heart. I took the present that I had received from His Highness as something special, but it didn’t mean anything particular to him.

Suddenly, the rare book that I was hugging close to my chest wasn’t so rare anymore and it became worthless.

I feel like I’m going to collapse. I calmly hold my breath that seems like it’s going to shake, got the upper hand on the waitress who was panicking, and barged into the room.

Prince Christopher stood up and trembled as if he was startled.

“Elli…?”

I was called by a nickname that only a portion of my relatives call me, however I first curtsy for entering the room without permission.

“Well, I don’t mind… But aren’t you supposed to be at your aunt’s today?”

Suddenly, I felt that my eyes had gone cold, which is unlike me. His Highness’s words were as if to say he had chosen when I wouldn’t be in the royal palace to deepen his relationship with another lady; it was as if he had such nasty thoughts.

At the same time, I felt my facial expressions which usually didn’t move, make a smile.

“… I can’t thank you enough for your concern over my aunt’s condition. I actually came here on a small errand today and I apologise for interrupting your conversation.”

“Wh-what is your errand?”

It was rare for me to see His Highness waver.

There are some familiar faces in the room. For some reason, Sir Glenn was covering his face with one hand, and Lord Alexei had a hand on his temple as if he was having a headache.

Miss Irene, the only woman in the room, looked surprised, but she still had the same frightened look on since I entered the room.

But, I didn’t pay attention to those three. The person I was staring at was Prince Christopher and only him.

With a smile, I imitated the smile His Highness always had, and made the biggest smile I could ever make.

“This book that I received from Your Highness the other day… I’m giving it back to you.”

“Huh…”

It was unusual for His Highness to freeze, and it looked a little funny.

“I don’t need it anymore.”

I stared at him one last time before putting the book on the desk. Then I curtsied and left the room.

There was no voice chasing after me.

When I got home, I was quite absent-minded. My father and brother came home and visited me, but I didn’t feel well so I refused dinner and locked myself in my room.

I, Princess Bibliophile, didn’t feel like reading.

“Get it together” and “I should acknowledge it” went around and around in my head. I sighed alone in the dark room.

Why am I so surprised and shocked that Prince Christopher can show his true self to another woman? Why was I devastated that his present to me wasn’t special and almost collapsed?

Why does my chest feel so tight and painful… and why does it hurt every time I breathe?

“… I see.”

It’s because I love His Highness.

I don’t know when it started. I love his blonde hair that shines in the sun, his crystal azure eyes which are like the clear blue sky, his dignified voice when he issues orders, his proud royal attitude, the times when he would show his stern determination and even his commanding gaze.

My heart grew painful just by remembering them. I realised for the first time that I was such a foolish person.

I pretended to understand and put on a face that made me look clever, but I didn’t even know the truth inside of my heart. A big-headed 『Princess Bibliophile』.

No matter how much I read or how much I learn from my predecessors, that knowledge won’t help me now. I realised too late.

Even my own heart doesn’t feel what I want.

I snorted at my own pitiful self.

I don’t even know what I should do from now on. The books don’t provide me with an answer at all.

All I know is that, the person next to His Highness… who would read to him under the sunlight that filters through the tree leaves, or enjoy tea with him on rainy days… isn’t me.

I didn’t feel like doing anything, and stared blankly as the night went on. 

Translator: Blushy
Editor: delishnoodles

Chapter end