Outaishihi ni Nante Naritakunai!! Chapter 195

―――― And we arrive at the present.

I struck a deal with Crown Prince Friedrich and came to the Royal Palace as a guest.
The red-eyed man who was with him hasn't bothered to appear since then.
Probably he's from Hiyuma clan. I heard about them from the King of Tarim. There's no doubt. I heard they're a master-serving clan - so it seems he serves either the Crown Prince or Sakura. That means there's no danger to me. There's no need to worry.
Honestly, I can't describe how godsend the Crown Prince's proposal was.
Even though she'd reincarnated, I found Sakura.
Since I want to be near her even if a little, I was truly grateful for it.
If Sakura is here, I'll also stay in this country.
I don't need to go to another country. Because, Sakura who I'd sought more than anything is now here.

Once I recognized she's Sakura, I understood she hadn't changed, enough to make me wonder why I hadn't noticed.
First of all, her gestures are exactly the same. Although her personality and the expressions she shows are certainly different, sometimes she unexpectedly shows faces that bear close resemblance to Sakura from the past.
I can understand the taste of the curry in that shop if Sakura produced it.
It could've only been made by Sakura. Haven't I understood that from the beginning. And yet, I was so foolish that I absolutely didn't consider the possibility of reincarnation.

Few days after coming to the Royal Palace. While I was busy, Sakura visited my room.
When she asked about my objective, I told her that it's fine.
From the start my objective was to return to Japan to watch over her grave.
Then there's no change, I'll watch over her who was reborn.
As if convinced, she smiled broadly.
A bright, gentle smile.
I wanted to hug her with all my power. Despite thinking so, I firmly endured.
She's already Crown Prince Friedrich's fiancée. I have no right to touch her.
Deliberately calling her Princess Consort I forbid myself.
To be honest, I wanted to hug her, even if forcibly, and block her lips.
I wanted to apologize for the past and beg for her love.

But, the reaction she showed when I gave my name.
With it I noticed she realizes who I am.
Moreover, I understood she was trying to feign ignorance.
In other words, her previous life had already ended for her.
Thinking about it, it's natural.
It's a story from two years ago for me, but for her it's a story from before she was born.
If her ex-boyfriend from her previous life appeared this late and said "That time was my bad", she'd only be troubled.

Right, for her I'm a man she's over with.
I reflected that I reap what I sowed. She moved on from me and will now marry a man she truly loves.
If I said anything this late, I'd only be a bother.
Because I understood that, I held my tongue.

And instead said.

"You really are fond of His Highness Friedrich, aren't you"

That.
It should have ended with her nodding. And yet, she made a troubled face like she didn't know.
Even though she delightfully blushed while talking about the Crown Prince.
Even though both at the time of the concert and when the Crown Prince came to pick up her she showed a smile and acted spoilt with her fiancé. Even though anybody who saw that would understand she's clearly in love with him.

Nevertheless, I understood.
Perhaps she's pretending not to notice due to my past actions.
At that time, although unconsciously, I continued hurting and hurting her.
I asked her friend during the wake - she didn't make any lovers afterwards.
Surely even at the time she died the pain still remained.
Even after she reincarnated - to not get hurt anymore, she must've become dreadfully dull regarding love. Unconsciously, to protect herself.
Having realized that, I could only think of the words of apology.

And then, I recalled my friend's words at the time he'd given me her address.

'… Don't mess up this time'

―――― You're right.

I spoke to my friend who's in a faraway place.
I understand. I won't make mistakes anymore.
This is something I must do.

I resolved myself and told her.

"Since I promised, it can't be helped. I'll encourage you just once"

I don't want to entrust her to another man, but it's no use crying over spilt milk.
She's already chosen that man.
I didn't make it in time.
No matter how painful it is, I must accept that.

She recognized her love and left for the man she yearns for. Afterwards, the struck cheek complained about pain.
I softly pressed it with my hand.
She slapped it with no hesitation when I tried to kiss her.
That's the answer. It's not me who she's chosen.

When I told her that I was glad after she reported that it went well, that were my true feelings.
But, what shocked me more than anything was the smile she showed me at the end.

I understood my utter defeat when I saw her smile that showed she's happy from the bottom of her heart.
He made her show such a smile. Surely, the Crown Prince treasures her more than I ever have. He will surely make her happy.

I slowly stood up.
Wanting to go outside for a breath of fresh air, I came out into the corridor. While I was absentmindedly walking, I happened to pass by the Crown Prince.
Seeing me, he called out to me.

"Sion"
"Well, well, Your Highness Friedrich"

I promptly bowed.
When the Crown Prince came here, he let me raise my face.
While looking around, he said.

"I thought Lidi went to your place. Where is she?"
"If you are asking about Princess Consort, she just went back"
"… I see, we've perfectly passed each other"

The Crown Prince was calm enough to wryly smile.
Of course. It's just after he connected with his beloved fiancée in the true meaning.
Even I'm affected by the happy aura that drifts from the Crown Prince.
I'm envious. Although I thought so, I started talking.

"Your Highness"
"What is it?"
"I have one question… Doesn't Your Highness think of locking Princess Consort deep inside the Royal Palace? Princess Consort seems to have a considerably free spirit. Aren't you anxious she may go off somewhere?"

Aah, His Highness understandingly nodded to my question and spoke.

"You're right. I won't say I'm not anxious. But, if I did that, Lidi surely wouldn't smile. I'd hate that"

Because, I love seeing her smile――――. I was moved by the Crown Prince unabashedly declaring that. I've never thought like that until now.
I thought that supposing I obtained her again, I'd treasure her and stow her away in a place nobody could snatch her away.
Besides, the Crown Prince continued while I was surprised.

"Lidi loves me. No matter where she goes, she'll come back right away… Since I know she'll come back, I can endure a little, don't you agree?"
"I, I see"
"It's a cheap price for seeing her smile… Does that answer satisfy you?"
"Yeah, thank you"

I thanked the Crown Prince and parted from him.
Not feeling like continuing my walk, I went back to my room.
With a thud I sat on the sofa.

―――― No surprise I lost.
While the Crown Prince said he can endure for the sake of her smile, I just wanted to hide her. It's only natural she's chosen him.

But, I can't remain shocked forever.
I must accept the ending.
Enough, I must look forward.
After these two years I've grown up enough to think so.
I took a deep breath and somehow recovered my usual self.
I tried thinking about what to do from now on a little.

For some time let's watch over Sakura and work for this country.
As promised, I'm willing to work as the tactician.
When we talked, I understood in practice. The Crown Prince is an excellent person.
I was impressed that he could nod to my request without being shaken in the slightest; I thought his attitude as he calmly judged to make me his vassal was what one would expect of the Crown Prince of a large country.
Same with Rena. Although I showed reflection magic, I honestly didn't expect she'd be forgiven for doing that.
In Tarim she would certainly be executed. I admire the broad-mindedness the King of Tarim would never show.
―――― I'm fine with being a tactician under him.
He won't waste life, for that reason I won't hesitate to use reflection magic.
Besides――――. After all is said and done, protecting this country means protecting Sakura.
I have no reason to refuse.
Rather, I'm happy my experience can be put to a good use.
I decided to talk about it when an opportunity arises.

Even so. When I properly ascertain her future - after all I want to eventually return to Japan.
Just as I'd decided at the beginning, I will spend the rest of my life watching over her gravestone in Japan. For that sake I'll continue looking for means to go back.
But, at least for now I'll relish in the happiness of being able to meet her again.
I continued going through hardships for two years. There were many times it was painful.
Many times I thought I'd rather die.
Even so, since I could meet Sakura like this, it's fine.

"Sakura, since you're okay I will give up, but Your Highness Friedrich. Supposing she turns her back on you――――"

At that time, I'll sweep her away and take her outside the country.
It's true that I've given up.
It's true that I want her to be happy, intend to watch over her, and return to Japan.

But, but――――.

"It's also true that I love the reborn Sakura all the same. That's why, if you ever hurt her, I'll take her"

I hope that doesn't happen.
That way, she can continue living happily. Even so, in the unlikely event that something happens.

"That time, I'll make you happy myself"

If that happens, I don't care if I don't return to Japan.

I made that vow to myself and stowed everything inside my heart.
That's my only vow. My only prayer.

"Mistress Meissa. You have my gratitude. Thanks to you I could meet Sakura again"

The witch who's said to make sure people's fates connect.

―――― To Wilhelm.

I don't know why she told me that, but I'm grateful from the bottom of my heart that she gave me that hint.
Unfortunately, I didn't make it in time, but still, I could see Sakura's smile.
That's enough.
I softly closed my eyes and murmured.

"Sakura. Please, be happy forever"

If Sakura is happy, I'm fine with that.
Even if it's at the hand of another man.

―――― After that, I celebrated fulfilment of her love with wine by myself; secretly I felt proud that I was able to celebrate it.

Author's note

But before that, I will be translating another 10 extras and the character introduction. This time they have no bearing on the main plot, so feel free to read them at your leisure. That said, I believe they won't disappoint (there will be lots of military uniform).

Chapter end