Nidoume no Jinsei wo Isekai de Chapter 1

Chapter 1: It seems it was a Peaceful Death

Author Note: It’s recommended to skim over this in a carefree manner.

“Pan-pa-ka-pan, Congratulations ! You have been given the right to reincarnate into a different world ! This is such a super rare thing to happen, one could compare it to winning a lottery ! You’re happy, right ? Right ? Yeah, it’s been decided that you are, indeed, happy ! Everyone, prepare the crackers !” (???)

“Eh ?” (Renya)

All of a sudden, something appeared in front of me. A little girl with blonde hair that was excited for some reason. A bunch of beautiful blonde girls with a pairs of white wings surrounded me.

Those blonde girls were, for some reason, wearing an unpleasant expression. In their hands, they were holding a somewhat larger version of crackers used for parties. They took a stance in unison.

“Do it !” (???)

On the little girl’s order, they pulled the strings simultaneously.

I don’t know what the hell these blonde girls are, yet, these crackers were making a thunderous roar as it shook the ground. I fall on my butt.

“Cracker released ! Music Squad, Equip Instruments ! The Clapping and Singing Squad, begin preparations !” (???)

Despite the unpleasant look on the girls, the little girl gave the orders with high tension.

Half of the girls took music instruments out of nowhere while the rest of them began to clap their hands together and brought them to their chest in preparation to sing together.

“This is really dangerous !” Renya’s brain alerted him.

Even those crackers had already caused such a big roar. Now, there were music instruments and songs ? What in the world would happen !?

Renya decided that his eardrums and heart couldn’t take anymore. He’s now thinking of how to get out of this situation.

“Song of celebration, ready…huh…nugya- !?” (???)

Without further thinking, Renya got up and mercilessly launched a perfect front kick to the little girl shouting off commands.

The little girl never thought that she would get attacked. She took the kick to the face and began rolling on the ground. (TL Note : LOL !)

After it had happened, he began to realize that all of the girls were taking orders from this little girl. This meant that she was the commander.

Of course, he looked around because nobody should have missed what he did just now. Yet, no one was moving.

Renya thought that these girls might not be able to move without orders. However, he then saw a number of girls smirking and laughing. Some of them even gave him a thumbs up gesture. He immediately changed his previous thoughts.

It seems that they are reluctantly following orders. There were even some girls that were secretly waving their hands to him.

“W-what are you doing !?” (???)

The little girl on the floor began to slowly stand as she protested to him.

Though Renya didn’t have any intention to point it out, seeing a girl that was wearing only a Kantoui (simple cloth with only 1 hole for head) tumbling on the floor, he averted his eyes as he attempted to not see something that he must not see. (E Note: Could barely find anything on the net for Kantoui.)

“You’re so noisy ! The crackers earlier were already as noisy as hell! If you lot began singing now, my eardrums would break, you know !?” (Renya)

“That’s not a reason to kick a little girl’s face !” (???)

“I don’t discriminate against age !” (Renya)

“I’m a girl you know !?” (???)

“My principle is that girl and boys are equal !” (Renya)

Renya declared that proudly. There was a slight commotion, yet, there was also some applause coming from the crowd.

“Why are you guys applauding him !?” (???)

The little girl yelled at the other girls, yet, the girls somehow averted their faces in unison, as if they had already planned it in advance.

While Renya was questioning what kind of group was before him, the girl turned towards Renya once again.

“Geez, I chose the wrong personnel.” (???)

“What are you talking about ? Or rather, where am I ?” (Renya)

As far I can see, this place is flooded with with girls that have wings. When I look up, I don’t see a blue sky. It’s like a thin white light that’s spread across the horizon. 

“This is the land of god.” (???)

“Oh~” (Renya)

Renya responded lazily towards the little girl with the thin chest.

“Kunugi Renya-san, you have died.” (???)

“Heh~” (Renya)

“You died by the age of 94 because of aging. Cool, right ? Long life Banzai !” (???)

Though she had declared it so, Renya still couldn’t believe it. According to the little girl, he died at age 94 not because of illness or accident, but because he had reached his lifespan. He had no recollection of such a thing.

“Well, because it’s troublesome to face an old man, I set your state back to when you were 18 years old.” (???)

Hearing this, a small blue vein popped up on Renya’s head.

“Oi…” (Renya)

“In fact, using a Loli appearance with those mature words, I find that gap moe or whatever is called disgusting. I’d prefer to call you Loli-Baba or Shota-Jiji.” (???)

“Oi, cut it out.” (Renya)

Certainly, it’s dangerous to speak whatever I want to this little girl. I tried to interrupt her, but it seems that this girl has no intention on stopping.

“I don’t really care but, keep such talk about your disposition towards minorities in the trash.” (???)

“So why’d you bring it up ?”

Renya’s tsukkomi was ignored.

“Back to the topic, you have been given the right to be reincarnated into a different world.” (???)

“Don’t need it.” (Renya)

The little girl froze at such an unexpected line. Ignoring the girl’s reaction, Renya continued.

“Somehow, it sounds like a pain. Furthermore, it seems exaggerated. Not to mention, I feel like you are trying to hide something from me.” (Renya)

“I-I wonder what are you talking about…” (???)

Renya continues to apply pressure in his voice as the little girl averted her gaze.

“If you say that my previous life was a peaceful death, there supposed to be no lingering feelings or regrets. Well, as I can’t recall anything, it’s not like I can attest to that. It might be that after I got sent to heaven or hell, I might just forget it, right ? Though I don’t really want to be sent to hell.” (Renya)

“T-That’s right ! If you refuse this, you will be sent to hell !” (???)

Of course, it was apparent that this was just made up on the spot. It was as suspicious as hell. Following this, Renya began to inquire.

“What are my charges ?” (Renya)

“Charges !? E–Ehm… Ah ! That’s right ! Murder !” (???)

“Hm, I died peacefully due to old age, right ? Does that mean I didn’t get caught until the day I died ?” (Renya)

The little girl’s face became strained.

“A-Ah, you died in jail !” (???)

“Oh, I surprisingly committed a crime at such an old age, huh ? Even if it wasn’t at that age, how many people did I kill ? Since, I apparently died due to old age in prison. So? How many did i kill ?” (Renya)

” A-Ah, that’s right ! People deprive others of life to maintain their own ! Basically, you’re one of those sinners !” (???)

“If that was the case, then that means there’s no Heaven ? Are all worlds just Hell ? Those who practice religion sure are insane.” (Renya)

“I-If they were vegetarian…” (???)

“I see,  so you’re one of those people who think that vegetation doesn’t have life. Or are you one of those people that arbitrarily place a large or small value on each life ? Are you one of those that think it’s bad to eat whales because they have intelligence, but still eat cows and pigs hypocritically ? Are you one of those people that can make friends with dolphins, yet can’t be friends with chickens ?” (Renya) (E Note: Damn it. Translating this was annoying…)

Renya thought that none of them were correct though. Even though Renya stopped there, if his opponent wanted to object again, he could still continue this pointless discussion. Most likely, in this girl’s head, the value of life was equivalent to a spec of dust.

“I’m sorry. I will apologize so, would you please listen to my explanation?” (???)

The girl prostrated herself in a dogeza. It was unknown whether the girl was aware of what Renya was thinking or not. (E Note: Renya’s an S…kudos.)

Applause came from the girls.

“Ugh, why do you guys clap when I meet such a terrible fate !?” (???)

The little girl stood up as all the other girls purposefully avoided her gaze. She was glaring at the girls while grinding her teeth. Following this, Renya made a small cough, making the little girl look at him again.

“I will listen properly since you intend to clearly explain it. After that, whether I agree or not is a different matter, though.” (Renya)

“Mu, I guess it’s fine. First, I am the being recognized as God. These erotic girls are what you call Angels.” (God)

sfx: Booing (E Note: Boos, jeers, complaints, etc.)

As jeers filled the crowd, the little girl simply gave a single glare, causing the commotion to die down.

“You girls are definitely erotic ! Who were the ones that tried to make kids with humans and performed yuri to the extent that they somehow got a virgin pregnant, huh !?” (God)

Upon hearing the little girl’s voice, quite a number of the girls looked of into the distance with an expression that said “I know nothing”.

“Seriously, you girls’re only good at complaining…” (God)

“That doesn’t matter. Please continue the explanation.” (Renya)

“Eh ? No tsukkomi this time ?” (God)

Suprisingly, the little girl said that.

“Well, people are free to name themselves anyway. Then, which god are you ? Jesus ? Buddha ? (TL Note : It actually written as 南無なんちゃら ,  Let’s assume it’s buddha.) Or, pay-back (TL Note : やったらやり返せ i don’t know X_x) god ? ” (Renya) (E Note: Not sure either. Any suggestions would be appreciated.)

“Please stop. Don’t compare me to something that humans created.” (God)

The girl frowned.

“I am me. No one else. I am the one who creates and controls all.” (God)

“Wow, so cool. Now then, why did Kami-sama bother to appear before one person ?” (Renya)

As Renya spoke with a sarcastically humble tone, the little girl frowned…

“You didn’t believe me right ? It doesn’t matter though. I have a clear reason to show myself in front of you. That’s because I have a request for you.” (God)

“Does it have anything to do with the right of reincarnating into another world ?” (Renya)

“That was the request itself. Basically, I want you to go to that world.” (God)

The little girl said thus while quietly looking up at Renya.

Chapter end