I've Became Able to Do Anything with My Growth Cheat, but I Can't Seem to Get out of Being Jobless Vol 9 Chapter 289

(289) Dark-Elf pillow sale(?)

Translator: Tseirp

“Ah, so you’re referring to that . ”

“Affirmative . I do not comprehend what master expected but yes that is what I meant . ”

“No, Pionineechan . Master is definitely looking forward to us squeezing his body fluids out of him . ”

“We are currently squeezing master’s body fluids out . ”

“We are just wiping master’s sweat . ”

I was currently in swimming trunks sweating inside a hot and humid closed room .

It was Pionia’s specially-made sauna which allowed magical power to flow with sweat .

“Sheena No . 3 is working hard desu!”

“Ah, yes yes, good job . ”

The stone that Sheena No . 3 was burning was sprinkled with special water which turns into a mist that encourages the released of magical power and was being blown in my direction with a large fan .

It was truly the löyly sauna style .

It was good, it was great but I was troubled with where to look at when looking at Pionia and Neete .

They wore a loincloth below, white linen wrapped around their chest and a traditional Japanese straight-sleeved coat worn above it .  (TLN: Fundoshi, Sarashi, and Happi . ) Sheena No . 3 was wearing the same attire and their coat had a fan drawn on it like those festival clothes .

It felt like I was in a shrine .

“Master, please release a lot of sweat . ”

“Master, your face is red . ”

Pionia and Neete commented as they continued their task of wiping and wringing out my sweat .

“My face is red because I am sweating and it is hot in here …”

I was definitely not feeling excited in that situation .

My magical power was being released properly but I wondered if that method actually provides the highest concentration of magical power?

I felt that it was more efficient doing it regularly with a massage .

After the two of them finished squeezing out the sweat they collected from me, they drank it on the spot .

Even if I did sweat a lot, it won’t end up as a large volume to drink so they finished quickly but they made poor expressions .

Although I would be troubled if they looked satisfied after drinking another person’s sweat .

” … It’s thin . ”

“Yeah, thin … what’s the reason? In theory, it should be a lot more delicious . ”

“I know, the reason is this room . As this room is filled with steam to promote the dispersal of magical power, the magical power that we wipe from Master’s sweat is escaping into the air . ”

“What a miscalculation!”

Neete shouted as if it was an earth-shattering event .

“You should have thought of it at the time of designing this!”

I shouted but Neete and Pionia looked like they were up to no good as they started discussing something while looking at me .

“In other words, rather than wiping it with a cloth, it would be better to drink the sweat that comes out directly, Pionioneesan!”

“Affirmative, Neete . As expected of my younger sister . ”

“Wwait, directly drinking means, you girls —”

This time, I don’t think my imagination was wrong .

“Please keep still, it won’t hurt . ”

“Or rather, I have confidence that it will feel good . ”

“Wwait, you girls! What do you plan to do with those tonguessss!?”

I was being pressured by the two of them and I stretched my hand toward Sheena No . 3 for help but —

“Temperature and heat have exceeded the allowable range desu … entering cooling mode desu …”

Sheena No . 3 nonchalantly switched to cooling down mode .

Don’t work in a hot and high humidity space if you are a precise junk machine!

I didn’t have the chance to shout as Pionia and Neete preyed on me .

“That was terrible …”

I was really conscious when they licked my armpits .

Although I was able to protect having my pants on until the very end .

Incidentally, after Pionia and Neete finished their magical power replenishments, they carried the frozen Sheena No . 3 to a cool location and Rarael took over .

The third report was regarding the Dark-Elves .

“That’s really unfortunate . Here, please have this tea made from fruits from the fruit trees in the forest . ”

“Thank you, Rarael … ah, delicious . ”

It was a slightly sweet tea .

Delicious … Ha, I’m healed .

“If you hated it that much, couldn’t you just escape?”

“I thought of doing so but the exit was sealed and they came on so strong in a short time that it would be hard for me to hold back . I wouldn’t want to hurt the two of them . ”

“So nice of you … as expected of Ichinojo-sama . ”

“Moreover, it wasn’t as though I disliked it . However, I don’t wish to touch the two of them so it was more like prolonged anguish for me . ”

“Prolonged anguish? If Ichinojo-sama wishes, you may use the Dark-Elves . We will work hard to satisfy Ichinojo-sama . ”

Rarael, I was just mentioning that such advances were tough on me .

Rarael was attractive but I was currently making Carol wait so I don’t plan to touch any other girls .

“Ah, right . I met Doxco . He made a beautiful grave after finding out that you all died . Even though it would be hard for him to continue working with the Shiraraki Kingdom if it was found out . ”

“He did something like that … I’m grateful . ”

Rarael smiled with a slightly complex expression .

She was happy for his thoughts but had to endure lying to him about the truth .

“That’s right, Rarael . What is the third report?”

Rarael’s expression sank even though I said that to change the topic .

“It’s a shameful matter regarding my family so I don’t really want to talk about it but …”

Ah, so it’s a bad report .

“Well, I’m family now too so you don’t have to be embarrassed . ”

“I’m grateful you say that . Actually, a portion of the Dark-Elves wishes for pillows . ”

“Pillows? Pillows not as a metaphor but the actual item normally used to sleep?”

“Yes … those pillows . A portion of them requested Pionisama and Neete-sama for the production but are currently waiting for Ichinojo-sama’s approval . ”

“Ah, something like that? I think they can just go ahead for something like pillows . ”

“The pillow … isn’t an issue but the pillowcase is more problematic . ”

“Pillowcase?”

The pillowcase can easily be made though .

They even made those festive attires they wore just now .

“This is one of the prototypes …”

“They even made prototypes?”

I picked up the folded pillowcase .

It felt nice to touch and it certainly seemed possible to have nice dreams when using it .

But I felt that it was a little big to be used as a pillowcase .

“Hn?”

I had a bad feeling and spread the pillowcase open .

” ……… !? Oi, what is that?”

“A pillowcase . ”

“A cover … for a hug pillow . Of a life-size Ichinojo-sama . ”

That’s right . There was an illustration on the pillowcase that was probably modeled after me (Although it was a lot more handsome than the real person and it wasn’t a mirror so looking at it in person was a little disconcerting .

Moreover, the outer surface was me in my regular clothes while the inside was me baring my upper body … and there were more muscles compared to the real person .

” … Hey, it’s a bit rude to say this but … are Dark-Elves crazy?”

“It’s a little rude to say this but they were poisoned by Neete-sama . They converse very frequently . ”

” … Ah, I’m sorry about that . ”

” … It’s okay, I’m sorry too . ”

As Rarael apologized, a paper slipped out from her grip .

“Hn? This —”

“Ah, Ichinojo-sama, that is!”

“Pre-order list?”

That was the pre-order list for the hug pillowcase among the Dark-Elves .

They have started pre-ordering even though it has not even been decided to be in production?

” … Rarael, why did you order as well?”

” … Th-that is …”

“Moreover, three . ”

” … Hug pillow salesperson Ririana said that we need to have one for ornamental use and one for safekeeping …”

“I see I see … I’ll consider it good that it didn’t become a cult . ”

I said with a smile .

“But the hug pillow is rejected . I’ll be confiscating this as well . ”

“N-no way! Please, I was so nervous that I couldn’t sleep when I used that prototype hug pillow but when morning came —”

“It’s even worse if it prevents you from sleeping! And you used it!?”

Even though I rejected it, the Dark-Elves who should have sworn allegiance to me, gathered signatures and appealed against the order to stop the production of the hug pillow .

After that, I had a discussion with several of the Dark-Elves including Rarael .

In the end, I compromised with making cushion covers of my caricature .

Doxco … the Dark-Elves you are worried about are doing fine, although I feel that they are traveling down a strange direction .

Chapter end