Celestial Employee Chapter 9 Choiceless

Chapter 9 Choiceless

“Her toilet is not the only one clogged.” Manager Zhang smiled.

Manager Zhang would always put on a amiable and friendly expression towards everyone. Those who did not know better would think that he was like a Laughing Buddha[1], a good person. But those who knew this fatty, knew that his smiles concealed daggers, ready to stab you in the back at an opportune moment. This fatty was in reality a treacherous and sly person. In the past, after a business trip, Zhao Lingjun had a taste of it when claiming the expenses, and suffered a great loss at the hands of Fatty Zhang. Therefore, when looking at the fatty with his jiggling belly, Zhao Lingjun wanted to tell him in the face, “Could it be that you also use sanitary napkins, and also throw used napkins into the toilet bowl?”

But Zhao Lingjun knew better, if he had said it out, he would have been risking another stab in the back later on. Therefore Zhao Lingjun could only put on a superficial smile and say, “Manager Zhang, since everyone’s toilet bowls are clogged, why don’t you take a plunger and unclog it? If it doesn’t work, finding me is of no use either. I’m not a plumber and can’t help you.”

After he said this, he noticed Wu Xiaoye flash a smile from the back of the crowd. Although it lasted for a split second, but Zhao Lingjun had an extraordinary sense of gratification. Just that split second, turned even the sweltering heat into nothingness.

“If it was a problem with the toilet bowl, we would have already called a plumber. But all our toilets are clogged, it seems to be an issue with the sewers.” Manager Zhang smilingly said. “When you returned home, did you not use your bathroom and thus didn’t find out that the water couldn’t drain out?”

“F*ck!” Zhao Lingjun screamed inwardly. Nowander the water seemed to stop draining earlier. Zhao Lingjun had thought that it was caused by the water supply being cut-off and a lack of water, and not by a clogged sewer. Zhao Lingjun was too embarrassed to say that his toilet bowl was clogged with a pile of dump, and in the end chose to say, “I haven’t used it. Why did the sewer clog? Is there even any use in shouting for me when the sewer is clogged?”

“Before calling you down, we had already looked for the property management to find the reason.” Zhang Zhong said as he pointed towards a black hole. “They finally found the reason, and it was because one of the sewer intersections got clogged.”

“If it’s clogged, why don’t you find them to unclog it? Did we not pay the management fees?” Zhao Lingjun looked at the black sewage hole, and its matching black cover at its side and had a sudden inexplicable uneasiness.

“They have already tried to unclog it. But sadly, their tools weren’t long enough, thus it’s still clogged up.” Zhang Zhong grinned. Seeing his grin Zhao Lingjun had a sense of foreboding.

“Since their tools aren’t long enough, wouldn’t changing the tools would solve the issue?”

“They are retrieving the tools, but can only get it ready by tomorrow afternoon.” Zhang Zhong replied.

“It can’t be! Zhao Lingjun said in disbelief. “To wait until tomorrow afternoon on such a hot day, wouldn’t our whole building smell like a public toilet?”[2]

“Exactly! These people are so unprofessional when doing things. Having to wait till tomorrow in such a hot weather, wouldn’t we just suffocate to death first?” Hao Meili chimed in. “Therefore, Xiao Zhao, we decided to delegate a person to go down. In the end, after brainstorming, we found that you were the only one suitable.”

“I…” Zhao Lingjun really wanted to slap his big mouth numerous times. Out of all the bad things he could have said, he just had to say that. If he had the chance to go back in time, he instead would have said, “Since it’s like this, everyone should sleep earlier. At most we could wear a face mask to bed.”

Obviously Zhao Lingjun did not have another chance and could only indignantly say, “Why me?”

After saying this, he used a savage expression, and glared at everyone except Wu Xiaoye. Zhao Lingjun decided that if anyone dared to give a reason, he would go to a garden, pick up a big brick and smack him to death.

Zhao Lingjun was full of murderous intent at the moment, but Zhang Zhong turned a blind eye, ignored it and regretfully said, “Actually, I wanted to do it myself, but look at my physique and at that hole. Even if I could squeeze in, you would need a crane to hoist me out.”

Zhang Zhong’s words sparked everyone to burst into a fit of laughter. The ones who laughed the loudest was Hao Meili’s Hengha Er Jiang, Zhang Lin and Qin Ye. Looking at the two boot-lickers, Zhao Lingjun could only furiously lash out in his heart. “MLGBD!”

Zhao Lingjun knew that even if Zhang Zhong was as slim as Stefanie Sun[3], he still would not go into the sewers. Unless of course, he was kicked into the hole.

Zhao Lingjun had to impulse to kick him down, but knew that even if he kicked Fatty Zhang in, he would get stuck in the manhole. This was because, Fatty Zhang’s last sentence was in fact the truth, his waist looked close to or even bigger than that of the hole.

“I’m not the thinnest here.” Zhao Lingjun coldly commented, giving the crowd a cold glare.

“Aiyo, you want a woman to go in?” Hao Meili deliberately stuck out her chest and rebutted when she saw Zhao Lingjun land his gaze upon her.

Zhao Lingjun felt a chill down his spine, and immediately looked away from this woman’s witch like body.

After he looked away, his heart became colder than a bowl of ice water.

“The company provided meals are so bad, what did these people even eat? How could they all be fat?” Zhao Lingjun wanted to cry but had no tears.

Normally Zhao Lingjun would not purposefully observe his colleagues waistlines, but when he glanced, to his amazement, only three people in the crowd had slimmer waistlines than him.

The first was the perverted old witch, Hao Meili.

The other two were Zhang Changsheng and Wu Xiaoye.

Zhang Changsheng was his direct superior, and Zhao Lingjun’s work life was dependant on him. Since he first joined the company, Zhang Changsheng spared no effort to groom and take care of him. At the start, whenever Zhao Lingjun created a mess, Zhang Changsheng would take full responsibility for it, and shoulder the blame. Zhao Lingjun was both grateful and thankful towards Zhang Changsheng for all that he has done.

Therefore Zhao Lingjun could not thicken his skin and say to Zhang Changsheng, “Big Brother Zhang, why don’t you go down the sewers and help everyone unclog it?”

Then how about Wu Xiaoye you ask?

I’m afraid that even if someone used Qing Dynasty’s 10 Tortures[4] on Zhao Lingjun, until he could neither beg for his life nor for death, Zhao Lingjun still would not say, “Wu Xiaoye, how about you take a trip into the sewers.”

Chapter end