Alice Tale in Phantasmagoria Chapter 111

――Wishing is meaningless is it.

――Praying is a curse is it.

The origin of the child stamping frustratedly's way of thinking, the beginning of my days of battle――

What I sought was, strength.
On a certain day, I became aware of my power as a miko.
Even if it was a coincidence, presently with deshi's magic residing within this body, there's hope for me.
If I use it fully, that should change.
I will become stronger for that purpose as well.
Having o-shishou-sama take me in as her disciple wasn't a simple matter.

「I refuse. I no longer have the will to take a disciple.」

That sort of thing was her standard line.
To begin with I didn't have the aptitude for magic.
Even setting aside o-shishou-sama's state of mind, I suppose I wasn't appropriate as her disciple.
There was a necessity to grow stronger so I could receive her approval.
I forced my body to become stronger.
The one who was unable to simply watch as I haphazardly brought harm upon my body was, Eclair-san.
While creating awful black rings under the eyes, Eclair-san went along with my training for me.

「Rin, please stop already. You have no talent……you won't become like Alice.」

It would become a lie if I said I wasn't injured but, I eventually noticed the meaning behind the seemingly apologetic words Eclair-san scraped together.
I didn't want to advance down the road of battle.
Since there's the matter where I accepted the inheritance of the mansion, even continuing my lifestyle presented nothing troubling.

But that's wrong.
My one and only wish, was the act of saving deshi.
There wasn't something like a path outside of that.
If I didn't have that wish then surely――I would've died.

Eclair-san patiently accompanied me, who wouldn't listen to what she said.
My power was, the power to absorb 『all things』 and store them.
For example I can embody the method used to bestow magic on a weapon, with this body.
Furthermore that isn't limited to magic.
Doing an enchant with the durability of iron, I punch with my fist.
Doing an enchant with Eclair-san's techniques, I use skills.

There are of course limits.
But in a certain meaning the possibility of becoming the strongest was hidden within, should that be mastered.
Hypothetically even if it's a borrowed good, that is my power.
I intently, did special training to polish that power.
After a while, Eclair ceased to accompany my training.
Asking why, and――

「……Ma, a bit of a miracle. Really, you could call it a forgotten memento.」

For the first time since deshi ceased being with us, Eclair-san had a smile as she bashfully seemed just a little happy.
Since that day, my lonesome training began.
What I did didn't change as a result but, there was a huge problem in what I had to do.
The fact that to use deshi's magic, my magic power was overwhelmingly lacking.
Most likely, it's impossible without o-shishou-sama or Eclair-san's level of magic power.
That wasn't something where something would come of it with training.

I want to use it.
How?
That's decided.
I'm a person who cannot fight with my 1 self.
Then there's nothing except to procure even magic power.

――There's no choice except to steal it.

Sneaking into o-shishou-sama's bedroom, I face the sleeping o-shishou-sama and silently pray.

「You would steal my magic power? For some reason, don't you have quite the nerves.」

The o-shishou-sama who I'd thought was just sleeping got up and, faced me with a sharp gaze.
My body went rigid, like a frog stared at by a snake.

「You should stop. You can't use something like magic power that surpasses your own capacity. It's something like fetching water using a container with an open bottom.」

O-shishou-sama breathed a sigh as she stared steadily at my face.

「……But well, if it's just one moment I supppose it might not be unusable……drill the skill to wield magic power into your body. And then take what you need to activate your magic in an instant. If you do so then something will come of it……possibly.」

I've run out of patience.
Shrugging her shoulders as if to say that, since that day, o-shishou-sama came to become my o-shishou-sama.
O-shishou-sama's training wasn't something so kind as Eclair-san's.
Such a thing as becoming battered was an everyday occurrence and, the event of being on the edge of death wasn't rare either.
And so the nights and days flowed――

　◇■◇■◇

The seasons change.
However the things to do don't change.
In the mansion's yard, I spar.
Just――the opponent has changed.

「Naive.」

I utilize the crimson girl's power to hold her down as she rushes in in a straight line.

「Wa waa! Mo～～! Rin's too strong! Hold back more!」

Pure crimson hair with, amber eyes.
The adorable girl with an appearance that seems captivating even to those of the same sex inflated her cheeks.
Even when I released my lock her cheeks remained inflated.

「Lumina is simple issn't she, since you move in a straight line too frequently.」
「That's fine, because I'll push through everything with power.」
「Haha.」

That the things prodigies say are different aren't they.

「You 2, would you like tea or the like? How about taking a break?」
「Ane-sama～! I will I will.」

Lumina ran off, at Silvis' voice after she prepared tea at the terrace.
After effortlessly receiving her tackle that had a sensation of a ramming attack, Silvis――Silvi is stroking Lumina's head with a yosh yosh.
Even though it could be said that their ages aren't all that different, they're clearly ane and imouto.
The girl called ane-sama is, a girl with coiled pink silver hair and an atmosphere like a princess-sama.
Looking at these children's smiles, thorns bite into my chest.

Because my wish has, not changed even once since that day.
There's no wavering.

「――Nee you 2? Do you not want to, meet mother-san?」

Those 2 people make bewildered faces, at the sudden question.

「Mother……is it? No, I think she's surely busy.」
「? Mama, always welcomes me home you know?」

I shake my head with a that's not right you know.

「There should be a happier future, so I am……」

Whatever smile I see, whatever happiness I see, my heart isn't satisfied.
Happiness is poison.
My heart merely tightens.
At this rate there's nothing like a reason to stop these thoughts and live my daily life.
Such a thing is nothing more than continuing on inertia.
I suppose it's fine already.
It's enough.
If it's the current me, I should go.

「Since, I'll surely accomplish this!」

Doing a wink like that――――my unending nightmare began.

　◇■◇■◇

The first time I transferred worlds.
The story wasn't something so simple.
To begin with it wasn't the case that I moved within my own time axis.
This is a similar yet different world.
A place that should be called a parallel world.
At first, that reality caused me to despair.
Even so, if I can save her I want to save her.
Renewing my determination I commenced action.
I had trained enough and, become strong.
That overconfidence――caused my failure the first time I challenged it.
The price of acting overconfident was awful.
The moment a death first occurred before my eyes.
While listening to the sound of my heart breaking into pieces, I used magic and repeated the world.

――The 2nd time.

When I went back to my own world, that place was right in front of the fallen deshi.
Just as in my memories, her body had shrunk.
Time had wound back.
……If I'm doing it either way, I should return further back than this.
I understand……
Because the starting point is here, there's nothing earlier.
This scenery, gouged my heart even more deeply.
I who had 『efficiently』 trained night and day as if crying in lamentation, crossed worlds once again.

This time, I attempted a revision to the trajectory.
Not defeating it by fighting but, avoiding fighting itself.
There's no need to go and purposefully jump into danger.
However perhaps it would be best to call it history's corrective power, the nightmare repeated with ridiculous developments.

――The 3rd time.

I did the act of revealing my true form.
Up until now I've been at her side as an adventurer who didn't even give her name but, it's no good with that.
Explain the particulars and, avoid danger.
However when I made everyone aware that I was Rin, the ridiculous corrective power of the world operated and ejected me.
I thought that it's probably bad to cause myself to be aware of myself.
Whichever way it is, the risk in revealing my true form is high.

――The 4th time.

I did the act of, naming myself Makina.
So as to act like an artificial god and resolve the story.
I earnestly lived my life from the start again.
But I didn't reach it.
I didn't have a sufficiently decisive strike.
What did I lack in?
Capability?
Wisdom?
Equipment?
I thought deeply.

――The 5th time.

I repeat the nightmare again.
My wish alone thrust me into action.
I did the act of reviewing my equipment.
Copying deshi, I had Saira create it for me.
It was done well.
It became such that I was able to efficiently manifest my own special techniques.
Even so―― I didn't reach it.
More, there's more.

――The 6th time.

It's duty at this point.
Will someone besides me save you?
To defeat the giant snake a superficial technique is no good.
Decisiveness is necessary.
Relying only on tools or the like is no good, being negligent in my preparations is also no good.
Training day and night――while clinging to hope.

――The 7th time.

It's obstinacy at this point.
Not enough, I still won't reach it.
On this redo I don't even protect the things I'm protecting due to different developments.
It's fine to keep contact at the minimum limit.
At this point, it won't stop――

――The 8th time.

Complete.
With this, I'll be able to defeat the giant snake.
I was able to prepare a decisive blow.
However even so――it wasn't defeated.
It's a monstrosity.
Perhaps it has an immortal body in the true meaning of the word.
I realized the true from of its immortal nature.
It's the core, the core is located elsewhere.
If that isn't defeated along with it, there'll be no end――――

――――The 9th time.

「I will defeat it, I will change that!!」

I stand before the giant snake.
I'll end this before deshi comes.
With the giant snake showing its face from the volcanic crater, I confront it with every weapon I have prepared.
Saa……let's bring this to a close.

「――I'm coming.」

I put my hand into my space and, I take out a weapon I prepared.
2 Mana Revolvers.
Facing the 8 snake heads rushing toward me, I alternate and fire off all their munitions.
I have no intention of conserving money.
Water bullets stop its movement and, lightning bullets smash.
It's burned away with flame bullets――once the 2 revolvers run out of bullets, I discard them without hesitation.
I put my hand into my space and――brought out a bazooka.
The bazooka's content has a high purity magic shell.
The essence of battle is preparation.
For example even if I lament this body's lack of talent, I'll show that even if it's a prodigy, even if it's a monstrosity, I will win.

「Break!!」

Fire!
Discard, take out, fire!
Discard fire, discard fire!
An impact sufficient to make me wonder if the volcano had exploded.
As if I'd allow even dust to remain!!

「Tsu!」

From my feet, a tail came to deliver an attack.
I take out a magic shield of the highest quality and thwart it.

「Hurry up and, breeaak!!」

The high purity magic bullets that had been improved and whose improvements had also been improved――I took out all of my hand grenades and threw them.
My eardrums broke from the thunderous noise.
Doesn't matter――the path is open.
The larger part of the giant snake's body that protrudes from the volcanic crater became meat fragments and were blown away.

「Cast release! Icicle・Garden!」

Watching the giant snake's meat fragments out of the corner of my eye, I jump into the roiling boil within the volcanic crater.
Hot!
This magic power is totally insufficient!

「――Ku, cast release! Icicle・Garden!」

By layering 2 together it's finally at an endurable level.
No matter how meticulously I prepare, it's this sort of thing in the end.
There isn't enough magic power in me to impede magma's roiling boil.
I smiled just a little.
That's fine……if this body melts away, that's fine if at least my objective is fulfilled.
Because a road home isn't necessary.
Diving deep into the roiling boil of magma is a strange sensation so, it's like entering a pot and being boiled within.
Nothing like a moving object exists besides the undulating magma.
I dive deeper and deeper, within a temperature sufficient to melt even iron.
I felt a strange silence like nothing in this world.

「It's here……」

A large mass like a crystal that doesn't show any sign of melting from the heat, without sinking and without floating either, exists in that place.
The true form of the Yamata no Orochi is, this mountain itself.
The mountain's incarnation.
That is already god's creation and, it's not something human hands can reach.
With this situation destroying the core really does seem impossible.
To begin with, it might not be such that it can break.

「But even I, have named myself as an artificial god.」

I silently pray.
I suck away that power and, it resides in this body.
I steal, the wellspring of the Yamata no Orochi's life.
Coming here by endlessly repeating, there's something I realized.
Fate is connected.
The fact that I housed the giant snake's core here means, this should exist as unchanged reality the 『next』 time I repeat.
Thus today, this time, the reality of the sort that this was accomplished is necessary.
Accepting the creepy sensation like my heart was being rewritten into myself, the magic power in my wall of water was exhausted.
Most likely, there's no longer, another chance――I crossed over while thinking as such.

　◇■◇■◇

――――The 10th time.

I stand in front of my familiar mansion.
There's something I suddenly, thought of.
In truth――am I not dead?
I define my 『original world』 and what it carries.
Was the world that I returned to as a child after my failure my 『original world』?
Only my memories were launched into every world, that belief would be more coherent than bodily transfer.
The people I met in this world, the people I didn't meet.
Everyone is gathered here.
When I come to here, a bit of life returns to my heart――

And so――Everything ended.

Alice-san really is beautiful issn't she.
In the end that pointless sort of impression floated in my head.
In short with just that, I might unexpectedly have no regrets.
Goodbye――

　◇■◇■◇

「……Eh?」
「Ah, Rin-chan? You've woken up?」

I came to myself and, I'm being carried on Alice-san's back and, we're going down the mountain.

「Eh? Eh??」

Strange.
I didn't use magic.
I won't return anymore.
To begin with――It's strange for Alice-san to be here after returning!!

「Fufu, still sleepy?」
「Alice-san!」
「……Alice-san??」

Alice-san twisted her neck.

「Why!?」
「To say why……after Rin-chan took an afternoon nap, I'm carrying her down the mountain?」

What sort of thing is this, my body has returned to the time of my childhood.
Repeat?
No, that's not it.

「……Causality reversed? As the result of walking across worlds, the interference came together……that sort of thing?」
「……………………Rin-chan? It, it might be my imagination. But, I feel like you're saying something incredibly complicated.」

The body is a child, the brain is……Alice-san is twisting her neck, while muttering something like that.

「But, be that as it may……I can't explain the reason I'm alive.」

It's overly convenient.
This, isn't my power.
Some other, something?
Some other…………something interfered??
At this point, I'm unable to investigate that thing.
That, final world's irregularity was――――the fox?

「……」
「……I, I wonnder what's, with this strange sense of tension.」

I try messing with Alice-san's beautiful hair.
Smooth and, barely catches in the hand.
It's a good texture like silk, a sort of intoxicating sensation.

「Kora kora, when I thought that you might've suggested something a little difficult, you revert back to a mischievous child――Hyaaa!?」

Those called elves are hard to understand, so I tried bitting her slightly sharp ears a little.
I try nibbling.

「Sto, stopp, koraa! Rin-chan! ――Wahyahyahyaa.」

I try tickling her armpits.
While slender and emaciated, her properly soft femininity remains.
With my ride suspended, I was put down.

「Haa, haa……Ri, Rin-cha～n? I also have thoughts about, mischievous children of such an extent you know?」

Alice-san approached threateningly, while sharpening her amber eyes that are well ordered enough to surprise me.
I ended up smiling.
Alice-san supports her cheek on her hand as if to say she won't be convinced.

「Nn?」
「Do a kiss! An adult's!」
「An, an adult's――!? Nmuu!?」

I tried doing, an amazing kiss.
With enough kissing to stretch a line between us, Alice-san froze up.
Nn～, I suppose I really am still too childish.
She'd have become a more pure red if I was Eclair-san wouuldn't she.

「……」
「……」
「……Did you feel it?」
「I didn't feel it!! Eh!? Rin-chan? You're Rin-chan right!? Have you become strange!!?」
「A vast time changed me.」
「Even though you only took an afternoon nap!?」

What is this……this, kind world……

「Rin, chan……?」

My tears overflowed as my smile remained.

「Nee, deshi……」

It wasn't pointless, that I arrived here……

「Nn?」

Wishing isn't pointless or such, praying isn't anything like a curse.
If there is karma to that which is called fate, I may have cheated a little but……
Even so, I was properly, given my reward.
After walking while covered in anxiety, hope properly existed.
The miracle of various factors overlaying together might, be at its end.
But, afterwards is already……just, living to my fullest in this world――!

「I'm home!」

I caused Alice-san's eyes to be bewildered but, she gave her reply with the best smile.

「Un, welcome back――」――That.

―――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――

Next time, something like an epilogue

Chapter end